The truth behind the smile
by Tinni
Summary: What lies behind the smile of Ichimaru Gin? How can Gin and Rangiku make peace before he is put to death? How did it ever come to this?
1. Chapter 1

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_1 day before the execution_

His execution was tomorrow but it was a pointless gesture. He was already dead. He died the same night she did. Tomorrow they would simply be destroying his spirit body. His heart had died days ago.

"Captain," Kira called, a note of begging in his tone, "Captain! Don't you... don't you want to see them?"

Ichimaru did not respond, just continued to stare out the window at the Sokyoku Hill, where he was to be put to death tomorrow. The Shihoin Clan had finally rebuilt the Sokyoku. It had claimed it's first kill the day before, Tosen Kaname the traitorous former captain of squad nine, tomorrow it would claim its second kill.

"Captain please!" Kira could feel tears stinging his eyes, he was shedding the tears his captain refuses to shed, "Matsumoto-san..."

"Don'," comes the quite command, "And I ain't yer cap'n any more, Izuru. Ya shouldn' call me that. If anyone heard ya, they might think the wrong th'n," he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

"I don't care what anyone thinks!" declared Kira, "Captain, let me bring them. No one would object, especially not Captain Kyoraku!"

The unexpected mention of Captain Kyoraku's name garnered a reaction, Ichimaru turned to face his former vice-captain. They were in the Shrine of Penitence, the last cell of the condemned, "What's Captain eight got ta do with it?" he wondered.

It is then that it occurred to Kira that no one had bothered to tell Ichimaru what was to become of his children. A surge of anger shot through Kira's mind, but he quilled it. It is only to be expected given that Ichimaru had so far shown no interest in the days old infants. Being more pre-occupied with the death of their mother, "Captain Kyoraku has elected to adopt them," he did not add that he himself had begged and pleaded with them all to be allowed the guardianship of his captain's children. However, he never stood a chance. Not against Captain Kyoraku. Indeed Kira request, though heartfelt, was generally regarded as a non-issue and even somewhat selfish. After all, who was Kira Izuru compared to Captain Kyoraku Shunsei.

"He'll make a good father," stated Ichimaru sincerely, "Better than I would've been. They'll have Nanao too, of course. Ain't it funny, Izuru," he said, his trademark mocking grin firmly in place, "Rangiku survives the war, she survives have'n ta deal with me be'n back in Seireitei as a traitor condemned ta die. She even managed ta make peace with me and I..." his grin faltered and for a moment Kira could see the anguish of Ichimaru's soul clearly written on his face, "I didn' mean fer this ta happen. I didn' want 'er ta be alone. I didn' want 'er ta keep cry'n and... she was so happy when she found out she was pregnant. She always wanted a family. She had so much love in 'er. Captain Eleven always had me pegged. He always said me and Kaname were the only Shinigami who were afraid of dy'n. Don' know if we were the only ones but I was certainly afraid of dy'n. But seen 'er that happy I thought ta myself, well at least ya don' have ta worry about leav'n misery in yer wake. I knew she would always miss me, but... she wouldn' be lonely, she would always 'ave a piece of me like she wanted. But..." he turned his back to Kira again, resettling his gaze on the Sokyoku, "Well, I ain't afraid of dy'n no more."

Kira let his legs fold under him and all but collapsed on the ground. He felt as if his whole body had been hit by Wabisuke countless times. "If it is alright with you Captain," he said, his voice meek and exhausted, "I would like to stay here with you... till... till they come for you." Ichimaru did not reply, Kira took that as tacit consent and remained where he was, reflecting on how he had finally gotten the truth behind the smile over the past year...

* * *

_Exactly one year ago_

Ukitake and Kyoraku sat staring into their cups. Each deep in though regarding the Captains' meeting they both had to attend tomorrow, a meeting in which they would decide what was to become of the two traitors that survived the war. "They will be executed," said Ukitake, "there is no doubt about that. But the question is how? Traditionally, captains have always been executed during the Sokyoku."

"Though it's causing a hassle now but I can't say I regret destroying it," replied Kyoraku, smiling a little at the memory of his and Ukitake's dramatic destruction of the Sokyoku.

"Neither do I," Admitted Ukitake, "It is likely they will simply be beheaded by Yama-jii or burnt to ash by his shikai."

"Executing someone isn't the same as killing them in battle. Is Yama-jii really willing to do this?" wondered Kyoraku.

"We don't have a lot of choices. Soi Fon could use her zanpakuto and if ordered she wouldn't hesitate but that's not really any different than getting Yama-jii to execute them," commented Ukitake, "In fact, it might do more damage then good. That girl is too intense as it is."

Kyoraku nodded, "How do you think Hisagi-kun and Kamamura-kun will take Tosen's execution?"

"Hard to tell. They now grasp fully how Tosen had warped concepts and ideology to justify what was essentially his desire to take revenge against the world that took from him the woman he loved but at the end of the day he was still a mentor and Captain to one and a good friend to another," replied Ukitake, "But frankly I am more concerned about Matsumoto-kun and Kira-kun. Ichimaru... well it is simply remarkable the amount of love and devotion they have for him, despite the fact that he is the single coldest, creepiest bastard I know. I mean, Aizen wore a mask of warmth and kindness. Thus it was little surprised that many mourned his death and still refuse to believe that he was the man he was and that he did the things he did. But Ichimaru... it truly boggles the mind."

"I agree. I have also heard a... disturbing rumor," stated Kyoraku.

"Oh?"

"Yes, there is a rumor going around that Ichimaru had in fact secretly married Rangiku shortly after becoming captain. They hid it from everyone, the reasons that he gave her to get her to go along with it varies and really I can't see her going along with any of them. Than again, people have been known to do strange things for love and I know for a fact that girl loves him more then he ever deserved," said Kyoraku.

"That's a pretty outlandish rumor," commented Ukitake, "Can you imagine Rangiku keeping such a secret? I don't know her as well as you, of course, but what little of her I know makes me think she would be insulted at the mere suggestion."

Kyoraku nodded, "But as I said, people have been known to do strange things for love."

Silence. "Of course, in the end it doesn't matter. Ichimaru Gin and Tosen Kaname will die one way or another soon enough and if anyone sheds any tears for them, they should count themselves lucky because neither deserve it. Least of all Ichimaru Gin, who followed not because he believed he was doing the right thing but even though he knew he was doing the wrong thing," stated Ukitake.

"You are of course right. This is all... such a sad story," lamented Kyoraku as he returned his attention to his sake cup.

* * *

**Author's note:** Thanks for reading and reviews are much appreciated!


	2. Chapter 2

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_50 years after the execution_

It still felt alien: the third squad's Captain's haori. Kira doubted it would ever sit comfortably on his shoulders. He will forever feel as if he was doing something wrong, wearing Ichimaru's haori behind his back. He would forever be waiting for Ichimaru to just walk-in and teasingly chide him for trying on the haori, possibly set him some tedious tasks as punishment. But Ichimaru Gin was gone and the only part of him that remained were contained in his children. Aging was a strange concept in Soul Society. It was not consistent and linked more to emotional and spiritual development then the passage of time. So it was that in the past fifty years Yachiru, who had finally grown tired of Zaraki Kenpachi's shoulder, had aged into a fully grown woman. But his captain's two children had barely made the transition from toddlers to children. He saw them often, running around the squad buildings, playing with various members of squad one or nestled in the arms of Nanao. Sometimes he saw them with Captain-commander Kyoraku, who was indeed a good father to the children. Yet...

They knew who their mother was. Nanao took them to visit Matsumoto's grave often enough. But Kira knew for certain neither children were aware that Captain-commander Kyoraku was only their adopted father. It was not that anyone had lied to them. Just that no one had told the children anything different and had merely allowed the children to assume what was natural for them to assume. The only person who saw something wrong with it was Kira and from him the children were carefully kept. Not that Kira would ever tell them anything that would upset them. How could he? The children were happy and he would never do anything to ruin that. The pain he felt every time little Rangiku looked at him with those ice blue eyes the belonged to his captain, set in the face of the woman his captain had loved was his to bear in silence. As was the sheer agony that he experienced every time he laid eyes on little Shunsui. He was the very incarnation of Ichimaru Gin, right down to the smirk and the all but closed eyes. He didn't have Gin's accent of course. Kira was extremely grateful for that and focused on it every time he met the boy. Kira was sure he would go mad with grief and longing otherwise.

Why couldn't he get over his captain? It had after all been so long. Why was he still mourning? Still missing Ichimaru Gin? Kira didn't really understand. Perhaps it was just his personality. His introspective personality that made him hold on to his grief and loss much longer than other people would have. Or perhaps Ichimaru Gin was just impossible to get over.

* * *

_1 year before the execution_

"The two surviving traitors are being kept in the special cells of Squad 1," Captain Commander Yamamoto informed the assembled captains, "There they shall remain till their execution. As you are all aware, the Sokyoku was the traditional method of executing captain level shinigami," Yamamoto shot a meaningful glance at Ukitake and Kyoraku, "But of course the Sokyoku has been destroyed." Both Ukitake and Kyoraku managed to look back with admirably innocent looks, much to the Captain commander's annoyance.

"So how are we to execute the traitors?" wondered Hitsugaya.

"Using the Sokyoku," replied Yamamoto, "After careful thought I have decided that it is better for us to wait for the Sokyoku to be rebuilt. It will take the Shihoin Clan one year to rebuild the Sokyoku. We shall wait a year. During that year the prisoners will be kept where they are. Access to the prisoners will be strictly restricted to captain and vice-captain level shinigami. All menial tasks are to be performed in the presence of a vice-captain or captain. I understand this may cause you some inconvenience but these are two very charismatic, very cunning men. I do not want to have to execute any more shinigami for treason. Which is why I have had them placed in the special cells."

"Forgive me my ignorance, Captain commander," said Hitsugaya, "But I have never heard of these special cells."

"The special cells are rooms built deep underground, below squad 1 barracks, made of Sekkiseki. The rooms are designed for long term confinement of highly dangerous prisoners. The doors to these rooms can only be opened by utilizing a zanpakuto as a key. So far I have granted only my zanpakuto, Captain Unohana's zanpakuto and those of our vice-captains access. The one whose zanpakuto is attuned to the room retains all power inside it, everybody else is deprived of all reiryoku. The prisoners themselves are also attuned to the room and cannot leave it unless the room is opened by the master zanpakuto, my zanpakuto."

"Captain commander, I would like to request access to Tosen Kaname for myself and vice-captain Hisagi Shuhei," said Captain Komamura, "I wish to talk to Tosen and I am sure so would Vice-captain Hisagi."

"Granted."

"I would like to request access to Ichimaru Gin for Vice-captain Matsumoto and Vice-captain Kira," said Hitsugaya, "They too need to make peace with Ichimaru before he is put to death."

There was a considerable pause before Yamamoto spoke, "Given that both Vice-captain Matsumoto and Vice-captain Kira have shown their loyalty to the Gotei 13 and Soul Society at large countless times during the war, it would be an insult to not grant your request. However, I fear I may come to regret this decision. Ichimaru Gin is a far more dangerous man than Tosen Kaname in more ways than one."

* * *

She stared at herself in the mirror. Wondering why she hadn't stopped wearing it, the silver chain he had given her, so, so long ago. She should take it off. She should have taken it off when his trechery was revealed. But she had not. Why? Because she would feel naked without it. It was a near synonymous part of her, she couldn't get rid of it. Much like him. After all, she would have been dead had he not come along. She wouldn't be here, if Ichimaru Gin had never come into her life. She would never be free of him and the chain around her neck was merely a visual representation of the state of her soul. But chained to him though she maybe forever she would not give in and go see him. No, she had nothing to say to him. No explanation to demand. He had done what he had done and she did not particularly care why. He had hurt her, hurt her friends, hurt the very things they had sworn to protect. She did not want to listen to excuses and reasons. The point was that he shouldn't have done it. No, she would not go see him, not till she was forced to attend his execution as the dutiful vice-captain of squad ten. It was very kind and thoughtful of her captain to get her access to him but it was unnecessary. She wanted nothing to do with him anymore.

* * *

He came everyday and stood in front of the closed door. His hand on the hilt of his zanpakuto. He truly didn't know what he wanted to do. A part of him wanted to turn around and go back to squad three, to his daily duties, to his friends, to his life. Another part of him wanted to open the door... but what would he do after he opened the door? He did not know. For seven days he gave in the part that told him to turn away. On the eight, he opened the door and went inside.

The room was frigidly cold and contained one bed, one desk and a chair. Ichimaru was at the desk when Kira came in, he seemed to be reading something by the light of the small lamp that sat on the desk, "So ya finally decided ta come in, Izuru," he said, not turning around. But then what could be more appropriate, Kira had spent more time staring at the back of Ichimaru's head.

"You sensed me," whispered Kira.

"Yep, this room messes with my sense but I can still feel ya and Rangiku. I don't suppose she is gonna come visit me anytime soon?"

"No, Matsumoto-san has said she doesn't want anything more to do with you."

"I can't really blame 'er. Suppose I'll just have ta see 'er when they execute me, which will be good enough fer me. It ain't like I can forget 'er between now and then. Just as long as I get ta see 'er one last time... ain't got nothing else ta look forward ta now."

"You do realize that she almost died in the war," responded Kira angrily, "You didn't seem to be too concerned whether she lived or died then!"

"Cause I cared. I never wanted 'er to get hurt. Never wanted 'er to die. I was hope'n she would hold on ta me, when the Negación came down... didn't happen. Then I hoped that she would just survive the war and..."

"And what! If you won, she would just go back to you! You think she would have forgiven you the death of all her friends, her captain? If you think that then you truly don't know her."

"I know 'er, Izuru. I know 'er better then she knows 'erself. She would never forgive me. Never. But she would stay with me. A part of 'er would hate me, a part of 'er would hate 'erself but she would stay with me," the conviction in his voice was absolute.

"That does not sound like much of a life."

"Ya were born here weren't ya, Izuru. Yer family is nobility, ain't they," they were statements of facts, Ichimaru knew full well Kira's family history.

"Minor nobility but..."

"Yer still a noble. Ya had a hard life compared ta most folks around here that's true but me and Rangiku... Ya would be surprised what our definition of a good life is."

Kira closed his eyes and asked the question that had been haunting him ever since he found out his captain was a traitor, "Why?" That one word was ladened with so many meanings, so many layers.

Silence. "Yer a smart boy Izuru, figure it out," and that, Kira realized, was all the answer he was ever going to get out of Ichimaru Gin.

* * *

**Author's note:** Hmm... this fic is actually harder to write then I though it would be. Hope you guys like it. Also, the whole Rangiku's silver chain being a gift form Gin is from my story September. Thanks for reading, reviews are much appreciated.


	3. Chapter 3

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_11 months before the execution_

She was collapsing in on herself. She worked, keeping conversation to a minimum. Then at the end of the day she went to her room and drank till she passed out. This was an unnatural state of being for Matsumoto Rangiku. She tried to avoid work, took every opportunity to start a conversation or sneak out to hang out with her friends. She also as a rule preferred drinking in groups, where the groups included men such as Hisagi, Kyoraku and Iba who tried to out do each other in treating her to drinks. It was obvious what was happening. With the end of the war she had nothing to keep her going. Her duty was done. Soul Society was safe. There was no longer a state of emergency. It was no longer necessary for her to hold herself together. She could do whatever she wanted now. Including drinking herself stupid...

There was a knock on her door. She ignored it. She didn't want visitors, especially not one of her well meaning friends. She just wanted to be left alone. "Matsumoto-san, I know you are in there," came Kira's voice, "I'll wait here all night if I have to. But I would like very much to talk to you."

"About what?" asked Matsumoto.

"About... about..." he couldn't do it. He couldn't say Ichimaru Gin but Ichimaru Gin no longer deserved to be called captain, "About _him_. I want to talk about him."

"I don't have anything to say about him," declared Matsumoto.

"Please, Matsumoto-san, I want to know what he was like before. Before he joined the Gotei 13. Before he met Aizen Sosuke," begged Kira.

"Why?" wondered Matsumoto, "What does it matter?"

"I think it does, Matsumoto-san. I think his entire life has lead him to were he is and I want to know why. He's not giving me any answers but I hoped talking to you might get me some," explained Kira.

Silence. Then he heard stumbling footsteps as the door opened, "Just to be clear, I am doing this because you want to know. Not because I want to talk about him."

"I understand, Matsumoto-san," replied Kira, "Thank you."

* * *

You know I don't remember the actual day of my birth. Gin was the first person to ever ask me when my birthday was. When I told him I didn't know, he made the day we met my birthday. It was fitting because my life after that day was nothing like it was before. You see, I don't remember much about my life before he came into it. I didn't count days till I met him. Time had no meaning and the days flew together in a blur. I knew I was different because I hungered. It was like curse that made my life that much harder. One day my hard life came to an end. I don't even remember how I survived up until then. I just had. Then one day... I just couldn't go on. I found myself lying on a dirt road, just watching the world go on around me, waiting, just waiting to take my last breath... then he came.

"Eat up," he said, as he held a piece of fruit to my lips, "If ya can collapse due ta hunger, then ya must have spiritual power," he informed me.

"You... too..." I wondered.

"Yep. Me, too. Ichimaru Gin, nice ta meet ya."

"Gin... that's a weird name."

His smile widened, "It's after my hair, at least I think. Don' have anyone I can ask ya know," he said, "Now eat!" I took a bite and chewed slowly, it was painfully to swallow. He sighed, "Yer gonna be a handful ain't ya," with that he sat down next to me and slowly fed me, "What's yer name?"

"Matsumoto Rangiku."

"Rangiku... that's a nice name," he said, "So wha' ya do'n here all alone?"

"I am always alone..." he didn't reply, just continued to feed me till I was strong enough to sit up and take the food into my own hands.

"If ya got no place ta go, ya can come with me. I ain't got much, but I wouldn't mind share'n with ya," he told me.

"Really?" I said, feeling the entirely alien sensation of happiness.

"Yep. Ya ain't trash and ya are the most beautiful thing I have seen around here. I can' leave ya alone, ya would just get hurt and it'll all end up being a sad story and I hate sad stories," he told me, before taking my hand and leading me to the small shack that ended up being my home as well as his.

Not that he was always there. He would disappear for days on end, sometimes weeks and he would never tell me where he was going. First time it happened... I was so worried. I searched everywhere I could for him. For three days I looked everywhere I could walk in the space of a day, for three nights I waited up for him outside our door. On the dawn of the fourth day he came back with the rising sun on his back. He chided me for not taking care of myself and for worrying unnecessarily.

"I can take care of myself, Rangiku," he told me, "An I ain't gonna leave ya. Don' worry and don' make me worry. Ya don' have ta look fer me. I'll always come back and ya don' have ta wait up fer me. Sleep! It'll make the time pass quicker and before long, I'll be back with ya."

Ever wondered why I sleep so much? It's not because I am lazy, well that's part of it. But every time I sleep, there is a chance that I'll wake up in his arms... well there used to be chance that I would wake up in his arms....

* * *

She fell silent. Lost in her thoughts as Kira digested her story. Finally Kira broke the silence, "What did he mean? When he said you weren't trash?"

"I didn't understand it at the time. I didn't comprehend for a long, long time. But one day... Gin rarely took me with him on his trips. The few times he did, we went to a market town that was about two days journey from where we lived. Every time we went he would hold on to my hand so tightly... but one day, one day we lost each other in the crowd. As I frantically looked for him I ran into a group of children who were struggling against a group of men, screaming for them to let them go. It's wasn't the kind of thing I could ignore. So I jumped in, not that I had great control over it but I could manifest a pretty decent ball of spirit energy and could lob it rather well too. It was enough to scare off the men and enough to tell Gin where I was. He came running and as soon as he did, he grabbed my hand and started pulling me away. But the other children grabbed my other hand and started to thank me for saving them..."

* * *

"Thank you! If you weren't here, they would have taken us to the house," I think there were about three of them, two boys and a girl and I think it was the girl who did most of the talking. I can't remember too clearly.

"The house?" I asked her.

"Ya don' have ta know about the house," Gin cut in, "It ain't ya place ya gonna end up in. I'll make sure of that."

"You should stay with us, the more of us there are the less they bother us."

"What do you think Gin?" I kind of wanted to stay, I had never had any friends before. Gin was all I had and I thought that maybe if I was with other people, I wouldn't feel the crushing loneliness I felt when he wasn't there.

"They are trash Rangiku and more trash piled together ain't gonna keep 'em any safer. They want ya cause you ain't trash. Ya can protect them and if ya can't... ya are so much prettier, they'll go fer ya first and give these trash time ta escape. They just wanna use ya. We ain't staying with 'em, ya ain't staying with 'em. I'll take ya back home even if I have ta drag ya," I had never seen this part of Gin before. The hard edge in his voice, the dangerous and dark look on his face... the children started to protest but one look from him and the words just died in their throats, just like they died in mine. "We're leave'n," with that he led me out of the town, "Don' ever come here without me, Rangiku. Ever."

* * *

"And I never did. Till..." a dark cloud passed over Rangiku's face.

"Till?" prompted Kira, though look on her face made him think twice about pushing.

"Shortly before we entered the Shinigami Academy... he was absent for close to three weeks. It was the longest he had been absent. I couldn't help worrying. I thought he might be in the town. You see, he always returned from his trips with food, cloths and other things we needed. I don't know how he would get them. He never answered me when I asked but more then once I found blood on his yukata, which made me think I probably didn't want to know. But many of the shop keepers in the town knew him, so I figured that maybe one of them could tell me where he was or might have seen him more recently then I had..." Rangiku fell silent, she seemed to be growing increasingly reluctant to speak.

"What happened, Rangiku?" wondered Kira, though he was not entirely sure he wanted to force her to talk more.

"You are a smart boy, Kira. Figure it out," she said a slight note of irritation in her voice, "Not that it mattered. Before anything happened, Gin came and got me... even back then he was a rather frighteningly powerful person. They never stood a chance. But he was hurt badly, I don't know who hurt him. He wouldn't tell me but shortly after he took me with him to join the Shinigami Academy. After we joined he all but ignored me during the day, immersing himself in his studies like a man possessed, coming to me only at night. He graduated within a year, top of his class in everything. He was instantly accepted into the Gotei 13. He had his pick of squads but for some reason he choose squad five."

She closed her eyes as if to fight back tears as she recalled a painful memory, "He didn't come see me after he joined. The one time I saw him was while me and some of the other girls from the Academy were visiting some of the shops in Seireitei, he addressed me as Matsumoto-san when I went upto him. I was so hurt! I just turned and ran. Ran back to my room and stayed there for the rest of the day and the entire night, crying. I missed classes the next day, too depressed to even leave my bed. I would have drunk myself stupid if I could afford it. The third day after the incident I started to force myself to go about my daily business. What's the point, I said to myself, of pining over him. You knew he would leave you one day. You were never good enough to hold onto him forever. But then... just as I thought I was getting over him, I woke to find him in my bed, arms wrapped tightly around me. I was so angry, so annoyed, so hurt. I screamed and cried and hit him as hard as I could. He didn't respond, just kept me in his vice like grip till I had expanded all my venom and then he kissed me and I let him. I let him pull me back in and I knew there would never be any escape for me. I was his forever, whether he was there or not, whether he was alive or dead. Since they day I ate of the fruit he offered, I was damned," there was such finality in her voice, it frightened Kira.

"Matsumoto-san..."

"I would like to sleep now, Kira, I am... really tired. Tired of it all," she whispered, there were layers of meaning behind her words that Kira couldn't begin to fathom.

"Of course, thank you Matsumoto-san. Thank you and good night," with that Kira left, but Matsumoto didn't go to sleep. She picked up her sake cup and drank, she drank till she passed out and slipped into a dreamless slumber.

* * *

**Author's note:** Thanks for reading!


	4. Chapter 4

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_50 years after the execution_

"Rangiku! Shunsui!" Called Nanao, "Where are those two hiding?" she wondered.

"Problem Ise-san," wondered Kira as he walked up to her.

"No, just can't find Rangiku and Shunsui," she told him.

"I think I saw them down by the fountain near squad seven, shall we go have a look?" asked Kira, pleasantly enough. Nanao nodded absently and they headed to the fountain.

They found the children playing with two large stuffed dolls. One was a large silver fox and the other a large silver snake, "Rangiku! Shunsui! Come here this instant! You are late for your lessons!"

"Sorry Nanao-san," they said in unison, as they ran to her, "Good morning Captain Kira," they said, when they spotted Kira.

"Good morning children," greeted Kira, keeping his eyes on Rangiku who was clutching the fox, "That's an nice doll you have there."

"His name is Gin," said Rangiku, the blood drained from Nanao's face at the unexpected mention of _his_ name, "He belonged to mommy! We found him and Ichimaru," she pointed to the snake in little Shunsui's arms, "Among mommy's old stuff last night."

"How... how do you know that's what their names are?" wondered Nanao, fighting her instinct to just grab the dolls and waste them in flash of kido flame.

"That's what was written on them," said Shunsui as he pointed to a neat little embroidery on the tail end of the snake that spelled Ichimaru, as Rangiku pointedly held up a paw of the fox that had the word Gin embroidered on it, "But Nanao-san, one thing that confuses me is why would mommy name her dolls after that traitor Ichimaru Gin?" wondered the boy.

"What... what makes you think that she named them after Ichimaru Gin?" asked Nanao.

"I don't know, I mean, Ichimaru Gin isn't exactly a common name and I heard some people say he and mommy where in the Academy together," Shunsui explained, "Were they friends or something?"

Nanao didn't respond, struggling with what to say. Kira spared her the need to answer, "They were friends," he whispered, forcing himself to look at the boy, his captain in miniature both in looks and clearly also in brains, "They were friends both before and after the Academy. It was only natural for her to name her dolls after her good friend. Especially a snake and a fox, you see we never did settle the debate about whether Captain Ichimaru was a cold blooded snake or a very clever kitsune..."

* * *

_11 months before the execution_

From her perspective it wasn't all that sudden. She had been thinking about nothing else for the last hour. However, her companions who had not been privy to her thought process had a totally different perspective. One moment Ise Nanao was quietly sipping her tea lost in thought, the next moment she abruptly stood up muttering to herself, "And I have had it with her!" Before the other girls of the Shinigami Women's association could say anything she was out the door.

"What... what just happened?" wondered Hinamori.

"Looks like Nana's going to go talk to Ran-chan," said Yachiru.

"About time," commented Soifon, "I have half a mind to pummel some sense into that idiot myself. Why the hell she insists on drinking herself stupid over that treacherous snake is beyond me."

"Ran-chan loves Foxy," said Yachiru as if that statement alone was enough of a rebuttal to Soifon's point of view.

Before Soifon could form a reply Isane interjected, "Be that as it may. The fact remains that Ichimaur Gin is condemned to die and if things don't change then Rangiku-san will follow him into the grave because as things stand now, it's more that she is drinking herself to death."

"Isn't there something we can do," wondered Nemu, "I have heard of practices called 'interventions' that take place in the real world."

"Interventions? What are those Nemu-san?" asked Hinamori.

"I believe an intervention involves a person's friends and family trying to persuade them to seek help for some problem. In Vice-captain Matsumoto's case our primary goal would be to get her to stop drinking so much and to convince her to get some help regarding her spiraling depression. After all, it is clear that she is drinking because she is depressed, clinically even," she glanced at Isane for confirmation, who nodded.

"Let Nana try," said Yachiru, "If she fails, we can all pummel sense into Ran-chan!"

* * *

"Rangiku open up!" Nanao yelled as she banged hard on the door. Rangiku ignored it, like Nanao knew she would, "Enough is enough, Rangiku!" with that Nanao blasted the door open with a Kido spell.

Rangiku jumped up, "What the hell are you doing, Nanao!" she screamed.

"That's my line," said Nanao, "What the hell do you think you are doing!" she demanded as she snatched the sake bottle out of Rangiku's hand and smashed it against the nearest wall.

"Hey! I was drinking that!"

"Exactly!" screamed Nanao, "He's a monster! And you know he is! One thing I'll give you is that you have never been blind to his faults. You have never made excuses for him. Never said idiotic things like, oh he's just misunderstood or he's not as bad as people think he is. You have known what he is but I doubt even you could have imagined that he was capable of doing the things we found out he did. I mean, he helped Aizen hollowfy Lisa! He was the reason we lost all those captains, vice-captains back then! He helped Aizen bring that hollow that caused Shiba Kaien's death into soul society! He helped Aizen make and send those huge hollows that gave Hisagi those scars! He helped Aizen try and kill Hinamori! He helped Aizen create those monsters that nearly killed us all! He fought against us and he has not shown an ounce of remorse! Not an ounce and..."

"I know those things!" Rangiku interrupted, "I know all those things but..."

"But what!" cried Nanao, "Why are you doing this? Why are you slowly poisoning yourself with these..." she picked up the nearest sake bottle and smashed it on the floor, "Why Rangiku? Why do you still love that grinning devil?"

"Because..." whispered Rangiku, "He is the devil and I ate of his fruit."

"Rangiku!"

"I don't have anyone else, Nanao!" Rangiku cried, "I was alone before I met him and I'll be alone once he leaves me! I don't want to be alone," tears welled up in her eyes but Nanao's gaze was unsympathetic.

"You fool! What about us? What about me? Captain Kyoraku? Captain Hitsugaya? What about Hisagi and the other girls? Are we nothing to you? Do you think we don't care? Do you have any comprehension how painful it is to watch someone you care about slowly destroy themselves? But you should know. Shouldn't you? Ichimaru did it. He destroyed himself and now you are destroying yourself!" cried Nanao, "Perhaps," her voice dropped to a whisper, "Perhaps you two are meant for each other. You both have a talent for spreading misery," with that Nanao turned away and left, but not before Rangiku had spotted the tears in her eyes.

* * *

He stood in the center of the room, waiting for her, "So ya decided ta come visit me after all," he said when she entered the room, grinning widely, "I am glad. Thought I might not see ya till the big day."

She looked extremely tired but strangely at peace. There was a small smile on her lips as she closed the door behind her, "You sensed me coming."

"Ya and Izuru are the only people I can sense from in 'ere," he explained, "So I try 'n keep tabs on ya. Ain't much else ta do here. Cap'n Unohana brought me some books but read'n about people ain't half as fun as observ'n 'em. I miss my strolls."

"You would," agreed Rangiku, as she made her way to him. She gently laid a hand on his chest as she whispered, "I missed you," with that she laid her head on his chest and pressed her body against him.

His arms came up automatically to encircle her, "This is a surprise," he whispered as he planted a soft kiss on her head, "I thought ya would be angry with me, Rangiku."

"Anger is not an emotion I want to feel right now," whispered Rangiku, "I don't want to feel anything negative from here on out."

Something wasn't right, "Rangiku, what ya mean by that? What ya do?"

Rangiku pulled away slightly and looked up, she was still smiling, "I can't do this any more. I can't keep hurting my friends but I know I can't live without my silver fox. But wallowing in my misery and slowly wasting away isn't fair on the people who care about me. So I decided to end it quickly."

Gin eyes flew open as comprehension hit him, "Ya poisoned yerself!"

She nodded, "I think it's for the best, at the very least I won't have to feel the pain of your death..." but Gin wasn't listening, as soon as she had nodded, Gin sprinted to the door and started banging on it hard.

"Hey, anyone there! Please help!"

"It's no use," whispered Rangiku, the poison making her limbs weak she slowly sank to the floor, "There isn't anyone down here this time of the night."

"Rangiku! Please! Please open this door!" begged Gin, as he effortlessly lifted her up into his arms and brought her to the door, "Please!"

"Gin, please," whispered Rangiku, "I don't have much time left, just... just hold me."

Letting out an indescribable sound Gin resumed pounding on the door even as he held Rangiku close, he could feel her life force draining away, "Help! Please! Someone! Anyone! Help!"

Fortunately, at that precise moment Hisagi Shuhei and Captain Komamura were leaving the cell of Tosen Kaname, "What's the meaning of this, Ichimaru?" demanded Komamura from the other side of the door.

"Komamura-san! Rangiku's tired ta kill 'erself. She's in 'ere, she drank some sorta poison. If ya don' get 'er ta Cap'n Unohana soon, she'll die!" explained Ichimaru.

"What!" came Hisagi's shocked cry.

"Hisagi, go and get Captain Unohana," ordered Komamura, "Ichimaru, my zanpakuto does not have authority to open your cell. You will have to get her to open the door."

Ichimaru didn't bother asking Rangiku again, unsheathing Haineko he guided Rangiku's hands to it's hilt and forced her to clutch it, "Gin... don't..." she whispered, but like always he did not listen to her. He made her stab the zanpakuto on the key sloth and the door flew open, Komamura reached across the threshold and took her from him. Without another word, he turned and run, honing in on Captain Unohana's reitsu and hoping to meet her sooner by meeting her half-way.

The door remained open, Haineko remained embedded in the key slot. Tentatively Gin put his hand out, only to be given a sharp jolt by the rooms special barrier. After all, the door to the cell was not designed to keep prisoners in, it was to keep unwanted guests out. The entire room acted to keep the prisoners in prison. He stared at the slight burn on his fingers as if he was not sure how it had got there, "Don' die, Rangiku," he whispered, still staring compulsively at his fingers, "Please don' die."

* * *

**Author's note:** The fox and the snake dolls are from my fic Fox or Snake. I am not sure about this chapter. I hope it comes across well. The other way I though of writing this chapter had Rangiku confront Gin about the stuff he's don. Gin doesn't respond just keeps grinning and Rangiku loses it and attacks him with Haineko, cutting him. When she sees the blood she breaks down crying and they end the chapter kissing... kind of sounded really cheesy and stupid to me. So I decided to go with Rangiku, who I had been portraying as being super depressed over the last couple of chapters, going over the edge over something small as seeing Nanao crying. Made more sense to me. Hmm... I wonder if I have to up the rating on this fic...


	5. Chapter 5

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_50 years after the execution_

Shunsui got over Ichimaru the snake pretty quickly, but Gin the fox soon became Rangiku's all time favorite doll! She took it with her everywhere. She took it with her when she attended reading and writing lessons. She took it with her to Kido practice, to kendo practice and she was clutching it firmly in her arms when she went to visit her favorite captain in all of Gotei 13, Captain Hisagi of the ninth division. When she got there she found Captain Hisagi talking to a pretty girl she hadn't seen before. Rangiku narrowed her eyes at the girl and quickly decided she didn't like her. She ran upto Hisagi and pulled on his hakame to get his attention, "Well if it isn't my favorite girl!" cried Hisagi as he picked Rangiku up. The woman he was talking to quickly excused herself and left.

"Who's she?" demanded Rangiku, glaring at the woman's back.

"O, that was my new 4th Seat," said Hisagi, "She just transferred in from Squad 7."

"Do you like her?"

"Well she seems nice enough," said Hisagi.

"No! I mean, do you like, like her?" demanded Rangiku.

Hisagi blinked and then howled with laughter, "No, I don't like, like her."

"Good," said Rangiku smiling her mother's smile, "Because you are mine!" she informed him before cuddling into his chest.

For a moment Hisagi was lost for words, for a moment Hisagi looked down at the girl in his arms and could only think of the woman who had been her mother. The woman, whom he had loved in-vain because she had always belonged to another. She had always belonged to the silver fox. But this girl didn't belong to the fox. Rather the silver fox belonged to her, even if it was the stuffed variety. "Yes," Hisagi found himself saying, "I am yours. I am always yours," even Hisagi couldn't have said which Rangiku he was addressing that to.

* * *

_11 months before the execution_

If Hisagi Shuuhei needed another reason to hate Ichimaru Gin, he got it as he watched Rangiku struggle against Captain Komamura's grasp as Captain Unohana tried to heal her. "No, please don't. Just let me die," she whispered, her voice failing as the poison took effect.

They couldn't knock her out for fear of worsening the effects of the poison but trying to heal her when she was trashing wasn't easy either, "Enough!" commanded Captain Unohana, "Vice-captain Matsumoto be still, that's an order."

Perhaps it was the good soldier in her or perhaps it was simply that the poison had finally reached a point where she could no longer move because Matsumoto stopped trashing. The torrent of tears, however, flowed on, "Hisagi," Captain Komamura addressed him, "Please go inform Captain Hitsugaya of what has happened."

Though he was reluctant to leave her side, Hisagi was a good soldier too, "Yes, Captain Komamura," with that he left. Cursing again the name of Ichimaru Gin and praying to every god he could think of and begging them to keep Matsumoto alive.

* * *

They had her committed to the psychiatric wing of the Sougou Kyuugo Tsumesho and put on suicide watch. Her friends had constant access to her but she was not allowed out, not that she had any place to go anyway, not after they revoked her access to Gin's cell.

"Inoue Orihime sent some bean paste sweets for you from the living world," said Nanao as she gave the sweets to Rangiku.

"Does she know..." wondered Rangiku, her voice weak and exhausted.

"No, not yet," assured Nanao, "No one has really gone to the living world recently. Both Abarai and Kuchiki are terribly busy with their duties, so they haven't visited the living world in months. Ichigo hasn't been by for even longer. I guess he is busy with his life in general. Inoue just sent over some gifts for her friends with Kurumadani Zennosuke, when he returned after the end of his deployment. She sent some candy for Yachiru, some rabbit themed accessories for Kuchiki and some very fancy sunglasses for Abarai. She also sent something for Captain Hitsugaya but he refuses to tell anyone what it it."

Rangiku managed a small smile as she said, "I bet it's a Kitsue DVDs, captain took a fancy to it while we were over there."

"Kitsue?"

"It's a children's cartoon," explained Rangiku.

"Oh!" exclaimed Nanao, smiling slightly, "I see, so that's how it is. No wonder he is not owning up to them."

Rangiku sighed, "Captain... captain must be over-worked and you must have been so worried. I have been a terrible burden haven't I? I just can't stop hurting the people around me."

"Its alright!" assured Nanao, clasping Rangiku's hand with both of hers, "We are all just worried about you and we worry because we care. You are not alone Rangiku! You'll never be alone! And please, please don't for a moment think that dying will stop us from being hurt. It'll hurt us more and we'll always miss you."

Tears ran down Rangiku's face. She was crying a lot lately, "I am sorry," she whispered, she did not specify what she was sorry for but Nanao had a fair idea that Rangiku was sorry for a great many things. She was sorry for making her friends worry, she was sorry for all the trouble she was causing but most of all she was sorry that even now she could think of nothing but Ichimaru Gin.

* * *

"I wanna see 'er," said Ichimaru to Captain Unohana as she stood by while couple of her 4th squad members did the various chores around the cell.

"Vice-captain Matsumoto is in a very fragile mental state that I doubt would be improved by a visit to you," replied Captain Unohana simply.

"I am the only thing that can help 'er," asserted Ichimaru, "She's pine'n away fer me. Let 'er come ta me and she'll start get'n better."

"That is hardly a permanent solution or any solution at all," stated Captain Unohana calmly, "She is depressed because you are condemned to die. I am not sure spending more time with you is going to reconcile her to that fact."

"Keep'n 'er away from me ain't gonna do that either," countered Ichimaru, "She and I... have a lot a unfinished business. Let... let us make peace before I die and she'll be able ta move on after I am gone."

"Do you really believe that's possible, Ichimaru?" asked Captain Unohana sincerely, "Do you really believe that a woman to whom you have been a best friend, only lover and the closest thing to a family she has ever known can ever truly 'move on'?"

"Lemme me re-phrase," said Ichimaru grinning a particular wide grin, "She ain't ever gonna be what she was before after I am gone. But if ya let us make things up, she might be in a state after I am gone that'll let her live on." Unohana shot him a skeptical look, Ichimaru sighed, "Look, I ain't gonna deny being a sadist. But I have never wanted ta hurt Rangiku, I..." even now the word love refused to escape his lips, "I don' want 'er ta follow me to the grave," he said sincerely.

After a moment's consideration Captain Unohana replied, "I will consider your request with reference to how Vice-captain fairs over the next few weeks."

"Thanks," whispered Ichimaru, "Ya always were my second favorite cap'n."

"Let me guess, Aizen was the first," said Unohana indifferently, not really believing him.

"Nay, Captain eleven was the first," replied Ichimaru, "Cap'n Aizen... I knew him too well to have him as a favorite."

That was what Kira heard as he walked into the room carrying a large box full of mechanical puzzles, "Forgive my intrusion, but when I went to visit Matsumoto-san earlier she told me you were bored," he said, turning to Ichimaru, "And asked me to see if I could bring you some things to occupy you. So I thought I would bring you, your collection of puzzles."

"Well ain't that thoughtful of Rangiku and ya too, Izuru," said Ichimaru as he took the box from Kira, "Thanks Izuru, thanks for bringing me 110 years of presents from Cap'n Aizen," much to Ichimaru's disappointment, Kira betrays no reaction, "Ya knew they were from 'im?"

"Yes," admits Kira, "Hinamori-kun told me that every year on your birthday you would go see him at midnight and he would give you a puzzle that you would solve then and there before leaving."

"I see," said Ichimaru, feeling a little let down. He was hoping to get more of a reaction from Kira, "Yet ya still brought them ta me."

"I do not see the logic behind holding those puzzles in contempt just because the man who gave them and the man who received them both turned out to be traitors," answered Kira, feeling a little awkward having this conversation in front of Captain Unohana and the two squad four shinigami. Ichimaru did not reply.

"You must like puzzle very much for Aizen to give you the same gift every year," commented Unohana, more to break the awkward silence then anything else.

"I don' mind 'em," said Ichimaru, "But like's too strong a word. I always found 'em a bit too easy ta solve."

Kira blinked, "Then why..."

"Metaphors, Izuru. Cap'n Aizen was very big on metaphors," explained Ichimaru.

"What..." began Kira.

Ichimaru's grin widened to inhuman proportions, "Yer a smart kid, Izuru, figure it out."

* * *

"Did you bring me anything to drink, Shuuhei?" asked Matsumoto, plastering the biggest grin she could master on her face.

"You are not allowed to drink, Rangiku-san," said Hisagi softly, as he sat down on the visitor's chair, wondering how she could possibly manage to look so beautiful even in her current state.

She pouted, "That makes me sad, I was not meant to be sober."

"I can't imagine you have had a lot of fun drinking recently, all by yourself, cooped up in your room," he stated.

Rangiku sighed, "I was trying to get used to loneliness but then I remembered how miserable I was while I was alone and why I didn't fight to survive."

"I don't understand."

"You're from Rukongai, aren't you?" Hisagi nodded, "What's the worst thing you have ever eaten? You know, while you are out there?"

"Worst thing I have ever eaten..." Hisagi thought for a minute, "I can't really say..."

"I take it the district you were in was pretty nice," said Rangiku smiling.

"I guess it was. I mean," he touched the 69 tattoo on his face, "My childhood wasn't free of incidents, as it turns out Tosen and Aizen were the ones who caused at least one of those incidents. But my district had plenty of fruit trees on communal land, people generally helped each other out. So I don't ever recall starving."

"We did," said Rangiku, looking sad and exhausted, "Gin and I. Most of the time we did alright. But every now and again... there was nothing Gin wouldn't eat to survive. Garbage, rats, mice; his will to survive was phenomenal. I never had that. Never. I would have died if he hadn't found me and I don't just mean that because I had collapsed from hunger when he found me. When things got tough and we had to survive on the most disgusting things... I would refuse to eat sometimes. Refuse to put another bit of rat flesh in my mouth. Refuse to swallow another cockroach. I would tell him to just leave me be and let me just die in peace. He wouldn't, of course. He never listened to me. He would kiss me, coax me and feed me so that I would survive. I didn't live long enough to join the Gotei 13 because I had a burning desire to live, I lived long enough to join the Gotei 13 because he had a burning desire that I live."

Hisagi's heart ached from the knowledge that he could not make a reply to what Rangiku had said. That unlike Ichimaru, he would not be able to kiss her and coax her into living. How do you go about replacing a person who meant so much? Hisagi didn't know. All he knew was he didn't want her to die, "Please," he found himself whispering, "Please don't give-up. Please!"

Silence. "I honestly don't remember how not to give-up."

* * *

When Hisagi finally left Matsumoto, he found himself emotionally drained. Slowly but surely she was wasting away and there was nothing he could do about it. The feeling of helplessness... he remembered the fight in Karakura Town when Matsumoto had, had much of her lower abdomen ripped out by that monster. He had tried to fight the monster, had tried to buy Kira time to heal her but in the end he had failed. He had needed rescuing, he had needed healing. Briefly, he wondered what Ichimaru had been thinking back then. Surely he would have sensed Matsumoto's reitsu fading. Had he cared? Or did Rangiku's survival come second to his own. Hisagi shook his head, what did it matter now. It didn't. Who cares what Ichimaru was thinking back then.

"Hisagi-san," called Kira softly.

"Kira, what's up?" wondered Hisagi.

"I... I have a request."

"Request?"

Kira nodded, "Would you mind taking me to see Tosen Kaname?"

* * *

**Author's notes:** The whole Aizen giving Gin mechanical puzzles as birthday present is from my fic September. Thanks for all the reviews guys! And of course thanks for reading.


	6. Chapter 6

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_50 years after the execution_

She liked to listen to him play his guitar. He liked to play for her. He even gave her lessons sometimes and sometimes, they talked about her mother, "I heard she was very pretty and had really big boodies," said little Rangiku, as he walked her and Gin the fox back to Seireitei from the mountains of Rukongai where he still practiced his guitar.

"Who told you that?" wonder Hisagi.

"Ikkaku."

"Figures," muttered Hisagi, "Yes she was very beautiful."

"I hope I am as beautiful as her when I grow-up!" she said.

"You already are," Hisagi assured her.

She grinned, "La, when I grow-up and become as beautiful and sexy as mommy, will you marry me?" she wondered, giving him an earnest look.

Hisagi smiled, "If you still want me, when you grow-up to be the heart-breaker your mother was then I would love to marry you."

She laughed and reached up to clasp his hand, "I'll always want you."

"We'll just have to wait and see, won't we."

* * *

_11 months before the execution_

The obvious question when Kira asked Hisagi to take him to Tosen Kaname was, "Why?"

"I want to ask him some questions," replied Kira, "I don't know if he will answer me. But if I don't try, I will regret it."

"Alright, we can go now."

"You look tired Hisagi-san, I don't want you to push yourself."

"This is not the kind to tired that will be cured after a good nights sleep Kira," whispered Hisagi, his eyes drifting back towards the direction of Sougou Kyuugo Tsumesho. There was nothing more to say after that.

* * *

"You are back, Hisagi," said Tosen, as Hisagi and Kira entered his cell, "Back to try again. What a waste of time. I was not wrong. The path I followed was the path of least bloodshed, it was the path of justice."

"Perhaps, you simply did not _see_ the blood," offered Hisagi, "After all, you are _blind_." There was simply too much malice, too many double meaning in that sentence. It was simply not something Hisagi Shuhei would say under normal circumstances.

"What has happened?" wondered Tosen, "You seem distressed."

"I doubt you would care," replied Hisagi dismissively, "I came tonight because Kira wanted to ask you about something."

"That is strange, Vice-captain Kira Izuru, I cannot think of anything that I maybe able to help you with," commented Tosen.

"I wanted to ask you about Cap...," he caught himself, "Ichimaru, Ichimaru Gin. How did he became part of your conspiracy? Why do you think he became part of your conspiracy? What did you think of him?"

Hisagi shot him a look of disbelief, this was why Kira wanted to talk to Tosen! Why? Tosen spared Hisagi the need voice the question by asking himself, "Why are you asking me? Most of those questions would be better addressed by Ichimaru himself."

"He is not talking," explained Kira, "And I need to know. For my own peace of mind I need to know. In your own way you are an honest man, I know I can trust what you say."

For a moment it looked as if Tosen wasn't going to answer, but then, "They understood each other..."

* * *

They understood each other, Aizen-sama and Gin. They understood each other in a way no one else could understand them. I think Aizen-sama recognized that from the start. Gin was always powerful. I was told that Aizen-sama took an interest in boy genius when Gin murdered the third Seat of the Fifth squad the very night of Gin's joining the Gotei 13 and squad five. Aizen-sama used his zanpakuto's ability to cover-up the death and proceeded to give Gin the newly vacated seat. I do not know exactly how Gin came to kill the former third seat. Gin was offered a seated position as soon as he joined, a seated position below third. If Gin thought that the third seat didn't deserve his position, Gin wouldn't hesitate to take it by force. In that regards Gin isn't all that different from Zaraki Kenpachi. Only difference is that there was an 'official' way for Zaraki to kill the old captain of the eleventh squad and take his position, but Gin's deed was done in the cover of night and was strictly 'unofficial'. It's inconsistencies like these that never made sense to me, that made me want to change the world.

However, I doubt Gin had any such high ambitions. I doubted he ever believed in the cause. Killing without purpose is only murder. On the other hand killing with purpose is justice. Gin didn't need a purpose to shed blood. He was and is a monster. Even when he was a child I thought of him as the grinning demon. He would smile and smile and smile and drive Shinsou through peoples hearts and not even flinch. His actions were not in the cause of justice. He simply loved the carnage. He simply loved the blood. He didn't care about anything or anybody, but he followed Aizen-sama orders. He was a good subordinate, a good lieutenant. Aizen-sama would never think of anyone else as his right hand man and that is the only reason I never killed him. To be honest, I was always wary of him, I never liked him. I doubt there is anyone who could genuinely claim to like Ichimaru. Well except for that girl, but she hardly counts. She grew-up dependent on Ichimaru and I got the distinct impression she never over-came her dependency. I was surprised when I heard that she had blocked his blade when Ichimaru fought Hitsugaya. I was even more surprised when she held a blade to his neck on the Sokyoku Hill. I really didn't think she had it in her. Then again she is a good, obedient Vice-captain. I guess during those times the obedience to the Gotei 13 that has been beaten into her very souls over came her dependency on Ichimaru Gin.

* * *

"And that is all I have to say about Ichimaru Gin," said Tosen, "Did it help, Kira Izuru?"

"I don't know yet," said Kira, "But thank you."

Hisagi opened the door and Kira turned to leave, but then, "You are wrong, Tosen-san."

"About?" wondered Tosen.

"About Captain Ichimaru and Matsumoto-san. Its not just a matter of Matsumoto-san growing-up needing him. Captain wouldn't have stayed with her if thats all there was to it," said Kira, "And you are also wrong about the path of justice, Tosen-san. Just because you swing your blade down for a cause doesn't mean you swing your blade down for justice. Just because the path you walk is the path of least bloodshed doesn't mean justice walks with you. Sometimes you need to shed copious amounts of blood to protect that which is just and the most just thing in the world I can think of free will. We all have it and we should all have it but chaos is often the result of it. That does not mean, however, we should all be slaves to the will of one man," with that he left the room. Not particularly interested in whatever else Tosen had to say on the matter. After all, Tosen Kaname was a man whose words did not often add up to his deeds.

* * *

Hisagi closed the door behind them and turned to Kira, a look of grave concern etched on his face, "Be careful, Kira."

"Wha... what do you mean, Hisagi-san?"

"You have started calling him Captain again."

* * *

**Author's note: **Argh! That was struggle to write. Sorry for the sub-par chapter, I don't know what I was thinking trying to tackle Tosen Kaname. He's like my least favorite character. I like to refer to him as Tosen I-can-only-win-through-backstabbing-in-the-dark Kaname. I hope he and Kensei goes at it in the manga. Wouldn't that be fitting.


	7. Chapter 7

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_10 months before the execution_

His hands were busy with one of the puzzles Aizen had given him what now felt like a lifetime ago, but his mind was filled with thoughts of her. He wanted to see her, but could only do so if she got worse. Yet he wanted her to get better, but if she did he wouldn't get to see her; indeed as things stood he doubted Rangiku would be allowed to attend his execution. Thus he found himself in a dilemma, should he hope she makes a recovery without him or should he hope that she get's worse to the point that Captain Unohana's hand is forced and she is brought to see him. He really wanted to see her, to hold her again. To lie in the warm comfort of her arms and pretend that this was all a bad dream and his date of execution was not drawing ever closer. He had always had a pathological fear of death to the point that he would do just about anything to escape its grasp. Now that he could no longer avoid death, however, he wanted to go to the grave without worry and he was worried. He was worried that she would be miserable, that she would never again regain her will to live and thus follow him into death's cold embrace. He didn't want that. He wanted her to live. He wanted her to endure and because he was still a very selfish man, he wanted her to love him forever. The latter was all but guaranteed. He couldn't imagine Rangiku not missing him or ceasing to love him as ardently as she did now. A part of him told him he was being irrational and fanciful. Time tempered even the most ardent feelings and if Rangiku lived, she would eventually find her feelings for him lessened appropriately. In time, she would move on. She may well learn to love another. Though he would probably go on holding a place in her heart. Thus he found himself in another dilemma, he didn't want her to be miserable but he didn't want to relinquish the hold on her heart. He wanted her to be his forevermore. It was an untenable position.

"Damn it, Rangiku," he whispered in the empty air of his cell, "Yer all I have and sometimes I wish I didn't have ya. If I didn't have ya, I wouldn't have nothing ta look forward ta. My hope would da died. But now, all I can do is hope. Hope I get ta see ya again. Even if it's jus' one las' time"

* * *

It's wasn't that she wanted to stop eating, it more than she could no longer keep food down. Even her beloved dried persimmon tasted like ash in her mouth and even if she fought past the taste to sallow, her body simply rejected it and she ended vomiting back up what little she had managed to get down. They had resorted to feeding her through an IV drip but she wasn't improving. She was simply wasting away before their eyes.

"Isn't there something you can do?" demanded Hitsugaya, "There has to be something you can do!"

Captain Unohana shook her head sadly, "We started treating her with mood elevators but they all led to adverse reactions. This new symptom is a physiological manifestation of her psychological state. She does not want to live, so her body is slowly shutting down. There is nothing I can do at this point."

"There must be something, someone can do!" stated Hitsugaya, "Please! I don't want her to die! If it hadn't been for Matsumoto I would never have become a shinigami. If it hadn't been for her I would have killed my granny with my own powers without realizing it. She never said I am like ice, just like granny, she never said it. You can't let her die."

Captain Unohana closed her eyes for a moment, when she opened it, it was full of resolve, "Then there is only one path open to us. You must help me convince Captain commander to let us bring Ichimaru Gin to her."

* * *

"No," said Captain Commander Yamamoto, "Ichimaru Gin is too dangerous to be let out of his cell. The only time he will leave his cell is when he is lead to the Shrine of Penitence and he will leave the Shrine of Penitence when it is time for him to go to the Sokyoku Hill."

"But Captain Commander, he is the only one who has any possibility of getting through to Vice-captain Matsumoto," insisted Captain Unohana, "I do not suggest this lightly. I have waited more then a month trying everything that I could think of. This is the last resort."

"Please Captain Commander," begged Hitsugaya, "Please! Vice-captain Matsumoto has been a loyal and valuable member of the Gotei 13. Please don't let her die like this."

"My answer remains no. I will not permit the removal of Ichimaru Gin from his cell," he held up a hand to silence the protests that were just forming on the lips of the two captains, "However, I will allow you to temporarily move Matsumoto Rangiku into his cell. If she improves, let us hope she improves to the point of being able to live-on without him and if she does not improve then she would get to spend what time remains to her with the man she clearly loves deeply. Little though he deserves it."

"Thank you Captain Commander," said Captain Unohana with a bow, in which Hitsugaya joined her, "I will make the arrangements for her transfer immediately."

* * *

Her reitsu seemed to be moving towards him and Kira was with her. He wondered if his lieutenant was bring her to him. Her reitsu had been getting weaker, she probably wouldn't be allowed to move around on her own. Not that he cared about the details, all he cared about was that she was coming. All he cared about was that he was going to get to see her. When the door was opened by Vice-captain Kotetsu Isane, two squad four shinigamis walked in caring a bed, slightly larger and many times more comfortable then the one with which he had been provided. They swiftly and expertly made up the bed with soft sheets and thick quilts, before leaving.

Ichimaru smiled from ear to ear, "I'm get'n a new bed! When did the Captain commander take a liken ta me?" he wondered.

"The bed is for Vice-captain Matsumoto Rangiku," Isane informed him, much to Ichimaru's surprise, "Due to her failing health the Captain commander has allowed her to be place in here to spend what time remains to her with you."

"What ya mean, what time remains to her!" demanded Ichimaru, his smile vanishing, "Rangiku ain't gonna die."

"Her body refuses to keep sustenance down and is generally slowly shutting down. She has lost the will to live," Isane informed him.

"Oh," he started smiling again, "Is that all."

"What do you mean, is that all!" demanded Isane, losing her cool.

"Back before we joined the Gotei 13, I used ta be able ta get 'er ta eat cockroaches when things got tough and that's all we had ta eat. She didn't want ta, left alone she would have just curled up in a corner and waited ta die. Rangiku never had much of the will ta live fer the sake a living. She needs a reason ta live. Used ta be, I was 'er only reason ta live. But since we became Shinigami she had the Gotei 13 ta live fer. Guess she thinks the Gotei 13 no longer needs 'er and well..." his grin widened, "I ain't gonna be around fer much longer am I."

Isane didn't know how to answer, so she busied herself unpacking some of Rangiku's stuff that she had brought. She was soon joined by Captain Unohana who was followed by Kira and the third seat of the fourth squad Iemura Yasochika, they were carrying Rangiku' on a stretcher. At the sight of her thin pale form, Gin's smile faltered. He was on his feet and in quick long strides he was by her side. Before Kira and Iemura could put her stretcher down, Gin had her in his arms and was carrying her back to his bed. She was barely conscious, either they gave her something or she was just too weak to stay conscious. He didn't know, but it frightened him and all he could think of was to keep her conscious, to keep her awake.

"Ain't a handful Rangiku," he chided her, "I leave ya alone fer a little while and look what ya do ta yerself! Why ain't ya eat'n, did they put bamboo shoots in everyth'n or someth'n."

"No," she said in a barely audible whisper, "But everything tastes like bamboo shoots or worse."

"Wha'? It tastes like dried taro?" he wondered, smiling once again.

"You are the one who doesn't like dried taro. I never had a problem with it," she said, managing a faint smile.

Gin pouted, "That ain't fair Rangiku, ya can't like something I don't like. How am I gonna steal food from yer plate if I have ta be afraid of accidentally eat'n dried taro think'n it was dried persimmon," which was what had happened when he had discovered the food he hated.

He had expected her to keep smiling but instead his words brought tears to her eyes as it occurred to her that the days of having Gin steal food off her plate were swiftly coming to an end, "Why, Gin?" she wondered all of a sudden, "Why did you join him? Why did you leave me?" she wondered.

He knew more then one pair of ears was waiting for his answer but his answer was only meant for one pair of ears, "Ya know me, Rangiku," he whispered, "I ain't very good at being content and happy but I am very good with the deadly sins."

She closed her eyes and let the tears flow free. Of course she knew. Of course she understood, even if no one else in the room did. Gin would never be content and happy and he would always lust after, envy those with, be a glutton for, have pride in his own and be greedy for power.

"You are missing wrath and sloth," she whispered through her tears, "They don't really fit."

He smiled a true smile and gently kissed her on the forehead, "Probably why I gotta have ya. If I was seven fer seven... I probably wouldn't have noth'n good. Karma be'n a bitch an' all."

* * *

**Author's note: **Umm... yes... I hope everybody likes this chapter. Took me a long time to get started. The opening was giving a lot of trouble. Still not sure about it. Thank you to all who are still reading! Thanks also for all the reviews, they are great motivators.


	8. Chapter 8

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_50 years after the execution_

"Ukitake-san!" called Rangiku as waved a obsenely large ball of candy floss, "Come quickly! The fireworks are going to start."

Ukitake smiled at her and made his way to her, little Shunsui, Kyoraku and Nanao, "That's a lot of candy floss," he commented, taking in Rangiku's pink candy floss ball and Shunsui's blue candy floss ball.

Shunsui usual grin got unbelievably large, taking him into the realm of cute usually managed by small furry mammals, "This is my third one!" he declared.

"That's nothing to be proud of!" scolded Nanao.

"Come now Nanao-chan," said Kyoraku with a laugh, "Let the boy enjoy himself. The festivals come around only a few times year!"

Shunsui grinned up at his father and gently squeezed his hand in thanks. Kyoraku was not a strict father by any standards but he did insist that his two children have a firm grasp on each of his hands or those of Nanao when they were in large crowds. "I love festivals!" he declared, "I get to have candy floss, I get new toys and I get to watch fireworks!"

"If only you got candy floss and new toys only during festivals," said Nanao in a long suffering voice, "You two are the most spoiled kids in all of Seireitei. How you have not become rotten is beyond me," she declared.

Little Shunsui beamed up at her, "It's all because of you, Nanao-san. With a great role model like you, how can we possible get spoilt rotten!"

Nanao couldn't help but smile, "You little charmer."

Kyoraku laughed, "That's my boy," letting go his hand briefly to ruffle his silver, silver hair, "Takes after his old man doesn't he Ukitake?"

Ukitake nodded, "If you are not careful, Shunsui, you are going to get as bad a reputation as Kyoraku here and not to mention the constant scolding from Yama-jii."

"Yama-jii never scolds me," declared Shunsui, "He says I am the best student he ever had and he's always giving me sweets!"

"Clearly Yama-jii has gone soft since he retired," commented Nanao.

"No he hasn't!" protested Rangiku, "He's as tough as ever! He just has more time to buy sweets now! That's all!"

Kyoraku laughed, "Well I am glad, it's much more fun to get sweets from Yama-jii then scolding," he assured them. _And I am also glad_, Kyoraku thought to himself, _that Yama-jii was kind enough to let Rangiku stay with Ichimaru all those years ago. Her death wasn't something I wanted but I cannot but be grateful for the two of you._

* * *

_10 months before the execution_

"So they moved her into his cell, Ichimaru must be happy," commented Ukitake.

"From the sounds of it, he's ecstatic," agreed Kyoraku, "Yama-jii granted Nanao-chan access to the cell so she could visit Rangiku. She says that Ichimaru so happy that she feel like stabbing him. Although given how he always smiles, I am not sure how she can tell he's happy and not just being... well him. On the upside Rangiku is improving daily. She is eating again and regaining her strength. Nanao says that she looks happy, almost as happy as she was before Aizen's betrayal was discovered."

"I guess that's good, but this does seem to be a house built on shifting sand," Ukitake pointed out, "What is going to happen after Ichimaru is executed?" wondered Ukitake.

"I try not to think about it," said Kyoraku a little sadly, "I just hope that Ichimaru cares about her enough to help her accept the inevitable."

"There is also the matter of if he can do anything to help her accept the inevitable," said Ukitake, "I cannot begin to imagine what a person could do to help someone do that."

"There is that," agreed Kyoraku, "Especially when that someone is as afraid of death as Ichimaru."

* * *

At the beginning all he did was hold her, try to coax her into eating and try to talk about light frivolous topics packed with as much humor as he could manage just so she wouldn't start crying. He succeeded, she would obediently eat anything he fed her. She smiled and laughed appropriately. She let him hold her tight. In all that he needed to do, he was not only helped by the fact that Rangiku did not like to upset him but also because she soon realized he desperately needed her. He needed her to be strong so he could lean on her and pour into her bosoms all the fears of his heart. Literally.

"I jus' see darkness," he whispered as he gently nuzzled her soft breasts, "I keep try'n ta move my mind ta after death ya know and I jus' see darkness."

"We are shinigami Gin, we precide over death," Rangiku pointed out as she slowly stroked his hair, "We know what comes after. When you die you get reborn into the living world."

"That's if ya die normally. They are gonna kill me with the Sokyoku. It burns away the soul. I ain't gonna get reborn. It'll jus' be over fer me. I mean, ain't that why we destroyed the Quincy? Cause they were really destroy'n hollows so that the soul the hollow was and the souls that the hollow consumed were jus' gone. Jus' taken out of the circle of life and death," whispered Gin, Rangiku could feel a faint tremor run through his body as he clutched her closer to him

"I don't believe that," said Rangiku, "They wouldn't be so cruel. As shinigami we are suppose to keep the balance. Destroying souls, really destroying souls isn't keeping the balance."

"What's the difference in destroying one rotten soul, that's what I would be think'n," said Gin, "And it ain't like we never destroy hollows with kido. We try not ta do it but we don't exactly lose sleep over it. Nay Rangiku, I am finished and even if I get reborn, that ain't any better. I got lucky this lifetime and got ta be a shinigami. If there is a next lifetime fer me... who knows what I am gonna be. I might end up a hollow or be'n eaten by one. I doubt I can become a shinigami twice in a row."

"You could just be a normal soul. Would that be so bad?"

"The idea of be'n trash ain't very comforting, Rangiku."

Rangiku sighed but Gin's comment brought to mind a question she had always wanted to ask him but never did, "Would you have saved me if I didn't have spiritual power?"

"If ya didn't have spiritual power, ya wouldn't have collapsed and I wouldn't have ta save ya," Gin pointed out.

Rangiku smiled, "It's that simple for you isn't it."

"It is that simple," replied Gin, "I don' no why ya try'n ta complicate thing."

"Do you ever wonder where we would be now if you hadn't met Aizen?" wondered Rangiku.

"I ain't very good with what ifs, Rangiku," said Gin, "Maybe we would be married with li'l ones or maybe I would've ended up in a cell sooner. Hard ta tell really. I mean, Cap'n Aizen didn't turn me in ta what I am. It's because of what I am that Cap'n Aizen let me in on his plans. It ain't the other way around."

Rangiku closed her eyes and forcing herself not to cry. It was true of course. Ichimaru Gin had always been a sadist whose loyalty never extended beyond himself. Then again if the Gotei 13 could tolerate Kurotsuchi Mayuri, surely it would never have turned against Ichimaru Gin had Ichimaru Gin not turned against it. After all, Captain-commander Yamamoto was an extremely tolerant and embracing man. As long as his Captains served the interests of the Gotei 13 he didn't care if they were a humanoid fox, a mad scientist or Zaraki Kenpachi. Room 46 on the other-hand was a different story but they're chief goal was to keep peace and order. If Gin's peculiarities did not interfere with the peace and order, they wouldn't have cared either or at least that's what she believed. What ifs were hard and who knows how things would have worked out in reality.

"I would have liked little ones," she said finally, "I always wanted a family. Even before I met you I would dream of having children of my own. Of course back then I wanted a family so I wouldn't be alone. After I met you I wanted a family with you because I wanted something that was half you and half me. I just... I just love you so much..." she couldn't stop the tears from flowing this time, "So much that... that I could never have enough of you to love. I just..." choked by her tears she couldn't go on.

Gin raised his head and slowly started to kiss away her tears, "Ya know Rangiku, it ain't too late fer li'l ones. Yer here, I'm here and we have a nice comfy bed. Last I checked that's all we needed ta try and make babies. What say ya? Even if we don' succeed, we'll have a lot of fun jus' try'n."

Rangiku laughed through her tears and pulled him up for a kiss, "Yes," she whispered, "Let's try," after that there was nothing left to say but plenty to do.

* * *

**Author's notes:** Hmm... I seem to have lost the ability to judge how this story is going. I can't tell if it's still good and interesting or if it's dragging and I should hurry up and get to the point. I kind of seem to have a lot more story to tell then when I first started. A well, nothing to do but keep going and hope all you wonderful people keep reading and reviewing.


	9. Chapter 9

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_50 years after the execution_

"O no!" cried Rangiku as she ran through Seireitai with Gin the stuffed silver fox, "I am going to be late for my lesson with Yama-jii. I know, I'll cut across the fifth squad training grounds. I am sure they won't mind and that's a short-cut to Yama-jii's house."

Rangiku didn't come to the fifth squad grounds all that often. She had no friends in the division, her father was not particularly close to Captain Abarai and she got the distinct feeling some of the shinigami didn't really like her. Although she couldn't imagine why. Maybe they were just weird. Pre-occupied her thoughts she didn't notice the two shinigami were were lounging casually around the training grounds. "Well look there, if it isn't that traitor's spawn," said one of them to the other.

Rangiku, however, did not become aware of them until she found one of them blocking her path while the other snatched her doll from her arms, "Hey! What's the meaning of this! Give me Gin back!"

"Gin!" exclaimed the shinigami holding the doll, "She isn't even ashamed of it. She actually named her doll after him," he said, mostly addressing his companion.

Rangiku was a little confused but then it dawned on her that the shinigami were probably referring to her mother's friendship with Ichimaru Gin, "I'll have you know, there is nothing wrong with my mom naming her dolls after her friend or for me keeping that name. Now give Gin back or else!"

"Or else what?" demanded the other shinigami, "You are going to run to your 'daddy', are you. You little shit!"

Rangiku narrowed her eyes, "I don't need to bother daddy about dealing with trash like you two," pointing two fingers at the shinigami holding Gin she said, "Bakudō no. 1 Sail," Gin dropped from his hands as they shot behind him locked together. Before Gin hit the ground Rangiku caught him.

"Why you little..." the other shinigami moved towards her.

Calmly Rangiku turned towards him and said, "Bakudō no. 9 Geki," immediate a flash of red light engulfed the shinigami and he was completely paralyzed, "Who the hell do you take me for!" demanded Rangiku, "I am Kyoraku Rangiku, don't mess with me."

The paralyzed Shinigami couldn't speak but his friends started laughing and said, "O I know who you are. I know who you are clearly better then you do. Your the spawn of that..." suddenly he found his head in the hook of Wabisuke.

"Are you sure you want to finish that sentence?" asked Kira calmly.

"Ca..captain Kira..." whispered the Shinigami.

"What was he about to say?" demanded Rangiku.

"Nothing of any importance," Kira assured her, "Now what are you doing here?" he wondered.

"Oh! I was running late for my kendo lesson with Yama-jii. I have to go, see you later Captain Kira!" she called as she dashed off. Having not yet mastered Shunpo, she was forced to run the conventional way. As she ran, she wonder briefly what the shinigami was about to say but then decided that he was probably going to make some comment about her mother in regards to Ichimaru Gin. Given how the two shinigamis had reacted upon hearing the name of her doll, it was the most logical conclusion. She supposed that after the three traitors had been found out, most of their old friends probably disowned them. Maybe her mother didn't and some shinigami, specially those of the squads three, five and nine would still resent those who stood by the traitors.

"Yes, your mother never gave up on Ichimaru," Yama-jii told her when she reached his house to find him and her brother had already started the lesson, "While she always put the Gotei 13 first, she never disowned him. But it is nothing to be resentful about and certainly nothing anyone should be bringing up with you. I shall be discussing this incident with Captain Abarai," he assured her.

"I wouldn't worry about that," she said cheerfully, "I am sure Captain Kira marched those men right into Captain Abarai's office and had them sorted out."

"Yes, Yama-jii," Shunsui agreed, "Captain Kira isn't the type to let things like this slide. Neither is Captain Abarai. Those men will regret ever bothering Rangiku before this day is out."

"Hmm... I am certain you are right," agreed Yama-jii, "But I will still be making sure the appropriate punishment has been doled out. But enough of this, come children, it is time we continued the lesson."

* * *

"It's Hinamori, they would never have dared do something like this if they didn't think she would throw her support behind them," said Renji to Kira after he had finished dealing with the two shinigami, "Time is making her remember 'Captain Aizen' more fondly. She definitely has issues with me being her captain. I think she resents the fact that out of the three of us, four if you count Hisagi-san, she was the only one who hasn't achieved bankai. I think she resents having to become the subordinate of a classmate. I mean, first she had to watch Hitsugaya become Captain despite joining the ranks of the Shinigami after her and then me, you, Hisagi-san all achieved bankai and became captains and she... well she's been left behind."

"I don't see how any of this has anything to do with Aizen or Rangiku-chan for that matter," said Kira.

"Well, she was happy while Aizen was her captain. He made her feel as if she could achieve anything. Plus I don't think she ever fully accepted that Aizen was the master mind and not Ichimaru Gin," explained Renji, "She certainly hates those kids and isn't shy about saying so either."

"What!" cried Kira, "I have never heard her say anything."

"She's not stupid and she doesn't go saying it in front of everybody," said Renji, "But there is a small group of shinigami, about five or six of them, to whom those two definitely belong. Most of them joined the squad with Aizen and still don't believe he was what he was. Hinamori has fallen in with them and even though she was there, even though she fought in the winter war, she isn't averse to sitting with them and fondly reminiscing about Aizen. It would be totally harmless if it wasn't making her forget the _real_ Aizen."

* * *

He found her in her office, dutifully completing the mountain of paperwork associated with running a messenger squad, "Kira-kun!" she cried as he entered the office, but then catching her mistake, "I mean Captain Kira."

"Have I ever stopped you from calling me Kira-kun, Hinamori-kun?" wondered Kira.

"O no, but it's not right that I call you Kira-kun anymore," she said, looking a bit sad, "What brings you here?"

"I had to talk to Abarai-kun about two of your squad members who I caught assaulting Rangiku-chan," he explained.

"Assaulting Rangiku-chan!" exclaimed Hinamori, "Is she ok?"

"She's fine. Even at such a young age she is much stronger then they are."

"Another child genius, how nice!" she said, although she clearly hadn't intended it the bitterness was evident in her tone.

Kira regarded her for awhile before saying, "So it is true."

"What's true?" wondered Hinamori, feeling as if he was sprinting ahead in a word game that she did not know the rules to.

"You don't like those children, but why? What have they done to you?"

At first it looked as if she wouldn't answer but then, "They exist."

"What does that suppose to mean?"

"Exactly what I said," yelled Hinamori, unable to keep her temper in check, "They killed my captain in the field of battle. He didn't get a year to make peace with everyone. He didn't get a year to leave behind a piece of him. Even his zanpakuto was destroyed. I have nothing! Nothing left of him."

"You have the scare he gave you," Kira pointed out.

For a moment Hinamori looked like she was about to attack Kira but she brought her emotion under control, "What do you want from me, Captain Kira?"

"I would like to know why you of all people are still pining for Aizen Souske," stated Kira.

"Me! What about you! You are still pining for that traitorous snake!" screamed Hinamori, "You can still love and miss your captain but I am not allowed to love and miss mine! How is that fair?"

"I don't miss an illusion," said Kira frankly, "You don't love or miss the real Aizen. You loved and you now miss the Aizen that was an illusion. The kind captain, the caring man who always had a word praise for everyone. The real Aizen was neither kind nor caring. He was manipulative, a megalomaniac and a sociopath."

"That makes him different from Ichimaru how?" demanded Hinamori.

"I never said he was different from Captain Ichimaru, but Captain Ichimaru never pretended that he was not a manipulative sadist," said Kira, "I still miss my captain despite his flaws. Not because I am compulsively over looking them. You... you have managed transfer all that was wrong with yours on to mine and let your heart grow fond again for a man that never existed, except as an illusion that was as cunningly crafted as anything his zanpakuto could have conjured."

"And what of it!" she demanded, "You have all left me, you have all forgotten me. You all have your own lives and I am..." tears welled up in her eyes, "Hitsugaya-kun was never the same after Rangiku-san's death. Especially when it was followed so soon by Granny's death. Even now there is a distance between us that I can't bridge. You... you found time to hang out with Abarai-kun, with Hisagi-san but not with me. After awhile Abarai-kun got busy and then one day, after I ran this squad for ten years without a captain, Abarai-kun just walks in as Captain Abarai! I know he has bankai but I have been a vice-captain longer then him! I had been acting captain of this squad for ten years! But suddenly none of that mattered. All that mattered was that the chances of me achieving bankai was next to nil."

"Abarai-kun earned his captaincy," replied Kira quietly, "You are not incapable of achieving bankai. You just didn't want to because deep down inside you didn't want anyone to take Aizen's place, least of all you and now that Abarai-kun is the captain of this squad, you no longer have a reason to achieve bankai. This all goes back to your delusions concerning Aizen."

Hinamori closed her eyes and let her tears flow freely, "I know I am deluding myself. All I have to do is look in the mirror while getting dressed and I know what the real Captain Aizen was. But..." she covered her face with her hands and kept crying, "When everybody has moved on and I find myself stuck exactly where I was fifty years ago... I can't help but thinking what would life have been like if Captain Aizen was still around. But he's not around but _he_ is," there was so much venom in her voice that it shocked Kira, "I won't lie to you. I can't stand that boy. I look at him and all I see is Captain Ichimaru. I hated him, even before he was revealed as a traitor I hated him and couldn't understand how you could be so devoted to him. I couldn't understand why Captain Aizen still sometimes accidentally said 'Gin' when issuing orders," she admitted.

"It's not fair," whispered Hinamori, "it's not fair that, that snake got to spawn and that no one seems to care that those to kids are his spawn. They all love them. Every single one of them. Rangiku-chan I can understand. She looks just like Rangiku-san so it's only natural Hitsugaya-kun and Hisagi-san would like her so much. But what about that boy! He looks exactly like Ichimaru but no one seems to care! Yamamoto-sama can't stop praising him and treats him as if he really is Captain Kyoraku's son and..."

"He is Captain Kyoraku's son," Kira said firmly, "No one is pretending on that score. Being a father is lot more then just about blood," a hard edged slipped into Kira's voice as he continued, "I came here tonight hoping that Abarai-kun was wrong about you. But I see now that he wasn't. So I'll tell you this Vice-captain Hinamori, control your friends and yourself. I do not care if you and them spend your days idolizing Aizen but if your venoms ever touch those children again, you will lose your heads to Wabisuke."

"Kira-kun! Why?"

"You were right about me avoiding you. At least, I was actively avoiding you straight after the execution because out of everybody you were the only person who was happy about Captain Ichimaru's execution. This included Soi Fon and Yamamoto-san, by the end even they were sorry that Captain had to die. If only because by killing him they would be adding two orphans to the world. But you... I couldn't do it, Hinamori-kun. I couldn't be around someone who couldn't, who wouldn't forgive my captain. Especially when I had let go of all my bitterness and resentment towards Aizen. And after tonight," Kira looked sad, "I don't think I know you any more, Vice-captain Hinamori. Because the Hinamori Momo that I thought I knew would never say such bitter words about a child, any child, let alone the children of the woman who used to call her friend."

Hinamori looked away, "You are right. I am no longer the Hinamori Momo that I once was. I don't know when I changed but I did. I can't say that I like the person that I am now, but I think it might be too late to change back."

Kira opened his mouth to say something, anything but no words came out. There seemed to be such an huge gulf between them. After standing and staring at her for a little while longer, Kira turned and left. As he walked back to the third squad barracks he remembered the time he drew a blade against Hinamori in the defense of his captain. He realized that he was willing to do it again if he needed to, but this time his blade would be drawn in defense of his captains children. Both of whom he loved as deeply and as devotedly as he had his captain.

* * *

**Author's note:** Well this chapter ended up being longer then I thought it would be, which is why I left of the "before execution" bit I was planning on adding. Thanks for continuing to read and thanks for all the reviews. I know this chapter is... let's go with different. But I hope no one bitterly dislikes it and just takes it as an interesting change of pace. We'll be back to Gin and Rangiku in the next chapter. 


	10. Chapter 10

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_9 months before the execution_

"Kira Izuru, how nice to see you again!" said Onabara Gengoro, "It is always a delight when my former students come to visit me. I hope you are doing well?"

Kira bowed, "As well as can be expected sensei."

Onabara nodded looking solemn, "You are of course referring to the impending executions. A sad matter, a truly sad matter. I taught both Tosen and Ichimaru of course." said Onabara, "Indeed Ichimaru was in the very first special advanced class that I undertook as head teacher. Ichimaru was something: so young, so talented, so focused on his studies. He had an almost insatiable thirst for knowledge and the power that went with it. Only thing that could distract him from his almost terrifying pursuit of knowledge was Matsumoto Rangiku. I don't know if I would call it love, mostly because there was something about Ichimaru that made me think he wasn't capable of that emotion, but he certainly liked being with her. He was so very possessive of her. When they were together, he would always hold her hand. He had an intimadating smile for anyone who dared approach her while she was with him. He also sneaked into the girls' dorm every night to be with her. Of course the other girls complained. Not that he did anything but they found his very presence creepy. It got to the point that I had to have a talk with him. The single most frightening experience of my life. He didn't say or do anything. Just sat there listening and grinning. I never would have believed how effective grinning could be as an act of intimidation till I met Ichimaru Gin," Onabara shivered slightly at the very memory of it, "Truth be told Kira, I am not surprised Ichimaru is heading to the gaols. Not the least bit surprised."

"Most people aren't," agreed Kira, "I don't think anyone really trusted him. Even Matsumoto-san didn't have any difficulty believing he was a traitor, though she was surprised by it. Aizen and Tosen came more as a shock."

"I am not surprised. I didn't have Aizen as a student but I did ran into him from time to time when he came to teach his calligraphy course or just to inspect the students. Always found him a polite pleasant man. I never understood how a man like that could tolerate Ichimaru as a vice-captain. Couldn't imagine too people more different from each other. But I guess the truth of the matter was that they were both the same. Ichimaru just never bother hiding his true face or rather, the mask he wore was more overt. Because who really knows what's going on underneath that grin save Gin himself."

Kira nodded, "Sensei, what happened after you had your talk? Did he stop visiting Matsumoto-san?" he wondered.

"He stopped going to the girls' dorm yes. She sneaked into the boys' dorm once or twice. The boys didn't mind, Ichimaru did. They started sleeping out in the grounds. If the weather was unfavorable they would spend the night in the library or in one of the classrooms. In the end, I gave in and had Matsumoto moved to a room by herself and Ichimaru pretty much moved in with her. Though his presence in the room wasn't official due to the fact that the room was in the girls' dorm." he explained, "That was the arrangement for the last six months of the only year he spent in the academy," explained Onabara, "I think you know what happened after. He graduated top of everything. Got offers from almost every squad in the Gotei 13 and the Onmitsukidō. He chose squad five, I guess it was because they offered him a seated position. Not the third seat of course, but something fairly high. He got the third seat when the then third seat died during a routine patrol shortly after he joined the squad."

Kira felt no need to inform Onabara that the former third seat of the fifth squad had not died during a routine patrol but had actually been killed by Ichimaru. "Was squad five the only squad to offer him the seated position?" wondered Kira.

"Hmm... come to think of it now, I believe squad three and seven did as well. But I am not certain what seats they were," replied Onabara.

Kira nodded, "Sensei, if it is not too much trouble, may I ask if he continued his visits to Matsumoto-san after he graduated."

Onabara thought for awhile, "I don't think he did. Well not at first. Certainly, I remember this short period of time when Matsumoto missed a lot of classes. Her grades dropped and she came close to failing several of her subjects. Every time I saw her she had this lost expression on her face. She gave up her single room, saying she didn't need it any more. After awhile, things improved with her. She became cheerful again, her grades improved but she wasn't quite what she used to be. But then, all of a sudden she was completely back to her old self and more! Soon after that the girls started complaining about Ichimaru sneaking into the girls' dorm. Certainly he didn't do it every night but he did it frequently enough for me to give Matsumoto her old room back," he shook his head, "I often thought about having a word with Matsumoto in regards to Ichimaru. I mean, she was a child and I knew she didn't have anyone. She certainly had no adult advising her. But I doubt a girl as intelligent as her did not know Ichimaru was not good for her. I think she knew full well, I just don't think she cared."

They sat in silence for awhile before Onabara asked, "How is she taking his impending execution?"

"Not well," answered Kira truthfully, "She tried to kill herself. If it hadn't been for the fortunate presence of Hisagi-san and Captain Komamura, she would be dead by now. After Captain Unohana managed to save her from the poison, she started wasting away. She lost the will to live, was what Captain Unohana said. Captain Unohana had no choice but to move her into his cell. I haven't been back since I helped them move her in, but I hear she is improving. In fact, they say she has improved to the point that Captain-commander Yamamoto is thinking of having her removed back to Sougou Kyuugo Tsumesho."

"I see," said Onabara, still digesting the information, "That is sad but not entirely unexpected. I hope she finds the strength in her to face the world without him. She has it. I am certain she does. I would hate to have to attend her funeral," he signed, "No, no, her funeral should be well after mine. As should yours, Kira Izuru, as should yours. Take care of yourself, won't you."

Kira bowed, "Thank you for your kind words Onabara sensei. Let me return them to you by wishing you a long and happy life. I would hate to have to attend your funeral any time soon, too." Onabara laughed and after few more exchanges of pleasantries Kira left.

_I think I am beginning to know you a little better Captain_, he found himself thinking as he walked back to squad three, _At least I know more of your life. But I feel like I am missing something. Some big piece of the puzzle. Why DID you choose squad five? Was it simply because they offered you a higher seat? You couldn't have know about Aizen Souske before you joined as I doubt Vice-captain Aizen Souske would have been a regular at the academy as Captain Aizen Souske. Was your sole motivation the higher seat? How DID you come to kill the third seat? Did Aizen spur you on? It would have been pretty bold to kill the seat on a whim. Even if you succeeded in hiding the crime, there was no guarantee the seat would go to you. Should I just conclude that after you joined squad five, Aizen saw your potential immediately and suggested to you that if you succeed in killing the third seat, the seat will be yours? Should I just assume you did it all because, as you said to Matsumoto-san, you are good with the deadly sins? Would you, Captain, give me a straight answer to any of these question if I ask them of you? Probably not, which is a pity because I am running out of people to ask. But the last person on my list is Neliel Tu Oderschvank and I am keen to hear the history she would tell of you._

* * *

"Do I have to leave right now?" wondered Rangiku a little sadly, after Isane explained to her that she was now deemed strong enough to be removed back to Sougou Kyuugo Tsumesho.

"No not immediately," replied Isane with a reassuring smile, laying a gentle hand on her shoulder "But soon. Maybe tomorrow or the day after. Let's make it the day after. The Shingami women's association is meeting on that day. We can have a party to celebrate you regaining your health."

"Now that would be nice, won't it Rangiku," Ichimaru joined in, "Ya always loved a party," Rangiku smiled but it didn't reach her eyes, "What ya worried about. I ain't dy'n for another nine months and Captain commander-san hasn't revoked yer permission ta come visit me. Just don' try ta kill yerself again and they'll let ya out. Then ya can come visit me anytime ya want. I mean, it ain't like I am go'n anywhere."

This time Rangiku did managed a smile that reach all the way to her eyes, "I think I'll do just that!" she agreed.

"Matsumoto-san," whispered Isane, it was then that Rangiku noticed that she hadn't removed her hand from her shoulder, "I think you should come with me right now to see Captain Unohana. I mean, you are strong enough to walk right? I don't want you fatiguing yourself."

Rangiku was a little surprised, "What... sure, yes I can walk. But why the change? I thought you said I could leave tomorrow or the day after even."

"Yes, but that was before I knew you were pregnant," Isane told her, "This room messes with my senses but when I laid my hand on you... I can sense it. It's only a few days old but it's there."

Ichimaru's eyes were open, shock shining through them, "Wait! We actually succeeded? We manage ta make a baby?" he demanded.

Rangiku looked equally shocked but then a look of pure happiness spread over her features, "Gin I am going to have a baby!"

"Wait! Wait! You two were trying to have a baby?" asked Isane, looking slightly scandalized.

"Well we didn' exactly do anything we haven' done thousands of times before," said Ichimaru, "Don' usually manage ta make a baby, except for that one time..." he trailed off, certain that Isane remembered that incident having played a small part in that drama.

Alluding to her previous miscarriage, however, had been a bad move. The happiness immediately left her to be replaced with abject terror, "No! Not this time! Isane," she cried clutching her, "I can't lose this baby too. Please, please, please I'll do anything you and Captain Unohana tell me to. But I can't lose this baby."

"Calm down, Matsumoto-san," said Isane, "Right now the best thing you can do for the baby is calm down. Spirit bodies are not like living bodies. The 'will' matters. That's why accidental pregnancies are so rare in Soul Society but not all that uncommon in the living world. If you were actually trying to have a baby, your chances of success would be significantly higher," she explained as Ichimaru left his own bed and came to sit next to Rangiku, pulling her into his arms. An act that seemed to immediately calm her.

Isane started pacing around the room, thinking. "I think," she said after awhile, "I think you should stay here Matsumoto-san till I go get Captain Unohana. The fact that you had a miscarriage in the past had slipped my mind. I'll bring her and she'll know what to do," with that she left.

They sat in silence for a little while. Still getting used to the news. Finally Rangiku looked him full in the face and said, "Gin we are going to have a baby! I am finally getting my family!" Her smile was back and Gin couldn't remember when he had ever seen her this happy.

He smiled a genuine smile and looked at her fully with those stunning blue eyes of his and said, "Yeah ya are and I am glad. Now ya'll finally have all the love I never manage ta give ya."

* * *

**Author's note:** The whole Rangiku having a miscarriage is from my story September. What can I say, I like trying to have some sort of continuity between my fics if possible. Thanks for reading and thank you for all the reviews, I do like reading them.


	11. Chapter 11

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_50 years after the execution_

"Shiro-chan!" called Shunsui as he jumped from behind to latch onto Hitsugaya's shoulders, "Let's go play!"

"You let him called you Shiro-chan?" wondered Hinamori sadly, not to mention a little hurt.

"No!' Hitsugaya said in irritation, "He's just even more stubborn then you are. Stop calling me Shiro-chan," he said to Shunsui, as reached behind him to grab the boy by the yukata and pull him in front, "And I don't have time to play with you."

Shunsui looked up into Hitsugaya's eyes as his own opened fully, he had his mother's eyes and managed to pull off just her look of hurt as he whispered, "But I was so looking forward to it, come play with me! You can do stupid, boring paperwork anytime! Come play with me," he insisted, managing to look entirely too cute, too adorable for anyone to say no to.

"Fine," said Hitsugaya with a very believable look of reluctance, although in truth he wasn't all that reluctant. Hitsugaya Toshiro always had time for his former lieutenants children, "What do you want to play?"

"Shunpo tag!" he declared, touching Hitsugaya on the nose he said, "Tag! Your it!" before disappearing in a burst of Shunpo.

"Why you little..." Hitsugaya too disappeared in a burst of Shunpo, leaving Hinamori alone to feel neglected and burning with resentment and jealousy.

* * *

_9 months before the execution_

"I am pregnant!" declared Matsumoto as soon as Nanao and Hisagi entered her room in the Sougou Kyuugo Tsumesho for a visit.

"What!" they exclaimed in unison, shock being the primary emotion but disgust was not far behind. The thought of _his_ seed growing in her belly was enough to make Hisagi's stomach churn and Nanao was fighting a strong urge to slap her and demand what the hell she was thinking.

Matsumoto, however, was too happy to see the disgust in her friends' eyes, "I hope it's a boy with his hair. I always loved his hair. Then I could call my son Gin after him. I mean, I always thought the name was a bit weird but if he has silver hair it would be perfect wouldn't it?" she wondered, but instead of waiting for an answer she continued, "Although Gin says that he can't imagine me having anything but a girl. I would love a girl too. I could dress her up in cute little yukatas and do her hair up with ribbons. She could be like a little living doll. I never had dolls growing up. Gin had this little dirty vaguely fox shaped thing. He would let me play with it sometimes but it was so fragile I would be too scared to touch it," she explained before finally focusing on them again and smiling with so much happiness that both Nanao and Hisagi found themselves smiling back at her, "I am going to have a baby!"

"Congratulations, Rangiku-san," whispered Hisagi, taking a seat, "I am glad to see you so happy."

"Yes," said Nanao sitting down on the bed next to her, "Congratulations, I can't even remember the last time I saw you this happy."

Rangiku smiled, "I don't think I have been this happy since the day I met Gin and he said I could come live with him. But it makes sense because back then I became really happy because I was not going to be alone anymore and I was getting a friend. Now, now I am getting a baby and..." tears welled up in her eyes, "And through it I'll always have my friend. Even after..." she sobbed, prompting Nanao to pull her close and start to gently stroke her hair, "Even after he's burnt away," Hisagi said nothing, but reached for her hand nearest to him to gently hold

Hitsugaya's reaction when he found out was characteristicly cool, "I fear for the future of Squad ten," he said calmly.

"What do you mean, captain?" demanded Matsumoto.

"You are bad enough, I can just imagine the kind of havoc any child of yours will wreck on my poor squad," he declared.

"Captain is so mean!" cried Matsumoto, "I was going to see if Captain Unohana would let me come help for a few hours a day, now that I am feeling a little better, but after that... you can keep doing the paperwork by yourself."

"O no," said Hitsugaya, "If you are feeling well enough to go around making babies you are coming back to work ASAP. In fact, you can report to work starting tomorrow. 9 o'clock sharp!"

"Captain!" said Matsumoto pulling a look of hurt worry, "I am in a very delicate condition! I can't go back to work full-time now!"

"Don't worry, I'll make sure you have nothing but paperwork to do. That shouldn't strain you at all!" said Hitsugaya with a perfectly straight face, although his eyes shone with glee.

"Captain!"

* * *

_8 months before the execution_

Captain Unohana wouldn't let Rangiku enter his cell anymore. She was concerned about the effect the room might have on the embryo. What it meant was Gin and Rangiku had to content themselves to talking to each other across the threshold of the open door. She couldn't come in, he couldn't come out. Gin could not get over the irony of the open door, "It's like they are mocking us," he told her, during one of her visits.

"Who are they?" she wondered, "If you mean the other captains, then you are wrong. None of them are that sadistic."

Gin changed the subject, he didn't want to upset her, "What's it like being back at work?"

"Unbelievably tedious and boring. All I do is paperwork all day long. Only time I leave the office is to either come here or to return to the Sougou Kyuugo Tsumesho."

"Captain four still insisting on ya spend'n the night there?" wondered Gin, Rangiku nodded, "She must be really worried."

"I think she is being over cautious," said Rangiku, "But I am not about to argue with her. She's the expert! No I am going to do everything and anything she tells me to. I don't want to lose this baby."

"Ya won't, Rangiku," Gin assured her, "I am sure ya'll have a nice healthy, beautiful baby girl. Who'll look jus' like 'er mom."

"What if I want a son who looks just like his father," wondered Rangiku.

"Nay, don' wish that!" said Gin, "I don' wan' my decisions screw'n up my kids life. If the kid looks like ya, they might forget I had a hand in its make'n. If the kid look like me... well..." Rangiku looked sad but couldn't contradict him. She found herself wondering how her friend would treat a child that looked more like Gin and less like her. She hoped that they would love the child still, if only because they loved her.

* * *

_7 months before the execution_

Kira stood among what remained of Las Noches, face to face with the former espada Neliel Tu Ōderushuvanku, "Thank you for agreeing to see me," he said with a slight bow, "Neliel."

"Think nothing of it," replied Nel with her good natured smile, "And call me Nel. Everyone does," she said, "Now come one! We'll go to my palace. It's still in one piece, thank goodness. It seems Harribel, the arrancar who replaced me as number three, made her own and so mine was pretty much used as a storage area. But my brothers have cleared it and it's back to being home!" she explained as she led the way, "So you are a friend of Ichigo's? How is he?"

"I didn't get to see him before I left the living world for Heuco Mundo," Kira explained, "But Urahara-san tells me he's doing well."

"That's good to hear. I hope he is treating Orihime well. Ichigo has no manners with the ladies sometimes. I mean, he didn't even know that no matter how heavy a lady is you have to tell her she is light!" she declared, "How is Renji? My brother Dondochakka has been asking about him. I hope he is well."

"He is," Kira assured her, "He is very busy with his duties as the Vice-captain of squad six. He is keen to be promoted to a captain but he isn't as proficient with his bankai as a captain should be and Captain Kuchiki, that's his captain, thinks he also needs more experience as a Vice-captain. Abarai-kun agrees and is working very hard to master his bankai and prove himself as a captain class officer."

"That's great!" said Nel, "I am sure he'll do just fine. He's a good guy, Renji, I like him," they talked on about random things till they reached her palace, "Guys! Where are you? Our guest is here!"

"They went out to get food for dinner," said Grimmjaw, "But they left some salad and other chamois food for you and the shinigami."

"O haha very funny," said Nel in slight irritation, "I don't suppose you to know each other."

"Grimmjaw the sixth espada," said Kira, "I have heard of him, this is my first time meeting him. Indeed, I wasn't expecting to meet him."

"Why am I here?" wondered Grimmjaw of Nel.

"Well, Izuru here wanted to hear what Ichimaru-sama was like while he was over here. So I thought I would get you to come over too," explained Nel, "Besides, it's not like you had anything better to do!"

"I had things to kill," protested Grimmjaw.

"I am sure they can wait," said Nel with conviction, "Now come on! Let's go enjoy some nice green salads," she said as she led the way to a nicely fitted out drawing room, "Now, what do you want to know about Ichimaru-sama?" wondered Nel.

"More importantly, why are you bothering with ol' foxface anyway?" asked Grimmjaw, "Hasn't he been executed yet?"

"No, his execution date is approximately seven months away," said Kira, "He was my captain. I want to know why he did the things he did. I was hoping that by talking to you I would be able to understand him better. I mean, you saw a side of him I did not."

"Feh, now I know I am wasting my time," said Grimmjaw, "Listen Shinigami, there is no arrancar alive who can tell you about Ichimaru Gin. Foxface kept mostly to himself. Most of us only saw him during meetings or in the throne room with Aizen. I don't think he really liked us and the feeling was mutual. Almost all the arrancar were uncomfortable around him. I never got him. Why the hell did he smile all the time? What the hell was so funny?"

"I always thought he found life funny," said Nel getting a really innocent look on her face, "You know like we were all just acting in a play and the play was a comedy or something."

"Feh, what a moronic thing to say," said Gimmjaw.

Sensing that things might go off-course, "You said no arrancar alive could tell me about Ichimaru Gin. Does that mean, there used to be arrancar who would consider him a friend?"

"Not freaking likely," said Grimmjaw, "Not unless you can be friends with someone by talking shit with them all day. See there was this arrancar, Luppi. Aizen had him replace me as the sexta Espada after Tosen took my arm off. Luppi was disgustingly talkative, sarcastic and mocking. He didn't have Ichimaru's aptitude for sarcasm or polite mockery but I think Ichimaru found him amusing or was just relieved to have someone to talk to. They hang-out together. I don't think they were sharing secrets or anything. As I said, they just talked shit. Anyway Luppi wasn't around for long. I taught that talkative basterd his place as soon as that girl restored my arm. Say Shinigami, I don't suppose Soul Society is willing to give Tosen to me to play with? I would make sure he dies screaming," he said with a predatory glint in his eyes.

"No I don't think so," said Kira, slightly disgusted, "So, Captain had no friends here?"

"Nope," said Grimmjaw, "And no one really liked him either. Not even Luppi. But Szayel Aporro seemed to have a thing for him."

"Szayel Aporro Granz? The eighth espada?" asked Kira.

"Yep, flamboyant is too tame a word for Szayel Aporro," said Grimmjaw, "I mean his zanpakuto was called Fornicarás for crying out loud! He was always hitting on Ichimaru. Offering him a taste of his fraccion, asking him if he wanted to go on a tour of his palace and one time, and I swear this is true, he surprised Ichimaru by coming down on a swing made of rose vines in his resurrected form offering to make a doll of Ichimaru."

"What?" wondered a disturbed, confused and somewhat horrified Kira, "What was he trying to do to my captain!" he demanded.

"Szayel Aporro had some very nasty abilities," explained Nel, "His modified his fraccion so that if he ate them it would heal his injuries. In his resurrected form he had the ability to make a voodoo doll of a person and use it to toy with them. If those were the methods by which he was coming on to Ichimaru-sama there is little wonder he was not successful. I mean, his palace was one of the most horrible places to visit. It was so full of traps! Who would want to go for a walk there!"

"Which is why he didn't succeed!" said Grimmjaw dismissively, "In fact, after the rose swing incident Aizen called him into his throne room and informed Szayel that Ichimaru had a girl back in Soul Society and she was the only person Ichimaru would ever touch," Grimmjaw started laughing, "Szayel asked Aizen if he was willing to use his Kyōka Suigetsu on Ichimaru," he started howling with laughter, "Aizen told him to get out and to never, ever mention such a perverted use for his Kyōka Suigetsu ever again!"

"Your joking!" cried Nel, "There is no way Szayel would ever say that! And how do you know what Aizen said to Szayel anyway!"

"Ulquiorra," said Grimmjaw by way of explanation, "That's how I know it's all true. Ulquiorra didn't have the imagination to make something like that up. He also didn't normally gossip but he was so disturbed by the exchange that he couldn't stop talking about it. Don't think Ulquiorra had much happening down there and so that stuff was totally beyond his understanding."

It took Kira a little while to get over the shock of finding out that his captain had been sexually harassed by a perverted espada, "So what did captain do here?" he wondered when he had recovered a bit, "Did he have any duties?"

"He liked to play with the corridor controls. See the halls of Las Noches could be moved around and he liked to do it just for kicks. It was kind of annoying," said Grimmjaw, "One minute everything is fine and the next minute you can't find the bathroom. I suppose Ichimaru was the kind of person who got off on stuff like that."

"While I was an espada," said Nel, "And that was many, many years ago now. Ichimaru-sama would help Aizen-sama with his experiments. He was still a lieutenant back then I think. I am not sure of the time frame because it's hard to tell time in Heuco Mundo but I think he was made captain shortly before I left. I don't think he came as often to Las Noches after he become captain. But while he was still Aizen-sama's lieutenant he came whenever Aizen-sama came. He always seemed kind of lonely to me. Never really talked much except to Aizen-sama. Back then there weren't too many arrancar about and some of them had been around since Aizen-sama first came to Hueco Mundo, over a hundred years ago now. They said that when Ichimaru-sama was young he would get sick every time he came to Hueco Mundo. They said that Aizen-sama made the false sunlight inside the dome of Las Noches for Ichimaru-sama, so he wouldn't get sick so much. I don't know if it's true or not. But he did get dangerously ill once," said Nel.

She paused for a few minutes, seemingly to gather her thought, "Yes, they did move him when he got sick. Moved him to a palace with a large veranda and lots of windows. No arrancar was allowed near him, not sure why. Either Aizen-sama thought that one of us would try to harm him while he was weak. A distinct possibility given the survival of the fittest mentality many arrancar have," she said giving a significant look to Grimmjaw much to his annoyance.

"Don't put me in the same boat as that dick Nnoitra," he growled out.

Nel smiled and continued, "Alternatively it really was arrancar reitsu that was making Ichimaru-sama sick and that's why we weren't allowed near him. He was however made to lie in the sunlight out on the veranda and I remember seeing Aizen-sama sit with him for hours and hours, talking and taking care of him. I almost believed Aizen-sama cared but then I thought to myself if he cared why was he keeping Ichimaru-sama here? Why not send him back to Soul Society? Aizen-sama was no healer, he had knowledge of healing but that's not the same as an actual healer. Certainly if lack of sunlight and arrancar reitsu was the problem, surely Soul Society would be a better place for Ichimaru-sama to get better. Not here. It didn't make sense," said Nel, "It still doesn't make sense."

"Feh, what makes sense anyway?" demanded Grimmjaw, "I mean, how does this... this scene make sense! You are a hollow, I am a hollow and here we are sitting chatting to a shinigami over a plate of salad!"

"The salad is very good isn't it?" asked Nel, offering some more to Kira.

"Ah... thank you, yes it's good," said Kira awkwardly, accepting some more salad, "If I cared about someone then I would do everything in my power to help them if they got sick," continued Kira, "That would make sense and if something as simple as them being sent away to a different place form me would help. I would do it. That's what makes sense to me."

"That makes sense to me too," said Nel with a sweet smile.

"Feh, you two aren't selfish. Aizen was. His actions make perfect sense to me," said Grimmjaw dismissively, "Now unless you want to fight or something Shinigaim I am leaving! Anymore time spent smelling salad or this chamois and I am serious going to kill myself," with that he left.

"Umm... why did he keep going on about a chamois?" wondered Kira.

"My zanpakuto is Gamuz which means chamois," explained Nel, "Grimmjaw's is pantera which means panther. He likes to go on about how I am a prey and he's a predator," she explained, "He's really not a bad guy underneath it all," she assured Kira who shot her a skeptical look, "It's true! Just loves fighting way too much. Now," she said smiling in her childlike manner, "Is there anything else you want to know? I mean, I think I have told you all I can about Ichimaru-sama."

"No I think I have heard enough. Thank you," said Kira, as he got upto leave, "Thank you for seeing me and thank you too for finding Grimmjaw. It was an interesting discussion."

"You're welcome," she said getting up also, "You know," she added almost as an after thought, "I never really understood what Ichimaru-sama was doing here. He didn't seem to really fit in. Did he fit into the Gotei 13?" she wondered, "Did he have friends in Soul Society?"

"He had Matsumoto Rangiku," replied Kira, "He also had me but I doubt he cared about me," he added a little sadly before taking his leave.

* * *

**Author's note:** I am sorry there was no other way to do this chapter without having Nel and Grimmjaw out of character (at least I think they are out of character... I don't pay too close an attention to their character so I really can't tell). I hope it wasn't too bad. A lot of the things talked about in this chapter came from the Arrancar Encyclopedia segments. Anyone else notice how Szayel Aporro hits on Ichimaru everytime he turns up in the encyclopedia segments and Ichimaru has that "get away from me you pervert" look on his face? I found those three segments hilarious! Hmm... this is the longest chapter yet... well things are hurtling towards the finish. I was thinking this wouldn't go on for more then twelves chapters. But by my calculations that won't do. I am thinking I need at least five more chapters to do a proper job of the stories left to tell... thanks for sticking with me so far! Hope you'll stay with me till the end! 


	12. Chapter 12

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_50 years after the execution_

They say sweating is good for cleansing pours and for good, healthy, glowing skin. If that truly is the case then the new recruits of squad eleven where on their way to great skin. Every single one of them were sweating profusely as their Vice-captain slowly walked down the line inspecting them. She was a tall woman, with long waist length bubble-gum pink hair. She was quiet beautiful but she had a formidable look on her face. Her reitsu was terrifying and there was a rumor floating around that both the vice-captain and the third seat had Bankai. The recruits didn't know the truth of the matter but what they did know was that they didn't want to find out. If the vice-captain's reitsu and her position was not frightening enough, she was also married to Kuchiki Byakuya. Which didn't only make her a noble, it made her the reigning hime of one of the four great noble houses. No, one in their right mind wanted to get on the wrong side of Vice-captain Kuchiki Yachiru of the Eleventh Squad.

Thou her face didn't show it Yachiru was severely disappointed with this year's recruits. Ken-chan would be severely disappointed in this crop of weaklings. Indeed the only one who would impress Ken-chan was, "Shunsui!" she screamed in sheer annoyance, "What are you doing here?"

"I am here to join the squad," said Shunsui smiling Gin's trademark eyes closed grin, "See, I even have an uniform."

"Is that my old uniform?" wondered Yachiru, "Where did you get that?"

"Byakuya-san gave it to me when I told him I wanted to come join the squad with this year's recruits. Said if I could fit into your old uniform, it meant that I was old enough to join because I would be about the same size you were when you joined," he declared confidently.

Yachiru found herself rubbing her temple, Byakuya was going to pay for this, "Shunsui you can't join our squad!"

"Why not?" demanded Shunsui with an adorable pout, "I am stronger then all of them," he said pointing to the recruits.

"None of them are the only son of the Captain-commander!" Yachiru pointed out, "The last thing Ken-chan and I need is Shun-shun breathing down our necks."

"Daddy won't mind," Shunsui assured her, "Come on, Vice-captain Kuchiki-dono."

"O yes he will, in fact, Nana will make sure he minds," said Yachiru, "And since when do you called me Vice-captain Kuchiki or Kuchiki-dono and I am pretty sure called me Vice-captain and adding the suffix -dono is over doing it."

"Come on Yachiru-chan," said Shunsui, "You know I would be great!"

"O now I am Yachiru-chan again," said Yachiru, "Well the answer is still no!"

Shunsui eyes opened and they started tearing up, "Well we could let him join for a little while, Vice-captain," offered Ikkaku, his heart melting at the sight of the tears.

"Shut it Q-ball," said Yachiru in increasing irritation, "Look, if you want to join a squad already why don't you join Bya-kun's? He's a really nice Captain!" she offered.

"But he's not as fun as Captain Zaraki and his Vice-captain isn't as nice to look at," said Shunsui with an utterly cute smile on his face.

"He's like a male version of Matsumoto," whispered Ikkaku to Yumichka.

Yumichka nodded, "That boy is going to break hearts left, right and center when he grows-up. Just imagine the devastation."

"I would hate to have him as a competition," declared Ikkaku.

"If you want a nice looking Vice-captain called Kuchiki and a fun captain, how about squad thirteen?" offered Yachiru.

"No way!" said a horrified Shunsui, "Rukia-chan is always trying to dress me up like a bunny rabbit!"

"That's because you make a beautiful bunny rabbit," Yumichka piped in, "You look so adorable with those ears and that little fluffy tail!"

"I do not!" declared Shunsui, "Besides Ukitake-san says I need to be older to join his squad," said Shunsui, "But I don't want to wait! I want to join now! O please, please Yachiru-chan, can't I join you guys?" shooting her his best and cutest look.

"O no," declared Yachiru, "You may have Foxy's look with Shun-shun's charm but they are not going to work on me!"

"Foxy?" wondered Shunsui looking a little confused.

The blood drained from Yachiru's face as she realized her mistake. Behind her both Madarame and Yumichka visibly flinched. They were all mercifully distracted by the entrance of Kenpachi, "Hey," he said as he entered, "So these are the new recruits. Listen up I..."

"Ken-chan," interrupted Yachiru, "Tell Shunshui he can't stay!"

"He can't?" asked a puzzled Kenpachi, "Why not?"

"Because he's too young to join our squad!" said Yachiru, getting increasingly frustrated.

"He is?" wondered Kenpachi.

"Yes!" yelled Yachiru, "Oh! Never mind," turning back to Shunsui, "You cannot join us. Not yet. Ran-chan would not have wanted her only son to enter the Gotei 13 so early," or _Foxy for that matter_. She added to herself, _They both would have wanted their only son to have a carefree life as long as possible. The kind of life people like them, people like me, kids from the hellish districts of Rukongai could never have._

* * *

_6 months before the execution_

"Yay! Ran-chan is having a baby! Yay!" cried Yachiru as she jumped-up to hug Rangiku, "I am going to have so much fun playing with it! You are going to let me play with it, won't you? Won't you, Ran-chan?"

"Of course," replied Rangiku, "You and Kenpachi can babysit whenever you want."

"Yay! Ken-chan is good with babies! He's had lots of practice with me!" Yachiru assured her.

"Perhaps we should have a baby shower," suggested Nemu in her quiet manner, "I have already requested Mayuri-sama to help me make a kitsune themed pajama set."

"Captain Kurotsuchi is handy with a needle?" asked Rangiku in some surprise.

Nemu nodded, "He often sews on name tags to my cloths."

"So that's why all your name tags say 'fat sow'," said Rangiku, Nemu nodded.

"A baby shower is a great idea," said Yachiru, then after a minute's thought, "What's a baby shower?"

Rangiku laughed as Nemu answered, "It's a party where an expectant mother's friends gives her presents for the baby; like cloths, cots and things like that."

"A party is a great idea! I'll get started right away!" with that she rushed off to find Ikkaku and Yumichka to bully them into helping her plan the perfect party for Rangiku.

"I should also be leaving," said Nemu getting up, "Congratulations Matsumoto Rangiku, you'll make a great mother."

"Thanks Nemu," replied Rangiku with a smile, Nemu really was such a nice girl. Speaking of nice girls, Rangiku was a little surprised Hinamori hadn't come to see her. In fact, she was the only person from the Shinigami women's association who hadn't visited yet. Well Kiyone hadn't yet either but she was expecting her, Ukitake and Kyoraku soon. But Hinamori... she supposed that she wasn't all that close to Hinamori to begin with but she still had expected a visit from her fellow Vice-captain and Shinigami Women's association member. A well, there was still lots of time and she was probably very busy running Squad five.

Just as Rangiku finished her thought there was a knock on the door, "Why did you do that, Ukitake?" she heard Kyoraku say, "I was hoping to catch Rangiku-chan while she was not decent."

"Captain!" came Nanao's voice.

Rangiku laughed, "The door's open," she called, they entered to find her sitting upright on her bed, "I don't know if you want to see me naked now Captain Kyoraku, I am getting pretty fat," she said pointing to her belly, which in truth only had a slight swell.

"Fat, thin, I don't discriminate," returned Kyoraku.

"Captain!" screamed Nanao.

Kiyone and Ukitake laughed, "How are you doing Matsumoto-kun?" asked Ukitake.

"I am alright," said Rangiku, "I have been feeling very weak recently and so I have been confined to bed since last week. But Captain Unohana says there is nothing to worry about. She says that I am probably not eating enough or getting enough sleep."

"That's no good," said Kiyone, "Is something the matter? Is it the mess food? I mean squad ten mess food isn't bad but it isn't great either, our mess is very good though. If you like I'll bring you food from our mess everyday!"

Rangiku smiled, "Thanks Kiyone but no I haven't actually been eating a lot at the squad ten mess. I have mostly been taking my meals here in the Sougou Kyuugo Tsumesho," she explained, "No, I just can't keep anything down. I eat tons and have all these strange cravings but as soon as the food goes down, it comes back up again," she sighed, "Never have babies Kiyone!"

"Don't say that," said Ukitake, "I am sure when the baby get's here you'll be well rewarded for your pain."

"Ukitake is right," said Kyoraku, "But if you want something special to eat, let me and Nanao-chan know. We have great cooks in squad eight."

"They better be good given what we pay them," commented Nanao, "Now, what is this about a baby shower? Yachiru invited us when she ran into us while on our way here," they continued talking in the same vain for the rest of their visit.

* * *

He woke drenched in cold sweat, the words "I don' wanna die, I don' wanna die," repeating endlessly in his head, echoing inside his skull. He took deep breaths to calm himself, he was not doing well. He hated not being able to hold Rangiku. He hated not being able to touch her, kiss her, bury his face in her ample bosoms and tell her all his fears regarding the execution that was drawing ever closer. He hated it and if he was given a choice he would keep her with him in the cell, to hell with the health of the baby. Ichimaru smiled to himself, it was an infinitely good thing that he was not the one making the calls. Selfish creature that he was, he would end up hurting her again. He didn't want that. He didn't want to leave misery in his wake, "Please be alright, Rangiku," he whispered to himself, "Please be alright and come see me soon. Please."

* * *

When Kira found Zaraki Kenpachi he was on his way out of Seireitei, heading towards Rukongai through the west gate, "Captain Zaraki," said Kira timidly, "If you have a minute, I had a quick question."

"Out with it then," barked Zaraki.

"Wha... what's the House?" asked Kira and before he knew what was happening Zaraki's zanpakuto rested against his neck.

"Why the hell do you want to know?" demanded Zaraki, "Depending on your answer, I might not kill you."

"Mat... Matsumoto-san mentioned it," said Kira quickly, "She said that Captain Ichimaru once stopped her from living with some children who didn't have spiritual power because he was afraid she would end up in the House. But I think she did end up there just before she and Captain Ichimaru joined the Gotei 13 and I was just wondering what it was."

Zaraki gave him an assessing stare before slowly removing his zanpakuto, "The House," Zaraki said, "Is a place perverts go to find children on whom to practice their perversion," Kira's eyes widened. He was surprised, no shocked. It was not so much Kira didn't know such perversions existed in the world. Just that born and raise in Seireitei, it was not a something that would occur to him as an obvious thing as Matsumoto had clearly expected it to.

"That would explain a few thing," said Zaraki mostly to himself, looking unusually thoughtful, "He hated them, Ichimaru that is. He had a real vendetta against the people who run those things. Every time we would bust up one of those places, he made a point of killing every single one of them slowly and painfully. Didn't really suit my style. It's no fun cutting weaklings. If I have to kill 'em, I like to make it quick and clean. Ichimaru's savagery made me wonder if he had something personal against the Houses. Always wondered if he spent sometime in one. But I guess the girl makes more sense."

"Wait, wait!" cried Kira, "You and Captain Ichimaru used to go shut down places like that?" he exclaimed.

"Didn't I just say that?" demanded an annoyed Kenpachi, "I ain't a beacon of morality or anything but I can't stand people hurting children and the children in the Houses are some of the most hurt and messed up creatures you'll find anywhere. Even before I joined the Gotei 13 I used to bust-up any Houses I used to run across. After I joined I started getting a list of the Houses from the Onmitsukidō. They keep track of them and ran raids on them from time to time. It ain't enough of course. You shut down one in one place, another springs up some place else. But doesn't mean you stop cutting. Plus the Onmitsukidō hardly ever raids the Houses in districts 79 and 80. So a few of times a year, I go out there and bust-up all the Houses I can. I don't like brining Yachiru but Madarame and Yumichka comes with me sometimes. But I prefer having Retsu with me. She knows what to do once we get the kids out. Couldn't get her this time though," he said looking back towards squad four, "She's busy, a pity really. I am not good with the kids."

"But didn't you say that Captain Ichimaru used to go with you?" Kira reminded him.

"It happened by accident," replied Kenpachi, "One time he and I just ended up in the same place at the same time. I don't remember us talking but we understood each other and decided to bust-up the place together. After that, every time I headed out alone he would come out of nowhere and fall into step with me. He never showed up when I was with the others. Especially Retsu, I think he's scared of her. Almost everyone is."

Kira's brain seemed to jam. He couldn't begin to process this new bit of information, this new side of his captain. How... how could he have not known? Zaraki Kenpachi was one of the few captain's his captain actually got along with. Why had it not occurred to him that they might be sharing something. Although this was beyond his wildest imagination. Kenpachi started to walk away, "Captain Zaraki!" called Kira.

"What now?" he demanded.

"Are you going out there now?" he wondered.

"Yeah."

"Can I come with you?" asked Kira hopefully.

"Suit yourself," with that Kenpachi started walking and Kira fell into step besides him.

* * *

_50 years after the execution_

Zaraki Kenpachi was on his way out of Seireitei, heading towards Rukongai through the west gate. As he got closer to the gate a figure emerged from the shadows and fell into step beside him, "Have you got the list?" Kenpachi asked of his companion.

"Yes," said Kira, holding up a piece of paper.

"Good," said Zaraki, "Now let's get going. Yachiru will kill me if I am not back in time for her and Byakuya's anniversary. Although why she married that kido using weakling is beyond me."

Kira smiled, "He was the only person who wasn't scared of you or her for that matter," he pointed out.

"Feh, he's scared of her now," said Kenpachi with a nasty smirk.

* * *

**Author's note: **Ok hear me out! First time we see Ichimaru he's with Kenpachi and they seemed to have come to talk to Byakuya together. Apart from Kenpachi Ichimaru hasn't been shown to be remotely friendly to anyone else. So... I kind of built on that. Yes I am a master at making mountains out of mole hills. :) Thanks for reading, I hope you guys are still enjoying this.

Also the Nemu and Mayuri thing comes from this funny bit at the end of chapter 227 .com/Bleach/227/20/ It was translated as "fat sow" in my Viz translation.


	13. Chapter 13

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_6 months before the execution_

Kira threw-up after the first House they hit. It was a particularly seedy establishment that kept the children locked in a rancid basement. Kenpachi was not phased, nor was he surprised at Kira's reaction, "It can get a lot worse then this," he informed Kira, "So if you don't have the stomach for it, might as well return to the Seireitei now. Most hollows have nothing on some humans."

"How did these people even come to Soul Society?" Kira wondered, "Why aren't they in hell?"

"Good question," said Kenpachi, "But the answer isn't simple. Some died before they did anything bad enough in the living world to warrant a trip to hell. Others would have kept to the straight and narrow path if they were in one of the law abiding districts but because they are in shit holes like Zaraki they have given into their baser instincts. Happens a lot around here. Hell half the kids we rescued today might grow-up into the animals that caged them. That happens a lot too."

By the time they hit their fifth House, Kira had developed a barrier between himself and awful things he saw. This barrier was not shaken until their tenth House, the last house Kenpachi intended to hit on that outing but when they got there they found the place already raised to the ground. An old blind women sat next to the still smoking pile, "So you have come," she said as she heard them approach, "I heard you were coming. I considered trying to run but I doubted I would get away. Even if Kenpachi of Zaraki didn't give chase, I figured you would Ichimaru."

"What the hell..." started Kenpachi but Kira stopped him with a slight touch of his arm. Indeed Kenpachi was silenced out of sheer surprise. Kira was a stickler for manners and etiquette, for him to touch a superior officer, especially someone like Kenpachi, was a very big deal.

"I don't suppose you remember me, do you?" the woman continued, "Why would you? After all, I am just trash. That's what you called me and my friends that day. The day Rangiku saved us from those men. Do you remember? We asked her to stay with us, but you wouldn't let her. You told her that she was too pretty and not trash. You told her that we were just trying to use her and that we would sell her out to those men to save our skin. You were wrong!" she yelled, "Back then we didn't think like that. She was nice. That's all we cared about. Her power would have kept us safe but we would never have sold out a friend. Never! But you wouldn't let her stay and we got caught. Not that day but soon after. They took us to one of the worst Houses in all of Soul Society! It was a living hell and every moment I spent there I thought about how I might not have been here if you had let her stay with us. She wanted to, I could tell she wanted to. But you threaten to drag her away and you would have too! That look in your eyes. You would have killed us all to keep her away from us. You are the worst kind of hypocrite!" she cried.

By now Kenpachi was both bored and very confused. Kira on the other hand knew exactly what was she was saying. He could hear clearly the voice of Matsumoto Rangiku in his head saying, _Gin rarely took me with him on his trips. The few times we did, we went to a market town that was about two days journey from where we lived. Every time we went he would hold on to my hand so tightly... but one day, one day we lost each other in the crowd. As I frantically looked for him I ran into a group of children who were struggling against a group of men, screaming for them to let them go. It's wasn't the kind of thing I could ignore. So I jumped in, not that I had great control over it but I could manifest a pretty decent ball of spirit energy and could lob it rather well too. It was enough to scare off the men and enough to tell Gin where I was. He came running and as soon as he did, he grabbed my hand and started pulling me away. But the other children grabbed my other hand and started to thank me for saving them. They wanted me to stay with them, but Gin wouldn't let me and said "They are trash Rangiku and more trash piled together ain't gonna keep 'em any safer. They want ya cause you ain't trash. Ya can protect them and if ya can't... ya are so much prettier, they'll go fer ya first and give these trash time ta escape. They just wanna use ya. We ain't staying with 'em, ya ain't staying with 'em. I'll take ya back home even if I have ta drag ya," I had never seen this part of Gin before. The hard edge in his voice, the dangerous and dark look on his face... the children started to protest but one look from him and the words just died in their throats, just like they died in mine. "We're leave'n," with that he led me out of the town, "Don' ever come here without me, Rangiku. Ever."_

"You wouldn't save me and my friend but these children," she made gestured towards the burnt house, "For them, you would slit my throat! They were trash too, Ichimaru! Not a drop of spirit energy between them, so why do you save them!"

Kira had a horrible sinking feeling in his stomach but it was Kenpachi who voice what Kira was thinking, "You burnt the kids!" he roared, drawing his zanpakuto, "You bitch!"

"Yes kill me," said the woman, sounding broken, "Or rather, if you please Kenpachi, let that hypocrite kill me. He didn't think I was worth saving twice, so let him kill me at least."

It was then that Kira spoke, "Captain Ichimaru Gin is not here," he said, "I am Kira Izuru, Vice-captain of third Squad."

"You lie! I can smell him. Persimmon and Chrysanthemums," said the woman, "I know that scent. It's been burnt into my memory since that night! The night he came to get her but left the rest of us to rot!"

"The captain planted many persimmon and chrysanthemum trees in his private garden after he became captain of the third company. My room, like his, adjoins the gardens. The scent has permeated almost all that I own," Kira explained, "I repeat Captain Ichimaru is not here but these are your last moments. It seem clear that you wise to unburden yourself. What is it that you have against my captain that you did something so atrocious as burning children alive, for I have no doubt those children were alive when you set this house on fire."

The look on the old woman's face was a strange mix of disbelief, grief, rage, sadness and resignation, "The House they took me and my friend to was run by a shinigami," she began abruptly, startling both Kira and Kenpachi, "I am not sure how THAT came about. But that's what happened. It was a long time ago now. The bastard is long dead. I heard he died during a mission or something. Not that it matters but that night, more then a century ago now, he was right here. In this very house as a matter of fact. I remember that night so clearly. It was the last night I ever saw. I remember being in my little cell and hearing excited voice...

* * *

"O she is a looker!" came the thick slurrying voice, "Good catch boss, very good catch. Wonder if she is a virgin. She would really fetch a pretty penny if she was. Let me check..."

"Don't touch me!" screamed the little girl.

"What's your name?" came a cool measured voice.

"I don't have to tell you anything!" said the girl, "Let go of me or you'll be sorry!"

The men laughed, "Listen girly," said the thick slurry voice, "You clearly have some power but you are no match for the boss. He's a trained Shinigami. Just be quiet and answer the questions, then maybe we won't have to hurt you."

"You say a lot of unnecessary things, Bokka," chastised the calm voice, "I'll ask you again girl, what's your name?"

"Matsumoto Rangiku," she answered, her voice small and petrified.

"That's a nice name," said the calm voice, "Now tell me little girl, do you live with anyone?"

"Gin, Ichimaru Gin," she replied.

"Oh! I know that little shit," said Bokka, "Bad news boss. That little thug is really bad news. He has a real sadistic streak and the power to back it up too! Most of the boys have a scar or two from him. I didn't think that little shit had someone like her tucked away in whatever trash heap he lives in. Wonder if he's going to come looking for her."

"It doesn't matter, I doubt the boy is going to come looking for her here. How would he know? I doubt a dog from Rukongai would have any sort of detection skills. Still I find it amazing that you and the boys have had trouble from him."

"Not me!" protested Bokka, "Just some of the boys, most of them don't have spiritual power and Ichimaru has tons. It would be really good boss if you could kill the little shit before you went back."

"No!" screamed Rangiku, "Don't hurt Gin, please!"

"Shut it girl! Don't make me gag you!" warned Bokka.

"I don't have the time to take care of your little problem Bokka. Both the Captain and Vice-captain have become wary of me. They know I am up to something and are just waiting to catch me out. I am actually surprised I have been able to get away with my little side business for so long. Fortunately for me the Captain is overly suspicious of the vice-captain and spends most of his time watching him. Captain thinks the Vice-captain's up to something. Wish I knew what it was. I could use it against him if I ever had to. No luck there though."

"Want me to ask around?" wondered Bokka, "Who know, might be this Vice-captain is into the same business we are."

"I doubt that very much. Aizen isn't the type. But enough of that. Leave Seireitei business to me. You just get ready to move when you get the word from me. Those Onmitsukidō bastards are getting closer and closer to finding us."

Bokka laughed, "Great thing you are in the messenger squad."

"Best place from which to luanch a conspiracy or run an illegal operation," agreed the man, "I better get going. Keep the girl safe. I am sure I'll have a buyer lined up for her very, very soon."

* * *

"But they never got a chance to do anything to Rangiku," said the old woman, "That night he came for her. Tore through the place looking for her. Lobbing spirit energy indiscriminately. Not caring who got hurt. He was the reason I lost my eyes!" she screamed, "Last thing I saw was a bright flash of spiritual power, last thing I heard was his frantic screams for her. When I woke up, they were gone and so was my sight. Don't I have the right to hate the hypocrite."

"That's the stupidest thing I have ever heard," declared Kenpachi, "You held a grudge against a man who couldn't save you as a kid? That's beyond pathetic."

"It's not that he couldn't," protested the old woman, "He wouldn't!"

"He couldn't," said Kenpachi firmly, "Neither of them could when they were that young and didn't even have their zanpakutos. If that's the reason you burnt those kids tonight, to spite Ichimaru for not doing something he couldn't do back a hundred years ago, then," Kenpachi raised his sword, "Your beyond forgiveness," with that he swung down cutting the woman cleanly from head to toe.

Kira however paid it no attention. His mind was working frantically as an important piece of the Ichimaru puzzle feel into place, "Captain Zaraki," he said, "I have to go back to Seireitei. There is something I have to ask Captain."

"Whatever," replied Zaraki, Kira turned to leave when he added, "Kira, not that I care but you should watch in front of whom you call Ichimaru, Captain."

"Thank you for your advice, Captain," whispered Kira, "I'll try to follow it," with that headed for Seireitei as fast as he could.

* * *

It was the middle of the night when he reached the special cells. He didn't care, he had to know and he had to know now. Swiftly he entered to room and found Ichimaru sitting on his bed playing with one of his mechanical puzzles, "Well ain't this a surprise," he said, grinning widely, "What brings ya 'ere at this time of the night, Izuru?" he wondered, "And after ya have been away fer, what was it, a week?"

"You joined the fifth squad to kill to the third seat," he said without a shadow of a doubt.

"Excuse me?" asked a startled Ichimaru, his eyes opening in shock.

"You heard me," replied Kira impatiently, "The third seat, he was the one in-charge of the House that they took Matsumoto-san to. That night he mentioned Aizen. Aizen has never been in any squad other then the fifth. Matsumoto-san... Matsumoto-san must have told you that the Shinigami in charge of the House mentioned Aizen. So you joined the squad with Vice-captain Aizen but... how did you know it was the third seat?" he wondered.

Ichimaru's eyes closed and his smile returned, "My, my haven' ya been busy, Izuru," he said. Then he paused, long enough for Kira to wonder if his question was going to go unanswered. But then, "I was a pretty cute kid," he said in a matter of fact way, "It wasn' all that hard ta find the right shinigami ta kill."

"So all this started..."

"Because I wanted revenge," said Ichimaru, "Don' go colour'n my actions someth'n noble. They touched my Rangiku. No one touchs my Rangiku, Izuru. No one. I gotta say I lucked out big time with squad five. As soon as I met the third seat I knew who I had ta kill. The look he gave me, Izuru... made my skin crawl. The thought of 'im grabbing my Rangiku, dragging her to that place... I was gonna kill him and to hell with the consequences. But I lucked out. Cap'n Aizen dropped so many hints about me gett'n the third seat if I managed ta kill him, he might as well have come right out and said it. So I killed 'im. Got the third seat and started walk'n behind Cap'n Aizen. Followed 'im all the way ta Heuco Mundo."

"But why?" cried Kira, "They didn't like you, the arrancars and Heuco Mundo made you sick. Why would you stay there?"

"Ya have been busy," commented Ichimaru, sounding exceedingly impressed, "Yer right. None of 'em liked me. But I didn't like 'em either. There was noth'n ta like. They were tools ta be used. Once used they would be destroyed. No point in gett'n attached to 'em."

"Is that how you saw me?" wondered Kira, "A tool to be used and discarded? Was I ever anything to you but a toy to play with?" he demanded.

"Ya have a lot a toys, Izuru?" asked Ichimaru, "Grown-up I mean."

"What does that have anything to do with it?" demanded Kira.

"See I have a theory," Ichimaru explained, "That people who say stuff like that, stuff about just be'n a toy, had a lot of toys grown-up. Me, I had jus' one," he smile turned subtly genuine as he continued, "I had a little stuffed fox. It fit right into the palm of my hand. Don' no where I got it. Jus' always had it. I loved it ta bits. Ever wondered why I am so good at thread'n needles? It cause I use ta have ta repair that ol' thing all the time. It was so fragile but before Rangiku it's all I had ta cuddle. Rangiku never had dolls and wanted ta play with my fox. I used ta let 'er but she was so scared of damaging it that she never dare' have it fer long. One day it fell apart and I couldn' repair it. One of the wors' days of my life, Izuru. Didn' even realize I was cry'n till Rangiku started ta kiss 'em away," he said, "So ya see, Izuru, it don' matter if ya were a toy. It don' mean I wasn' happy ta have ya watch'n my back. It don' mean I wasn't glad ta find ya do'n well without me."

Kira found his arms going around himself in a desperately needed hug, "I was jealous of Hinamori-kun," he confessed, "I was jealous of the fact that Aizen cared enough to want to kill her."

"I ain't as merciful as Cap'n Aizen," came the quite reply.

Kira sobbed, he could feel the tears well-up in his eyes. He didn't care. He had been holding them back ever since his captain left. Even in private he had not indulged in them. He didn't care how pathetic he looked, standing there shedding tears and hugging himself. Suddenly he found himself pulled against his captain's chest, "I ain't very good at this," said Ichimaru as his arms went around Kira in a slightly awkward hug, "Only ever done this with Rangiku and she's padded differently."

"It's fine," Kira whispered, as he fisted hands into Ichimaru's gi and buried his face in his chest and sodded quietly, "It's fine," but it wasn't fine. It wasn't fine and it wasn't fair. Six months, six months and he would lose his captain forever. Lose his captain just when he had found the man behind the smile. No one can ever know another person completely, but Kira felt that he knew his captain just a bit better now. He felt that his captain's heart was just a bit more with him and that was enough to break Kira's heart. Because now, he would feel the inevitable loss of his captain, just that little bit more.

* * *

**Author's note:** This chapter sounded better in my head. I mean, I was really eager to write this chapter but I think I might have messed up, especially about the bit about the old lady. It was originally suppose to be different. She was suppose to be a worker at an orphanage in Seireitei that was founded together by Unohana, Kenpachi and Ichimaru for the kids they saved, on land and building donated by Byakuya's grandfather. But in the end I decided that was a bit much. So the old women ended up being one of the kids who grew up to be twisted. I know it's not exactly novel, the idea that Gin might have had a reason other then the lust for power to kill the 3rd seat of the 5th squad. But I thought I would go with it anyway, if only to have the bit with Kira. I have been thinking about the bit with Gin and Kira for ages as the conclusion to the Kira finding out of about Gin's past portion of the story. Really wanted it to come out right. I really hope people like it. Also the bit about the hearts is borrowed liberally from KT's own translated words .com/read/bleach/1/317/21


	14. Chapter 14

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_50 years after the execution_

"Happy birthday daddy," cried Rangiku as both she and Shunsui jumped onto Kyoraku's futon, "I brought you a present!" she said holding up a sake bottle.

"Where on earth did you get that!" demanded Nanao, who had followed the kids into the room.

"I asked Shuhei-chan to buy it for me, since the shop keeper wouldn't sell it to me," explained Rangiku.

Nanao touched her glasses, "I am going to have to have a talk with Captain Hisagi."

Kyoraku, however, laughed as he sat up, "Relax Nanao-chan, it's not like Hisagi bought it for her to drink," he said as took the sake bottle from Rangiku, "Thank you Rangiku."

"I got you your favorite steamed buns," said Shunsui, "Just the kind to go well with sake."

Kyoraku laughed again, "Sake and buns, my two favorite things in the world after the two of you!" he said as he accepted the buns, putting both aside he grabbed the kids in a warm hug.

Rangiku giggled as Shunsui said, "Happy birthday daddy, we love you."

"And I love the both of you," returned Kyoraku as he gentled kissed each of them on the cheek.

"But you love me more, right?" demanded Rangiku.

"No he doesn't," interjected Nanao before Kyoraku could answer, "He loves the both of you equally, just like a good father should."

"Besides," countered Shunsui, "Everybody knows daddy loves me the most!"

"No he doesn't!" protested Rangiku, "Daddy! Tell Shunsui you don't love him more then you love me!"

Kyoraku laughed, "As Nanao-chan said, I love you both equally with my entire heart."

Rangiku was satisfied and smile, but Shunsui looked puzzled, "That doesn't make sense. How can you love us both with your entire heart equally? That makes it sound like you have two hearts."

"But I do!" declared Kyoraku, "Here's one," he said as he pulled Rangiku to him and kissed her on the top of her head, "and here's another," he said as he pulled Shunsui to him and kissed him on his head, "My two hearts."

The kids giggled and hugged Kyoraku again; but Nanao had a worried frown on her face, _You look like him and you have his mind too_, she thought to herself as she watched little Shunsui, _How long before we have to tell you about him. Please, please don't ever find out. Please don't make us tell you. I don't ever want you to find out about that creepy, sadistic, selfish bastard that _**_she_**_ had loved in violation of all sense and reason. Please, please, please don't ever find out about Ichimaru Gin._

* * *

_5 months before the execution_

"And Captain Kyoraku gave me a beautiful cot and Nanao a set of baby blankets," Matsumoto told Gin, as they lay cuddling on his bed. After much consultation with Captain Kurotsuchi, Captain Unohana had allowed her to spend a few hours a day in Gin's cell. However, her visits were strictly timed and Kira had taken it upon himself to make sure she didn't over stay her allocation. Something she was prone to do when wrapped in Gin's arms.

"Nemu and Captain Kurotsuchi gave me several pairs of Kitsune pajamas," she continued describing her baby shower, "I should have brought them for you to see. They are made of fur like material and the hood has little fox ears! The baby will look like a cute little kitsune in those Pjs!"

"Ya might wanna be careful before ya dress the li'l one in those," said Gin, "Ya never know with Captain Twelve. He Pjs might well turn the baby into a kitsune."

"You know, your right!" said Rangiku, "I'll have Urahara Kisuke check the Pjs before I put it on the baby."

"That's an idea," whispered Gin as he gently rubbed her belly. By his calculations it was extremely touch and go if he would live long enough to see his child. He didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing. He was already having difficulty accepting his impending execution. Every night he would have nightmares of darkness, everlasting, never ending darkness. Fear would grip is heart and he would awaken shaking and sweating. He hated it. Why couldn't he do it? Why couldn't he face death calmly like so many other had? Why? Was it because of the regret he had? Was it because he really did want to be there for Rangiku, for the baby? Or was he just a coward? It was probably all of those things and more. He didn't want to die, he just didn't want to die.

"Still scared?" asked Rangiku.

"Petrified," he replied, "Why is it, Rangiku, that ya never scared of dy'n?"

"I can think of a ton of things that can make living unbearable," she replied.

"Like?"

"Living without you," she whispered, "Living without ever seeing your smile, never being able to see your beautiful blue eyes, never being able to feel your silky silver hair..." tears welled up in her eyes, "If I didn't have this baby inside me, I would have tried again Gin," the arm around her tightened, "I can think of other things that would make life unbearable and where death would be an escape. I was hoping for death the day you found me Gin. My life had been so lonely and so miserable before, when I collapse I was glad the end was near. I remember seeing the blue, blue sky and thinking, it's not a bad day to die. Not a bad day at all."

"Ya couldn't have been that resigned ta death," commented Gin, "Ya accepted my food."

"Because you were smiling, because you were more beautiful then the sky and because you were offering me food. No one had ever done that to me before. I cannot recall a single act of kindness from another soul before you came along. And just by coming along you made my life better. Less miserable. Even if you had walked away afterwards, you had succeeded in giving me hope. Hope that the world was not so bleak."

"I ain't beautiful Rangiku," replied Gin, "And I ain't all that kind. I saved ya cause you were beautiful. I knew ya had no one, cause if ya did ya wouldn't be ly'n there starv'n. I knew if I saved ya, ya would stay with me and I wouldn't be lonely no more. I was just think'n of myself. I always jus' think of myself."

"I know that," said Rangiku, slowly stroking his hair, "But I don't care. That's just you and I love you all the same."

Gin said nothing, just cuddled more into her. He really didn't want to leave her. He really didn't want to die.

* * *

Captain Unohana doubled checked all the test results. It all seemed correct, "Congratulations Vice-captain Matsumoto, it appears you are having twins."

Rangiku stared blankly at her for a good minute before exclaiming in pure joy, "Twins! That's great! Can you tell if they are girls or boys yet?"

"It would appear that one is a boy and the other is a girl," replied Unohana claimly, "But I warn you that it is too early to tell with surety."

Rangiku wasn't listening, "A boy and a girl! That's great! I hope the boy has silver hair. I would name him Gin. Gin! I have to go tell Gin," with that she rushed out of the room.

Unohana sighed, she was glad Rangiku was happy but she had grave concerns for her health. She was seriously concerned that Rangiku may not be able to carry both the babies to term. However, her mental health was more of a concern then her physical health and that alone made her hold her tongue regarding her fears. _Do you have any comprehension of the hurt you have caused her Ichimaru?_ she found herself thinking, _Do you have any comprehension of the hurt you are going to cause her? There will never be a happy ending for her. Even if both the babies survive, she will never be the same. Never. Do you even care?_ She sighed again. Thoughts like that were not helping. she would do all that she could and have faith in Rangiku for the rest.

* * *

Kira was there when Rangiku came to Ichimaru's cell, "Twins, Captain!" he said excitedly upon hearing the new, "Isn't it great!"

"Yeah, it's great. Now ya can have the boy ya wanted Rangiku and ya can have the girl I always said ya should have," said Gin.

Rangiku laughed, "I am going to name the boy Gin. Hopefully he'll have your hair and then the name can make sense. Nor else it would be kind of weird."

Gin's smile faltered at that, "Don' do that," he said, "Don' name 'im after me. He'll have enough ta deal with without hav'n my name."

"But Gin..." started Rangiku.

"Please," he whispered.

"Captain..."

Rangiku could count on one hand the number of times she had heard him say please. Kira couldn't remember ever hearing his captain say please. "Very well," Rangiku relented, "So what do you want to name them?"

"Name the girl after yerself," said Gin, "I always love yer name."

"And the boy?" asked Rangiku.

Gin opened his mouth but abruptly closed it again and hid behind his smiling mask, "Ya can name 'im Toshiro after captain ten."

"Argh! No," said Rangiku, "We have too may Shiro's running around already. Which reminds me, my break is almost over," she said as she started to rush off, "I'll be back later Gin!"

After she left, "You were going to suggest Souske weren't you, Captain," Kira stated with absolute certainty.

"He was someone important ta me," replied Ichimaru, "Don' get me wrong. I don' wan' my kid tak'n after Cap'n Aizen. I don' wan' my kid screwing up 'is life. But Cap'n Aizen had meant a lot ta me," Gin sighed, "It ain't possible now thou. Name'n 'im after Cap'n Aizen. Rangiku wouldn' do it and even if she did fer my sake, it wouldn' be right."

"No," agreed Kira, "It wouldn't be right."

* * *

**Author's note:** Thanks for reading and reviews are appreciated. 


	15. Chapter 15

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_50 years after the execution_

"Look, here's a picture of Shuhei-chan with mummy and daddy," cried Rangiku as she passed a picture of a smiling Matsumoto sitting between a very drunk Hisagi and a even more drunk Kyoraku, "She was so pretty!"

Shunsui grinned, "Look at this one, it's a picture of all the girls at the beach! Mom really was beautiful."

"What are you doing in here children?" asked Nanao as she entered the room, it was a room in Kyoraku's mansion where all of Matsumoto's things were kept. Her kimono collection, her albums and anything else she had ever owned.

"I was looking for mummy's zanpakuto," said Rangiku, "Shuhei-chan was telling me about it and so I wanted to see it."

"I take it Captain Hisagi didn't tell you that we buried her zanpakuto with her," said Nanao.

Rangiku pouted, "Really?"

"Yes, that is the usual custom when a Shinigami dies," Nanao explained.

"I see," said Rangiku a little sadly, "Well maybe there is a picture in here of it!" She cried and started to look for a picture of her mother with her zanpakuto.

"Hey, Nanao-san," said Shunsui, "Is there a picture of Ichimaru Gin in here?" he asked.

"Why do you want to see a picture of him?" demanded Nanao, a defensive note creeping into her voice against her will.

"Just wondering," said Shunsui with Ichimaru's smile, "Captain Kira mentioned they were friends, remember? So I just thought that their might be a picture of him in one of her albums. I have never seen a picture of him. I have seen pictures of Aizen and Tosen but never Ichimaru. So was just curious," he explained.

"No there are no pictures of Ichimaru in any of those albums," said Nanao, "He didn't like having his picture taken," it wasn't a lie. Ichimaru was notoriously camera shy, but he always posed obediently for Rangiku. Just that Nanao had personally burnt every single photo Rangiku had of Ichimaru Gin, even though she knew how precious they had been to her friend.

* * *

_4 months before the execution_

"Smile Gin," said Rangiku as soon as she entered the cell, next thing Gin saw was a flash as Rangiku snapped a picture.

"What ya do'n, Rangiku?" wondered Gin, blinking slightly as the flash made him see spots.

"Taking pictures of you for our children," she said, "Why don't I have more pictures of you Gin?"

"Ya know the answer ta that," Gin pointed out, "I don' like my picture taken. It's kind a stupid, ya tell me ta smile but I always smile and the flash hurts my eyes."

"What doesn't hurt your eyes?" demanded Rangiku suddenly irritated, "Light hurts it, wind hurts it, water hurts it. You have such sensitive eyes."

"Ya started get'n mood swings," commented Gin, "Ain't it a bit early?"

"I don't know," she replied slightly exasperated, "Please Gin," she pleaded, "Let me take some pictures of you. I am making a scarp book for our children. A scrap book full of pictures of you, little notes you sent me over the years with flowers and gifts. I just... I just..." she couldn't complete her sentence, she didn't know how to put it into words.

Gin, however, understood. He wrapped his arms around her and whispered, "I am sorry Rangiku, ya can take all the picture ya want."

"Thank you," she said, "Will you do something for me Gin? Will you write something for our children? Something I can put in my scrap book?"

"I don' know what I can say," replied Gin.

"Just say whatever you want," said Rangiku, "You don't have to explain anything. You don't have to tell them why you betrayed Seireitei and Soul Society. Just... just write whatever comes to mind."

Gin smiled a true smile, "I guess I'll tell 'em how much I loved their mother."

Rangiku stiffened a bit in his arms, before she looked up into his eyes. Her own shining with tears, "You know that's the closest you have ever come to telling me that you love me."

"Ya needed me ta say it ta know I loved ya?" wondered Gin, a little surprised and perhaps a little hurt.

"No, but it's nice to hear the words," whispered Rangiku.

"Then I'll say it," replied Gin, "I love ya, always have, always will."

* * *

_3 months before the execution_

"What would you have done if we were having the twins before... before everything?" wondered Rangiku, as they sat sharing a meal.

"Yeah know I ain't good with what ifs," replied Ichimaru indifferently.

"Indulge me Gin," begged Rangiku.

Gin sighed, "If we had the twins before Cap'n Aizen revealed his true face, I would've name my boy Souske and Cap'n Aizen would've insisted that at least he join squad five as soon as he could join the Gotei 13."

Rangiku looked horrified, "You would have drawn our children into your treachery?" she demanded.

"I didn' say that, Rangiku," replied Gin calmly, "Cap'n Aizen often asked me if I wanted ta get ya on our side. If ya would join our side. I told 'im ya wouldn'. Ya were too good, too loyal and took ya duty ta Soul Society and Gotei 13 seriously. Cap'n Aizen wasn' in ta corrupt'n good people. Said it took too much work with indifferent results. That's why Izuru and Hinamori were only ever pawns ta be played. Unless the kids were rotten like me, they would've been no good ta Cap'n Aizen."

"Then why would he want them in Squad five if not to work on them and mold them into the subordinates of Aizen-sama?" wondered Rangiku.

"He would've want 'em cause they were my kids Rangiku," whispered Gin.

"I don't understand."

"I don' expect ya too. Ya had ta know Cap'n Aizen. Had ta really know 'em ta understand," replied Gin.

"What was Aizen to you?" asked Rangiku.

"He was my cap'n," said Gin, his smiling mask firmly in place.

"Gin."

He sighed again, "That's what he was Rangiku. He was my cap'n but I loved him like I would a father and an older brother. Don' know if he loved me back like a son and a younger brother. I wished he did though."

"Are you sorry he's dead?" wondered Rangiku.

Gin shook his head, "Nay, I ain't sorry. Some ambitions shouldn't be achieved."

"Where would I be if your side had won?" asked Rangiku.

"Probably where ya are now," replied Gin with a wide smile, "Knocked-up and in a cell. Except the cell would really be the room ya and I shared, and ya wouldn't be fac'n execution."

"You are assuming I would have let you touch me again," countered Rangiku, her anger raising slightly.

"Ya would have," said Gin with certainty, "Ya have always loved me enough ta overlook my bloody hands, I don' think that would hav' changed."

* * *

_2 months before the execution_

"Why are you doing this?" demanded Nanao as she watched Rangiku going over her latest batch of Gin pictures.

"What do you mean, Nanao?" asked Rangiku, "I want my children to know who their father was."

"Do you? Do you really?" asked Nanao, "If I were you I wouldn't tell them about that bastard. I wouldn't. I would burn every picture of him and do my best to hide his identify from them. If they asked I would lie. I would tell them... I would tell them I got drunk and don't remember who knocked me up or something. Anything is better then the truth!"

"But Gin..."

"Is a traitor. Is a sadistic, manipulative, bastard who was nearly the cause of your death!" cried Nanao, "I can't do this," she said as she got to her feet, "I can't sit here and watch you look at pictures of that snake with that look in your eyes. He doesn't deserve your love. He never has!" with that she turned and left.

Rangiku watched her go with a sad look in her eyes. She had expected this and was prepared for it. She didn't blame Nanao, nor did she worry about Nanao loving her children any less just because they were his children as well. But her words did still hurt. She was awaken from her thought by Captain Kuchiki entrance.

"What brings you here Captain Kuchiki?" she asked, starting the complicated motions to get to her heavily pregnant body to it's feet, "If you are looking for Captain Hitsugaya, he is not here at the moment."

"Please remain seated, Vice-captain Matsumoto," said Byakuya, "My business is actually with you."

"With me?"

"Yes, I have been informed by Vice-captain Kusajishi that you do not have a house within Seireitei and in fact plan to live with the babies in the squad ten barracks," said Byakuya.

"Yes, that's correct," replied Matsumoto.

"I cannot allow that," said Captain Kuchiki, "A squad barrack is no place for infants. Therefore, I offer you the use of one my houses in Seireitei. I have one very close to squad 10. It is currently vacant, let me offer it to you indefinitely and rent free."

Rangiku's eyes widened in sheer surprise, "Captain Kuchiki that's beyond generous of you! I can never thank you enough! Especially since I never got the impression you liked me or Gin for that matter."

"On the contrary I find you rather entertaining and I always enjoyed my little chats with Ichimaru. I would have enjoyed them more if his very presence did not frighten Rukia out her wits," replied Byakuya.

"He tried to kill Rukia!" Rangiku pointed out, "And you ended up taking the blunt of Shinsou's attack!"

"Those are reasons that make me look forward to his execution," replied Byakuya, "Not reasons that will allow me to stand idly by and watch his children suffer when I can do something

to elevate their suffering with negligible impact to myself.

Matsumoto smiled, "Thank you, Captain Kuchiki, you are a very good man," her smile broadened as she added, "I am sure you and Yachiru will be very happy together when she is old enough to marry."

Byakuya's face went red as a cherry blossom and he made a swift exit from the room. Rangiku, however, noted that he didn't protest. Rangiku made a mental note to drop a hint to Yachiru to get on with the whole growing up thing.

* * *

**Author's note:** I feel like I should explain why I have Rangiku and Nanao be such close friends in the story. Apart from the fact that they are both members of the Shinigami Women's association and Kyoraku is Rangiku's drinking buddy I went off the Valentine's Day Omake (you can get is at: http:// www . bleachexile . com / multimedia / bleach-omake-manga-downloads /). In it, Rangiku comments about Nanao's chocolate making and seems to imply that they make Valentines chocolate together every year. Rangiku also teases Nanao about making the chocolate for Kyoraku but not having the guts to give it him and for writing something she didn't mean on it. I know it's still making a mountain out of a molehill but when everything is taken into account (they both appear to be close to each other in age, both members of Shinigami women's association, both linked to Captain Kyoraku, both Vice-captains with opposite personalities to their captains etc) to me seemed enough to write them as close friends. Friends who make valentines chocolate together and tease each other about the people they want to give the chocolate to.

Also, EchoLoco reminded me that during Diamond Dust Rebellion Nanao and Kyoraku, along with Renji, were the only people to visit Rangiku when she was placed under house arrest and the only people who went just to see her. Renji was trying to find information from her to help Ichigo. So you know there are other signs that Rangiku, Nanao and Kyoraku are close. Also, there is episode 228 - the Bleach Beach special. There again Rangiku and Nanao were shown to be close because while Rangiku isn't one to conform to social norms, her interaction with Nanao during that episode would be extremely uncomfortable (especially given Nanao personality type) if they weren't good friends. Not to mention that during the new weeks previews Rangiku offers to strip to get the guys to complement them and Nanao is the one that holds her down. Again, proof that she's a person who acts as a foil and wet blanket to Rangiku's outrageous, something mere acquiescence/colleagues just wouldn't do.


	16. Chapter 16

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_50 years after the execution_

"Mom sure liked puzzles," commented Shunsui as he played with one the mechanical puzzles left to him by his mother, "She had so many!"

Nanao didn't comment, she didn't want to lie but she wasn't going to tell them the truth either. "This ones too hard for me!" complained Rangiku.

Kyoraku laughed, "Come here, I'll help you with it."

"Thanks daddy!" cried Rangiku, she climbed onto his lap and they started solving the puzzle together.

"Did you give them the puzzles, daddy?" asked Shunsui, "You are so good with them!"

Kyoraku took a peek at Nanao from the corner of his eyes, she seemed bent upon avoiding Shunsui's question but Kyoraku did not think that was the wisest course of action, "No, they were left to her by Ichimaru Gin," he explained much to the children's surprise, "From what I understand Ichimaru used to get a puzzle every year as a birthday present from Aizen Souske. He left them to her for you during the last weeks of his life. It was important to him and so your mother took them. If only because she didn't want to hurt her old friend."

* * *

_4 weeks before the execution_

He wasn't doing well. He had all but stopped sleeping. When she wasn't there all he did was pace the length of his cell. He wasn't eating much either. Kira had started bringing all his meals and would sit with him as he ate what little he would. Gin didn't see the point of nourishing his body. Why bother, it was going to be destroyed. He would have stopped eating all together if he didn't feel the need to hang on for Rangiku. She worried about him, she worried about him a lot, "Please Gin," she said as they lay intertwined on his bed, his hand resting on her bulging belly, "Please hold on."

"Fer what, Rangiku?" wondered Gin, "I ain't particularly interested in see'n the true form of the Sokyokus, though I hear it's very pretty."

"Don't you want to see our children?" wondered Rangiku.

"Ya think Cap'n Commander-san will let me live long enough ta see the babies?" he wondered.

"The Captain-commander is not cruel," whispered Rangiku, "Captain Unohana said the babies will be here very soon."

"That's good," said Gin, "I wouldn't want ya ta be lonely even one day after I go," Rangiku said nothing just tightened her grip on his torso. After a moment Gin continued, "Ain't it ironic Rangiku, how unselfish impending death makes ya. Cause I have noth'n ta look forward ta I keep think'n about ya and Izuru. I don' think I ever spent half as much time think'n about other's as I have been now. This death sentence sure made a better man outta me," he said with a mocking smile against Rangiku's breast that Rangiku felt with her entire body.

"What did you do to Kira?" Rangiku wondered.

"Why?" wondered Gin, "What has he been do'n?"

"He looks more miserable then he did when you first left. He looks like he's about to break," she told him, "What did you do?"

"Noth'n," said Gin with a sigh, "He did it ta himself. He went digg'n in ta my past and fer reasons I don' understand he likes me even more then he did before. Never knew my cute little Izuru was such a masochist," he said, smiling again, "He could've just gone on hat'n me as the traitor I am but he didn'. He tried ta... I don' even understand what he tried ta do. Now he comes ta me everyday but can' even bring himself ta look at me and every time he does, he looks like he wants ta cry. Why do that ta yourself, I ask ya."

"He never hated you Gin," said Rangiku, "Not even when you first left. He was upset, he felt guilty for the part he played in aiding you. He also felt guilty and inadequate that he was not able to detect your treachery. But he never hated you."

"He should've," said Gin, "So should ya. I would hurt ya less if ya hated me."

"Perhaps we are both masochists for loving a sadist like you," replied Rangiku, "But you know Gin, I would rather have the love and the pain then no love and no pain."

* * *

_3 weeks before the execution_

"How is Captain Six's house work'n out?" Gin asked.

"It's great! It's so close to squad ten barracks, I might as well be living in the barracks. But it's so big each of the kids are going to have a room of their own. Then there is the garden! It has such a beautiful garden. I am going to ask Captain Kuchiki's permission to plant persimmon trees in the garden. I am going to make sure our kids grow up liking hoshigaki. I..." she stopped and started tearing-up, she had been doing that a lot of late, "I wish you were there, Gin. I wake-up in the middle of the night feeling the babies kick and I find myself feeling for you next to me. I want share those little moments with you but your not there," she sobbed, "You'll never be there."

"I am sorry Rangiku," whispered Gin, "I really am."

* * *

_2 weeks before the execution_

"Rangiku my puzzles," he said holding up one of the mechanical puzzles Aizen gave him, "Would ya take 'em for the kids?" he asked, a little hesitantly, "They were from Cap'n Aizen. Only things he ever gave me. I would like ta leave 'em for the kids."

Rangiku hesitated for a moment but then, "Well it's not like Aizen left a spell on them or anything. I doubt they can corrupt my kids through osmosis."

Gin smiled a real smile, "Thanks," he said, just as the doors open and Captain-commander Yamamoto walked in followed by Captain Komamura, Captain Kyoraku and Kira Izuru, "I take it, it's time ya moved me ta the Shrine of Penitence."

"Yes, there is now exactly fourteen days left till your date of execution. Say your goodbyes Ichimaru, Matsumoto, for the two of you will not meet again till Ichimaru is brought to the Sokyoku Hill," boomed the voice the Captain-commander.

Rangiku felt every word with every fiber of her being. She swayed on her feet as her legs gave out from under her, but before she could fall he caught her, "Don' do that, Rangiku," he whispered into her ears, "Ya have ta be strong, dy'n is so much more scary when ya worry about the people ya love. So don' make me worry Rangiku and don' worry. Ya'll be ok. It'll all be ok."

"Liar," whispered Rangiku, as the tears ran down her cheeks unchecked. Gin kissed them and placed a soft chaste kiss on her lips. Both knowing it was most likely their last and suddenly both wondered why they hadn't kissed more often.

"Izuru," Gin called after they parted, "Do me one last favor and take Rangiku back home."

"Of course Captain," whispered Kira as he hurriedly moved to Rangiku's side and pulled her unresisting form against him.

"Ya should really stop call'n me that," said Gin putting his smiling mask back on, "Ya wouldn' want people ta get the wrong idea."

Kira opened is mouth to say something but before he could, Captain-commander Yamamoto interjected, "It is time, we are leaving."

* * *

**Author's notes: **Thanks for reading. Hope you guys are still enjoying the story. Also, EchoLoco reminded me that during Diamond Dust Rebellion Nanao and Kyoraku, along with Renji, were one of the few people to visit Rangiku when she was placed under house arrest and the only people who went just to see her. Renji was trying to find information from her to help Ichigo. I totally forgot about it because I don't like any of the movies and I cannot stand the sealed sword frenzy OVA. If you have never seen the sealed sword frenzy OVA then please don't! It has the power to stop you from liking Bleach.


	17. Chapter 17

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_2 weeks before the execution_

They had never liked each other, indeed Tosen Kaname bore something close to hatred in his heart for Ichimaru Gin. Making them share a cell for the last two weeks of their life, was tantamount to torture, at least for Tosen. He was handling impending execution worse then Ichimaru was, he paced aimlessly about muttering to himself endlessly about his creed and belief in justice, repeating over and over, "I was right, it was the path of justice. I was right."

Much to his amusement, Ichimaru found that Tosen's suffering appealed to one of his basic traits, his sadism. Ichimaru was finding his change of locations much more entertaining then he would have thought previously. He just sat leaning against a wall, wearing his smile watching Tosen still trying to justify his actions to himself, to Ichimaru and to the world at large. Ichimaru could careless and knowing that Ichimaru could careless made Tosen unbelievably angry, "What hell is wrong with you!!!" he screamed, "Don't you care?" he wondered.

"Care about what, Tosen-san?" wondered Ichimaru, managing a truly perplexed look.

"About how unjust our execution is!" cried Tosen, "We didn't do anything wrong! We shouldn't be here."

"If ya say so, Tosen-san," said Ichimaru, then tilting his head towards the one window, "What a nice day it is. I wonder what Rangiku and Izuru are do'n. I haven't been able to sense a thing properly since they brought me 'ere. What a pity. I liked keep'n tabs on 'em."

Tosen let out a frustrated roar and aimed a punch at Ichimaru's face. Ichimaru caught it effortlessly, his smile not faltering, "Ya shouldn' get so worked-up, Tosen-san. I mean, I'm the one leav'n behind a wife and kids. What ya leav'n behind? Noth'n. So why ya so worked-up?"

"Wife?" wondered Tosen as he pulled back his arm, "When did you marry that girl?"

"Didn' ya hear the rumors?" wondered Ichimaru, "I'm suppose ta have married Rangiku in secret shortly after becoming a cap'n. We kept it a secret cause I didn' want ta cause 'er trouble. Being, ya know, not liked by most people."

"So those outlandish rumors were true!" exclaimed Tosen.

"I wonder," was Ichimaru's non-committal reply.

"Ichimaru!" screamed Tosen, feeling the desire to aim another punch at the infuriating man. Ichimaru just kept smiling, with only fed Tosen's rage, "You are a despicable man, Ichimaru Gin. You always were!" Ichimaru didn't reply, just kept smiling till Tosen turned away and resumed his pacing.

_Yer too easy, Kaname_, Ichimaru thought to himself, _But yer still fun ta poke. If I could just keep see'n Rangiku and Izuru too, I wouldn' 'ave minded the move. I wouldn' 'ave mind the move one bit._

* * *

_1 week before the execution_

"Ken-chan! Let's go visit Ran-chan," said Yachiru, "You haven't been to see her once."

"I have!" protested Kenpachi, "I went with Kyoraku just the other day."

"You did!" exclaimed Yachiru, "Why didn't you take me with you?" she wondered with a pout.

"You were off playing with the other girls," said Kenpachi, "Since Nanao was with you, Kyoraku came over for a drink. Just us sitting and drinking isn't all that fun, so we decided to go and drink with Matsumoto."

"You didn't let her drink did you?" demanded Yachiru, "She's not suppose to, it's bad for the babies. Re-chan said so."

"Of course not! I am not stupid and being eaten by Minazuki isn't the way I want to go," replied Kenpachi, "But she could have done with a drink by the look of her."

"That's why we should go visit!" said Yachiru, "Let's go! Let's go!"

"Fine, fine, not like I have anything better to do," replied Kenpachi.

The house Kuchiki Byakuya had lent Matsumoto was truly beautiful. It was a good size and very comfortable in design, boasting a large garden full of cherry trees, various fruit trees and some new saplings of persimmon. They had been planted by Hisagi and Kira under the watchful gaze of Rangiku, she couldn't wait for them to bear their first fruits but knew the fruits would be bittersweet because Gin wouldn't be there to share them with her. It was then no surprise that when Yachiru and Kenpachi got there they found her lying under one of the freshly planted persimmon trees.

Thinking she was sleeping Yachiru dropped from Kenpachi's shoulder and rushed forward to wake her; but when she got there, she screamed, "Ken-chan! Ran-chan is bleeding!"

* * *

They rushed her to the Sougou Kyuugo Tsumesho, Kenpachi could be very fast when he wanted to be. Once there she was immediately rushed into surgery. Not being very good at waiting and needing something to do, Yachiru immediately rushed to Nanao to tell her what had happened and then to Hitsugaya. With the two of them rushing to Ran-chan, Yachiru just had one thing to do. She would probably get in trouble if the Captain-commander caught her at it, but she was sure that Foxy would be worried and it wasn't nice to worry a man about to die. So she headed for the Shrine of Penitence to put her considerable talents at infiltration to work, but half-way there she was intercepted by Kuchiki Byakuya.

"I was wondering how long it would take you to get here," said Byakuya, "You shunpo is becoming sluggish."

"Well if you played tag with me more often," suggested Yachiru, "then I would get loads of practice!"

Byakuya didn't respond to her comment, instead addressed the issue that had gotten him to intercept her, "You were about to do something foolish."

"Foxy..."

"Doesn't need to know," replied Byakuya.

"How did you find out so soon?" wondered Yachiru.

"Renji was at the Sougou Kyuugo Tsumesho," said Byakuya, "About the time you were in squad ten, no doubt telling Captain Hitsugaya what had happened, Renji was in my office giving me the same news. Then when I sensed your reitsu moving towards the Shrine of Penitence I immediately deduced that you were planning on breaking into the shrine to tell Ichimaru Gin that Matsumoto Rangiku was in surgery and may well die, along with her children."

"Don't say that!" screamed Yachiru, "Ran-chan will be fine! The babies will be fine."

"If you believed that you wouldn't be rushing to bring the news to Ichimaru and risking your position, not to mention your very life in doing so," said Byakuya simply.

"But..."

"No buts," said Byakuya firmly, "There is nothing he can do. He can't rush to her side, he can't help her in anyway shape or form. He doesn't need to know. But if you break into the Shrine of Penitence then not only will you be exposing yourself to danger, you would also give them the opportunity to escape using the path you used to get in."

"Foxy wouldn't do that," said Yachiru with certainty, "At least, he wouldn't run. He would go to her. I know he would."

"Perhaps, but Tosen Kaname would run," Byakuya informed her, "Do you really want to plunge the Seireitei into a state of emergency at a time like this? Do you really want to pull the captains and vice-captains who are Matsumoto Rangiku's friends from her bedside to hunt down a coward like Tosen, who doesn't even have the guts to face with dignity the consequences of his choices?" he demanded.

"No," she said with a small voice, as tears welled up in her eyes, "I don't want Ran-chan to die. I don't want the babies to die. I don't want any more bad things to happen. The Gotei 13 is like my family. I don't want to see it crumble anymore."

"Let us hope she won't die or her babies," said Byakuya as he offered her his hand, "Let us return to her and do the only thing we can do now. Have faith in her."

* * *

When Unohana and Isane walked into the waiting area carrying Matsumoto's babies, more then one person in the assembled tableau found their hearts constrict. Not that they all had the same reasons. Kira felt a short sharp jab in his heart as he spied the little tuft of silver hair on the head of the sleeping boy in Unohana's arms, the boy had something resembling a smile on his face. Kira found himself wondering if that's how is captain looked when he was an infant. Almost everybody else, however, was caught in the spell of the girl in Isane's arm.

"Rangiku," whispered Hisagi, not quite believing how much the mother, the daughter resembled.

Isane smile, "Yes, that's her name," she whispered, careful not the wake the babies, "Matsumoto-san said that's what she wanted her named."

"What about the boy?" asked Kira.

Isane shook her head, "She hadn't decided yet."

"How is she?" asked Nanao as she took little Rangiku from Isane.

"She still hasn't regained consciousness," Unohana informed them, "I will not offer you false comfort, it is not looking good."

"Are you saying..." Hitsugaya could not complete the sentence. Unohana nodded. Hitsugaya collapsed on the nearest chair, holding his head feeling utterly helpless.

Kira reached for the baby boy, Unohana gently transfered the baby into his arm, "Careful now," she whispered, "Hold him like this," she said as she showed him the correct way to hold the infant. The baby made a small noise before making itself comfortable in Kira's arms.

They all stood in silence, watching Nanao and Kira cradle the newborns, "Can I take them to see the Captain?" asked Kira meekly.

"No!" said Nanao with sudden vehemence, it seemed to upset little Rangiku and she quickly brought herself under control and gently started to rock her, "I mean, they shouldn't be taken from Rangiku's side. When she wakes-up, and she will, she'll want to see them."

"Nanao-chan is right," said Kyoraku, "We shouldn't take the babies anywhere right now."

"But we should tell Foxy they have been born," said Yachiru, "He should know."

"I will make the arrangements with Yama-jii," replied Kyoraku, "In fact I'll go now."

"If it is alright with you, Captain, I would like to stay here and look after the babies," said Nanao.

"Of course, Nanao-chan," said Kyoraku, "I'll come back here as soon as I am done with Yama-jii and have spoken with Ichimaru."

"I'll stay too," said Kira.

There was a moment of silence during which Nanao shot Yachiru and Isane a look. There seemed to be an understanding between the three because the next moment Yachiru jumped up and all but snatched the boy from Kira's arm, "It's ok Izurun!" she said, as she deftly landing holding baby the way Unohana recommended he be held, "We'll take care of them. You should get some sleep. You look tired," with that she followed Isane and Nanao into Rangiku's room.

"What... what just happened?" wondered Kira, feeling more then a little bewildered.

Unohana gave him a sympathetic look, "Ise-kun has already started putting into action her contingency plan," she replied before following the other's back into the room.

"What does that mean?" demanded Kira of no one in particular.

Hisagi sighed, "What will you do, Kira, if Rangiku-san... doesn't make it?" he wondered.

Kira shot Hisagi a confused look before comprehension hit him, "How would I go about applying for guardianship of the Captain's babies?" he asked.

Hisagi didn't answer his question, instead he replied, "Nanao knows that's what you will try to do. She is moving to shut you out Kira and I doubt you are going to win against her."

"But she can't have them!" cried Kira, "There my captain's children! And she hates him! No, she loathes him! She can't... they can't let her have them. Hisagi-san, help me. Please!"

Hisagi regarded him for a moment, before sighing and saying, "Because we are friends, I'll tell you this much," he said, "Go talk to Captain Komamura. He and his squad has been helping the Captain-commander with the daily business of Seireitei ever since the demise of Room 46. He'll know the proper protocols and can tell you how things will be decided should the worst happen."

"Thank you, Hisagi-san," said Kira and made to leave.

"But," Hisagi added, to Kira's back, "That's the last bit of help you will receive from me on this matter. Between you and Nanao-san, I'll support Nanao-san if only because she will ensure Ichimaru's taint doesn't touch those kids."

Grateful to Hisagi for suggesting Captain Komamura Kira made no reply, unwilling to put into words the bitterness he felt towards all and sundry at that moment. After Kira left, Hisagi decided to go for a walk in the Sougou Kyuugo Tsumesho garden. He really needed some fresh air. Hitsugaya remained where he was seated, trying to process all that he had heard. After a few moments thought, he stood up. His eyes shining with resolve, he headed towards Rangiku's room. He was going to pray that Matsumoto pulled through, but just in case she didn't, he was going let Ise Nanao know that he was willing to do whatever she asked of him to keep his Vice-captain's children out of the hand of that snake's over loyal second.

* * *

For once it was Ichimaru who was disturbed. He had spent the entire day at the cells only window, that looked out to the Sokyoku Hill, trying to strain his senses. "What's the matter, Ichiamru?" wondered Tosen.

"Nothing," replied Ichimaru, "Just thought I sensed something off with Rangiku."

"Still worrying about that girl," commented Tosen.

"No point worry'n about myself," Ichimaru shot back. Tosen wisely decided to ignore him.

Sometime after, the door to their cell opened. Revealing Kyoraku and Ukitake, "Two captains," commented Tosen, "Did you think we would rush you, Kyoraku?"

Kyoraku smiled and didn't answer, instead turned his attention to Ichimaru. Who was looking at him expectantly. His eyes open. Kyoraku was startled by their vivid blue colour. He always imagined that Ichimaru hid his eyes because they were coloured something strange like red or yellow, "Matsumoto Rangiku," he began, "Has given birth to two healthy babies. One boy and one girl."

Despite his worry Ichimaru found himself smiling, really smiling, "That's great!" he said, "Rangiku must be happy."

Kyoraku turned away. This was the reason why he had asked Ukitake to come with him. Kyoraku was not good with delivering bad news. Ichimaru must have realised that something was wrong because his smile faltered and he shot the two men a confused, fearful look. "Matsumoto Rangiku is... well she isn't doing too well," said Ukitake, "Zaraki Kenpachi found her unconcious and bleeding. She was rushed to the Sougou Kyuugo Tsumesho and went immediately into emergency surgery, during which the babies were delivered. She is still unconscious but we are hopeful that she will awaken soon."

"Oh," was all Ichimaru said before a long pause. When he broke it, he was smiling again. Only this time it was just his mask, "Well, thanks fer tak'n the trouble ta come see me. I'll be hop'n ta see Rangiku back on 'er feet fer the big day."

Ukitake shot him a sad but resigned look, "I really wish you hadn't done what you have done, Ichimaru and you too Tosen. I really take no pleasure in the impending execution of brother officers."

Tosen opened his mouth, undoubtedly to launch into a tirade about justice and how he was right. But Ichimaru, who really didn't want to repay the kindness of Ukitake and Kyoraku by subjecting them to Tosen Kaname, cut him off, "Yer kind, an' right about now I wish I hadn' done it either. But it's too late for regrets ain't it."

"Yes," agreed Ukitake, "Yes it is."

* * *

**Author's note:** Sigh, why do my chapters come out so long. Anyway the Kenpachi, Kyoraku being friendly and drinking together came from a Shinigami Golden bit at the end of one of the bount episodes, I can't remember which one. Thanks for reading and all the reviews. I hope you are still enjoying the story because at this stage it looks like the story will go to at least 21 chapters and it's looking very likely to go to 22. I mean, I am not sure if people will find the whole, how Nanao and Kyoraku managed to shut Kira out of the kids lives interesting but I thought I would explore it a little. Hope people don't find it too boring. Oh, yes the whole strange eye colour thing was a dig at Ichimaru's eyes being shown as red in the anime and yellow of all colours in the video games.


	18. Chapter 18

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_6 days before the execution_

Exactly at midnight she opened her eyes and the first thing she saw was Nanao sleeping in an easy chair near her bed, her son resting in the crock of her arm. "Nanao," Rangiku whispered, her voice weak.

Nanao immediately came awake, "Rangiku! Your awake! Thank kami-sama," she cried. At her sudden excitement the baby boy abruptly woke-up and started crying, "O no," whispered Nanao as she started rocking him. Rangiku weakly reached for him, Nanao turned the baby over, helping her hold him close. The boy immediately quieten, "He knows his mother," exclaimed Nanao.

Rangiku smile softly, "He thinks my breast are pillows!" she whispered, noticing how the baby was resting it's head against her ample bosoms, "Just like his father. Gin always said my breast made me ten time as fun to cuddle with. Although I don't know who he was comparing me to. I mean, I don't think he ever cuddled up to anyone else."

Nanao opened her mouth to make a bitter retort suggesting that Gin might well have been cuddling up to Aizen! But she stopped herself. Rangiku didn't need bitterness right now. Instead she asked, "What are you going to name him?"

"I don't know," replied Rangiku, "I can't think," the still unnamed boy made a small noise before cuddling against the warmth and softness of his mother and drifting off to sleep, "Where's is my girl?" Rangiku suddenly wondered, "Is she alright?"

"Yes, she's fine," Nanao assured her, "Isane put her to sleep in the cot in the next room. I'll go get her for you. Just stay calm and stay awake. Please Rangiku, just stay awake."

As Nanao hurried away to get her daughter Rangiku found herself gazing sadly at her son, "You look like him," she told the boy, "The same silver hair, the same expression when your eyes and closed. You even have his smirk. I wanted to name you Gin after him but he wouldn't let me. He wasn't serious about Toshiro and he thinks I couldn't guess he wanted to name you Souske. But as much as I love him I am not naming you after Aizen. Never, ever, ever. I don't know what our life would be like today if he had never meant Aizen but it had to be better then what it is now. It had to be."

About then Nanao walked in with little Rangiku, "Here she is!" said Nanao, "Now let's see if we can't get you to hold both of them at once," with Nanao's help Rangiku had a baby against each of her breasts.

"Well done, Rangiku-kun," said Captain Unohana as she walked in, "I am glad to see you awake. I need to look you over before I can leave you alone with the babies," turning to Nanao she added, "Captain Soi Fon is outside waiting for you."

"Thank you, Captain Unohana," said Nanao, "I'll be back later Rangiku."

"You look terrible," commented Soi Fon. Nanao just glared, "Go get some sleep," suggested Soi Fon in her blunt manner, "I'll take over here."

"Are you sure?" asked Nanao.

"What kind of stupid question is that," demanded Soi Fon, "I wouldn't be saying it, if I wasn't. We worked out a rotation. Nemu will arrive in a few hours to take over after Kurotsuchi goes to sleep. Kiyone will be here at dawn to take over from her. Yachiru is up after her. By then it'll be working hours and of course both Isane and Captain Unohana will be around. So nothing to worry about."

"Still," said Nanao, "I'll try to be here as early as I can in the morning. If I can't I'll ask Hinamori if she isn't too busy."

"Don't," warned Soi Fon, "You might have been too tired to notice her reaction when she, Kiyone and I came over to see the babies. But I wasn't. That look she shot them... especially the boy," Soi Fon shuddered, which was enough to send a shiver down Nanao's spine. It took a lot to make Soi Fon shudder, "But you too couldn't have failed to notice that she didn't touch them. I wouldn't trust her anywhere near the babies."

"I'll trust your judgment," said Nanao, before leaving to catch some much needed sleep as Soi Fon entered Rangiku's room to keep her company.

* * *

"Thank you for agreeing to see me, Captain Komamura," said Kira with a deep kneeling bow.

"Think nothing of it, Kira Izuru," replied Komamura, "Now Tetsuzaemon," he said nodding towards Vice-captain Iba Tetsuzaemon, who knelt beside Kira, "tells me that you wish to speak to me regarding the procedure by which you can become the guardian of the children of Matsumoto Rangiku and Ichimaru Gin."

"Yes captain," replied Kira, "I know nothing of such matters and while I pray that Matsumoto-san will pull through, even though she is now awake, Captain Unohana is not hopeful."

"Hmm... the rules are quite simple," replied Komamura, "When a shinigami leaves behind orphan children too young to be considered self-sufficient, they are usually taken to the Seireitei orphanage. Unless said shinigami has family or friends willing to take the children in," he explained, "Where there is more than one person vying for the children, the matter would ordinarily be put forward for judgment by one of the judges of Room 46. With them yet to be replaced, the judgment would fall to Genryūsai-dono. I imagine he would use the same criteria to make his judgment as Room 46."

"If you please captain, what are the criteria?" wondered Kira.

"Means and character," replied Komamura, "In terms of means I think you have the upper hand. You are a Seireitei noble after all."

"Yes but my family was only ever minor nobility," replied Kira, "My parents died when I was very young. Indeed I was still a child but just old enough to look after myself. They left me our ancestral home, which is near the Shinigami Academy, and a little bit of money. None of it is left but I do have some savings of my own. However, in terms of influence I have very little. I am the highest ranking member of my clan."

"Hmm... so you don't know," said Komamura cryptically before sinking into deep thought, "I suppose there is no harm in telling you. According to the Will of Ichimaru Gin, should something happen to Matsumoto Rangiku before his death, you are to receive all his assets."

"What!" cried Kira in utter surprise, "When... when did the captain do this?"

"The Will is several years old," said Komamura, "Ichimaru opted not to alter it when he was given the chance to do so by Genryusai-dono, about a month prior to his removal to the Shrine of Penitence."

"But... but that's not right," cried Kira, "I thought that his assets would be seized by Soul Society because of his treachery. But if they are not, then his children should get everything. Not me!"

"Assets of traitors are not automatically seized," explained Komamura, "It is true the Room 46 was notorious for doing so but Genryusai-dono saw no reason to do so with Ichimaru Gin. Although Tosen's assets will be seized and given over to Squad 9 but that is only because he has stated he does not care what happens to his material possessions. So Genryusai-dono in his wisdom decided that Tosen's fortune, such as they are, was best used for the benefit of the squad he lead for so long."

Kira close his eyes confused and bewildered, "But why wouldn't Captain change his will? He knew he was about to have babies."

"If I may offer a guess," said Komamura, "I think that Ichimaru did not alter his Will because there was nothing to alter. If he died before Matsumoto then Matsumoto would have gotten everything and disposed of it how she saw fit. However, on the off-chance that something happen to Matsumoto before he died then either the babies would have perished with her and if they did not... well I think Ichimaru expected you to behave just as you are behaving. He knew you would look after his children and he has given you the means to do it," continued Komamura, "Because with the addition of Ichimaru's wealth, you trump Ise Nanao completely in the means test. For it does not matter that your clan is not very influential. What matter, is that you are a noble with property within the bounds of the Seireitei. She is not. What remains is the test of character."

"How do I prove my character?" asked Kira.

"That is a very subjective test and Genryusai-dono will find his own means of ascertaining your character and those of Ise Nanao," replied Komamura, "But if you can get a personal recommendations from at least six captains, that would hold great sway with Genryusai-dono."

Before Kira could reply, Iba interjected, "If that's the case, Captain, then Ise Nanao has good as won that one. She'll easily get a recommendation from Captains Kyoraku and Ukitake. Yachiru is no doubt on her side, so she effectively has Captain Zaraki's recommendation as well as Captain Kuchiki's. Captain Kuchiki would probably give her a recommendation just to stop Yachiru from bother 'im. Captain Soi Fon is a member of the Shinigami Women's association and unless she knows something we don't, she'll give her recommendation to Ise. That's five right there and then it's a matter of getting either Nemu to convince Captain Kurotsuchi into giving her one or Captain Unohana or Hitsugaya siding with Ise. No offense, Kira, but I can't see any of them siding with you."

"I know everybody is against me," said Kira, sounding sad and desperate, "But my captain put his trust in me. I have to do what I can."

"Fortunately for you, the only captain you need on your side is Genryusai-dono," replied Komamura, "He is a kind and fair man, who will do what is best for all concerned. More importantly perhaps, he does not have anyone from the Women's association yielding undue influence on him."

* * *

"Is she still alive, Ichimaru?" wondered Tosen indifferently as Ichimaru sat near the window looking out.

"Yeah, she alive," replied Ichimaru, "My Rangiku is tough, ya know."

"Actually no," countered Tosen, "I always thought she was rather pathetic and weak."

"Well I suppose ya would know," replied Ichimaru. Tosen growled but Ichimaru laughed, "Such a scary face, Tosen-san. Yeah should stop mak'n 'em. Ya have so little time ta live. Ya should really make some better faces before ya die."

"Shut-up!" screamed Tosen, "Just shut-up. You know how I know the world is full of injustice, Ichimaru. I know the world is full of injustice because I am to die a day before you! I am to be denied if a day's peace before my death! Peace and freedom from you!"

Ichimaru laughed, "Th'n about justice," he said, "that ya never seem ta get, is that one man's injustice is another man's justice. I can' think of anyth'n more jus' then ya dy'n before me. I mean, I did have ta put up with yer justice crap fer more then a hundred years. It's a miracle that I didn' kill myself."

"The resemble between you and Zaraki Kenpachi is uncanny," stated Tosen.

"Thank ya," replied Ichimaru with a wide grin.

"That's wasn't a compliment!" shouted Tosen.

"I know ya don' think it was," said Ichimaru, "That's wha' makes it a perfect compliment."

"You are a bastard, Ichimaru," stated Tosen, "I take back what I said before. Your death is well deserved and is justice!"

"If ya say so, Tosen-san," said the grinning Gin, before he turned back to the window and concentrated on picking-up Rangiku's reitsu.

* * *

**Author's note:** Damn it! This story just keeps getting bigger and bigger! I had to expand my planned chapters out to 23. Why am doing so much Tosen! *sigh* Anyway, the last chapter is written but before I can post that I have to kill rangiku, kill tosen, settling the battle for their kids, do rangiku's funeral and then the big one Ichimaru's execution and then, then I can end the story. *sigh* If I knew this story was going to be so big, I would never have started it! I bet people are getting bored and sick of this story already. Sorry! I'll do my best to not make it get any longer. Thanks for sticking with me this far!


	19. Chapter 19

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_90 years before the execution_

She found her asleep, with empty bottles of sake littered around her, "Rangiku!" cried Nanao in anoyance as she shook her awake, "I know imitation is the sincerest form of flattery but aren't you imitating Captain Kyoraku a little too much!"

"But Nanao, we have to follow our captain's lead!" complained Rangiku, "Besides, what's the point of being in Squad eight if we can't get drunk and sleep a lot."

"Rangiku!" cried an exasperated Nanao, "Besides, you are hardly old enough to be drinking. Even the captain would chastise you if he caught you at it."

Rangiku sighed, "I know, but I have a theory that every sip I take and every hour I sleep, he gets a little closer to missing me."

"Ichimaru! It's all about Ichimaru with you!" cried Nanao, "What has he done now?" she demanded.

"Nothing," said Rangiku, her voice small and sad, "He hasn't been doing anything. That's the problem. He hasn't come to see me once in the last two months. I went to see him the other day but as soon as I found him, he told me to chase him and took off," tears welled-up in her eyes, "But I couldn't keep up with him."

"This is stupid!" cried Nanao, "If he wants to run away, let him run. You can have any boy in Seireitei. Any boy! Why do you keep chasing after Ichimaru Gin! He's no good for you, Rangiku. Look how much pain he causes you. Just leave him and find someone else. Someone nicer, someone who won't play games with you. Someone who will actually love you."

"But I don't want anyone but Gin," whispered Rangiku.

"You fool!" cried Nanao, as she got up to leave, "Even a hundred years form now you'll be waiting for him and shedding tears. In fact, the best thing to hope is that he breaks your heart completely. That's the only way your are going to move on!"

"I know I am pathetic," replied Rangiku, "But I can't help it."

Nanao didn't know how to respond to that, "Maybe you'll grow out of it," she said hopefully, "We are still just kids. Kids are stupid. At least that's what Lisa-san used to say. She used to say, she used to be into a lot of stupid things as a kid. But she grew out of them as she got older and found new things, better things I think. She never specified. Maybe you just need to grow-up a little and you won't be so into Ichimaru anymore."

"I hope that don' happen," said Ichimaru, both Rangiku and Nanao jumped. How did he get to close without either of them realizing? Gin made a beeline for Rangiku and wrapped her in a tight embrace, "I would be very sad, if ya ever stopped wait'n fer me Rangiku," he said as he planted a soft kiss on her head, "Ya shouldn' wish such things, Ise-san."

Nanao felt mildly disgusted as she watched Rangiku all but melt in Gin's arms, "Pathetic," she said as she turned away, "Really pathetic."

* * *

_5 days before the execution_

"Pathetic..." the word echoed in her head as Nanao slowly woke-up. What a dream to have at a time like this. Nanao sighed as she rolled away from the light streaming in through her window. They were very young when that incident had happened. That day Nanao really had hoped and prayed that Rangiku would get over Ichimaru Gin. She hadn't, she stayed with him and let him keep on playing games with her. Let him keep hurting her. She had simply gotten better at hiding things. Ichimaru Gin wore a mask, everybody knew that. But truth was that Matsumoto Rangiku also wore a mask. It was just more subtle and concealed only one thing. Her bleeding, aching heart. That was one of the last times Rangiku had talked so much about what was happening between her and Ichimaru. Perhaps it was Ichimaru who suggested she not share or Rangiku herself realized that her friends would never approve of Ichimaru and would forever be suggesting she walk away, so simply stopped talking so as to avoid hearing the same thing over and over. She had, however, never left him. She had never got over him. She still loved him as much, if not more, as she did all those years ago.

Nanao sighed again, "Why him, Rangiku?" she wondered of the empty air as she got up to get ready, "Why him of all people."

Upon leaving her room she was greeted to a loud and cheerful call of "Nanao-chan! You look so lovely this morning!" cried Captain Kyoraku, "You must have slept really well last night."

"Well enough," answered Nanao indifferently, "I had a very nostalgic dream though."

Kyoraku's smiling facade collapsed, "So did I," he admitted, "I was dreaming about meeting Rangiku for the first time. She was trembling like a leaf in a gale storm as she stood with the new recruits. Terrified of doing wrong, of failing. But I could tell even then she was worrying for nothing. I knew she would make it of Vice-captain at least. Maybe even captain," Kyoraku sighed, "Pity Yama-jii didn't agree to my suggestion of letting me have two Vice-captains! I didn't much like losing Rangiku to squad ten."

"I am not sure how having Rangiku as a second Vice-captain would have helped the squad," said Nanao, "She avoids work as much as you do! I would have ended up doing all the work, even with her here," said Nanao with a sigh.

"But you are so good at it, Nanao-chan!" cried Kyoraku.

Nanao rolled her eyes, "Let's get going," she said, "Hopefully we'll hear some good news when we get to the Sougou Kyuugo Tsumesho," but when they got there, all the news was bad.

* * *

They were all telling her it was going to be alright. They were all telling her she was going to be fine. She knew they were all lying. She was fighting to stay awake, fighting to spend just a few more minutes with her babies. Babies that lay with her on the bed. Her lids grew heavy, she had to fight to keep them open. She could feel her body slowly shutting down. She knew she didn't have long, not long at all.

Looking around the first person she saw was Yachiru, she had tears in her eyes but when she saw Rangiku looking at her she forced herself to smile, "Ran-chan, let's have a big party to celebrate the birth of the babies once you get better," she said in her cheerful, bubbly voice.

Rangiku managed a smile, "You should have the party," she agreed, "I am sorry I won't be able to attend," she managed to say in a small, weak voice.

"Don't say that Ran-chan," cried Yachiru, "Don't say that."

Rangiku smiled again, "I know Captain Zaraki's shoulders are comfortable," she said, "But perhaps it is time to leave it. Bya-kun is waiting, no?" Yachiru couldn't keep her cheerful facade up any longer, she found herself nodding slowly as sobs began to escape her.

Looking past her, Rangiku spied Hisagi Shuhie looking as if the world was about to end. "Shuhie," she whispered and weakly reached for him. He rushed forward and clasped her hand with both of his, "I am sorry," she said.

"For what, Rangiku-san?" he wondered.

"For not being able to return your love," Hisagi shot her a look of shock, he had thought he had hid his feelings well, "Lots of people like me, would love to have drowned in my chest," she said with a teasing smile, "But you were the only one who actually loved me. I am so sorry, I couldn't return it. I am so sorry I had none left to give because Gin took it all," her smile widened slightly, "He was so insanely threatened by you. So jealous of every moment I spent with you. I was always afraid he would do you some harm," she whispered, "I am glad he didn't. I am glad to have had you as a friend. Please forgive me everything else."

"There is nothing to forgive, Rangiku," no, he wasn't going to add the -san. Here at the end, he would just call her Rangiku. He leaned forward gave her a chaste kiss on the lips. It wasn't enough but it meant a lot to him.

Rangiku smile, turning from him she saw Hitsugaya. Looking lost and utterly helpless, "Captain," she said, "Thank you for putting up with me for so long."

Anger shone on Hitsugaya's face as he barked, "Stop this Matsumoto! Just... just get better!"

"I am sorry, Captain," she replied with a sad smile, "This once I can not obey you." Hitsugaya turned away from her, he wanted to cry but the tears were frozen solid.

Kyoraku was the next person she saw, "Captain Kyoraku," she began, "Thank you for all the help you gave me over the years. Not to mention all the sake you bought me. But thanks especially for taking me into your squad when I first joined the Gotei 13. My childhood was that much happier because I got to spend it with squad eight, especially Nanao..." she felt the hands of death crawling at her soul.

"I was glad to have you in my squad, Rangiku," whispered Kyoraku, "And glad to have you as my drinking buddy."

Rangiku smiled, her vision was getting dark, "Nanao..." she called again.

"I am here," said Nanao, her voice breaking with her grief.

"Please forgive him," begged Rangiku, "Please, forgive Gin for everything he's done and please, please love my children like they were your own," it was getting difficult to breath, "And please... ask my children to... forgive... me..." she couldn't hold on anymore. Her eyes closed, her limbs went limp and her spirit body gave out.

"Ran-chan!" screamed Yachiru, as Hisagi fell to his knees sobbing. Hitsugaya left the room, unable to cry, unable to grieve. For the first time in his life, he wished a Menos would attack Seireitei - just so he would have something to hurt, something to kill.

Nanao sobbed uncontrollably, "I can't, I can't. Forgive me Rangiku but I can't forgive him," she said between her sobs, "I can never forgive him the years of pain and misery he inflicted on you. But I do love them. I already love the babies with all my heart and because I love them, I'll do everything in my power to make sure he never, ever manages to hurt them like he has you."

Kyoraku stood where he was, contemplating the two infants. They were beginning to wake-up, perhaps because they sensed something was amiss. The boy was the first to wake and started to make small noises that were mere moments away from turning into ear spitting wails. He moved without thinking, picking him up and beginning to rock him slowly, "Nanao-chan," he whispered, "I think little Rangiku needs you."

Nanao seemed to come back to herself at the words and reached for the baby girl, "Don't cry," she whispered to the infant as she cradled her in her arms, "Everything will be alright. You'll see. I won't fail Rangiku."

A soft sad sigh escaped Unohana that went all but unregistered by the grieving occupants of the room. The fourth division captain quietly left her corner, where she had stood all along, all but forgotten as the goodbyes were said. She had a very unpleasant task ahead of her.

* * *

He felt it when it happened, he just didn't want to believe it. Surely it was just his senses getting confused. It was hard to sense anything within the Shrine. Yes, that was it. She wasn't gone, she couldn't be! She just... the door to the Shrine opened to reveal Captains Unohana Retsu and Zaraki Kenapachi. Gin looked at them, knowing what their presence meant but refusing to acknowledge it.

"Don't try anything," Zaraki warned, pinning Tosen with a deadly glare.

Unohana turned her full attention to Gin, who was kneeling by the lone window, "Vice-captain Matsumoto Rangiku," said Unohana, her voice laced with sadness "Has passed away due to complications related to her pregnancy and child birth."

Gin stared at them. His eyes were open, his smile missing. His face blank and expression less. His mind frozen, his heart in denial. This was not happening. This story was too sad, it was not suppose to be this way. She was suppose to find happiness, in her children, among her friends, in her duty as a vice-captain and a shinigami. She was suppose to live long, long after him. She wasn't suppose to die before him. This was all wrong. This was all wrong and he didn't know how to react. He didn't... Unohana stood before him.

In her measured pace she had covered the distance between them and now stood before him. He looked up, looking more like a lost child then she would have ever thought possible and she had known him as a child. Giving him a look of deep empathy she knelt to be level with him and gently drew his unresisting form against hers and let him rest his head on her shoulder. Perhaps it was the motherly feel that Unohana Retsu generally gave off, or perhaps it was simply the contact of another being who cared, or perhaps it was the fact that Ichimaru Gin had been conditioned to show his emotions best when wrapped in Rangiku's arms and Unohana's arms were a good substitute, whatever the cause Gin found himself weeping into her shoulders.

"I had a question," whispered Unohana, "I questioned whether you truly cared about Matsumoto Rangiku," she explained, "I have my answer. I just wish it was not bought at such a high price." Gin said nothing, just clung to her as he drowned in his tears.

* * *

**Author's note:** Ok I confess, I cried while writing this chapter :( It is not stated anywhere whether Rangiku was always in squad ten. I made it up that she was in squad eight first. Anyway, thanks for reading and thanks for all the reviews!


	20. Chapter 20

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_4 days before the execution_

Unohana had spent over an hour with Ichimaru. During that time he had done nothing but cry. However, by the end of the hour Ichimaru had retreated back behind his smile. Unohana had let him. Since she and Zaraki left, Ichimaru had been sitting quietly by the window looking out on the Sokyoku Hill, his mask firmly in place. Tosen considered saying something comforting but he didn't really feel like comforting Ichimaru. He had never liked the man and always found Matsumoto Rangiku annoying and pathetic. He didn't think her loss was that big in the grand scheme of things. So after awhile Tosen proceeded to ignore Ichimaru and only remembered his presence when Ichimaru said all of a sudden, "Tosen-san, think they would swap our execution date and kill me first?"

Tosen looked at Ichimaru in some surprise, "Since when are you unafraid of death?"

"Since I became afraid of liv'n," replied Ichimaru, as he face was turned away from Tosen, he could only guess at the expression on them, but Tosen suspected that Ichimaru was not smiling as he said that.

* * *

Almost all the Vice-captains of Soul Society were given the day-off by their captains. Matsumoto Rangiku had been popular and everybody felt her loss. Sasakibe was the only one who considered himself not close to Matsumoto and as such, thought it improper to take his captain up on the offer of a day off. Omaeda would have liked to have at least a few hours to himself to think about things, he had always liked Matsumoto despite all her teasing, but Soi Fon wanted to spend the day with the other girls of the women's association and so Omaeda had no choice but to suspend dealing with his grief while his captain dealt with hers. Iba and Renji kept Hisagi company, the latter was piling in the drinks to the point where alcohol poisoning was becoming a concern. Hinamori found herself in a room with a silent Hitsugaya, she couldn't leave him alone but she also couldn't find the words, the gesture to take him out of his inner-world. All she could do was sit with him and hope that her presence brought some comfort, for she was utterly at a loss as to how to reach him.

Yachiru was inconsolable in her grief. She insisted upon staying with the babies but could do nothing but burst into tears at the sight of them, "I don't want Foxy to die," she finally said between sobs, "I don't want them becoming orphans."

"That can't be helped," replied Soi Fon, the entire Shinigami women's association was gathered in Squad Eight with the babies, "He broke the laws of Soul Society, he betrayed the Gotei 13. He has to be put to death."

"Captain Unohana said he broke down when she told him what had happened," Isane told them, "I don't think the captain was expecting that from him."

"It's not that Ichimaru didn't love her," said Nanao, the anger blatant in her voice "It's just he love was like a disease that was spread and consumed Rangiku. In many ways it would have been better had he not loved her at all. She stayed with him because she knew he returned her love. Even if he could never say it out loud. If he didn't love her... she would have left him years and years ago."

Isane sighed, "I wonder if he ever told her he loved her."

Nanao turned away, "He did. About four months ago he finally told her he loved her. She was so ecstatic! It was disgusting. I couldn't believe he would do that to her!"

Nemu looked slightly confused, "I do not understand, should he not have told her he loved her?"

"Not now no," said Nanao, "What good would tell her he loved her have done when he was going to die in four months?" wondered Nanao, "No good! No good at all. All it did was make Rangiku suffer more. Because once the ecstasy from finally hearing those words leave his mouth had worn off... Rangiku turned into a sobbing mess of grief and misery," she explained, her own eyes tearing up, "All his love ever brought Rangiku was grief and suffering. It would have been better if she didn't have it."

Nemu shook her head, "You are determine to hate him and so are misconstruing everything he ever did in relation to Rangiku."

"I am not going to say I am unbiased," replied Nanao, "But she was my best friend and now she's gone."

"But Foxy didn't want that!" protested Yachiru, "You can't blame Foxy! Stop blaming Foxy!"

"But that's what happened," said Nanao, "Would Rangiku have died if she was not under the emotional stress from his impending execution? Did the fact that she had tried to kill herself and was very weak for months have anything to do with her death? If he wasn't on death row, he would be with her and him just being in the same with her made Rangiku... more confident, more happy, more... just more everything."

Kiyone pulled up her knees to her chest and declared, "I am never falling in love. It just hurts way too much."

"No," replied Nanao, "You just have to make sure the person who you give your love to is worthy of receiving it."

* * *

Renji was with Hisagi, Hinamori was with Hitsugaya. No one seemed to remember or care about Kira. Not that he could blame them. Hisagi and Hitsugaya had been utterly devastated by her death, but as he sat alone in the Squad three barracks he could but feel the full weight of his loneliness. He didn't want to be here. He wanted to be with his captain. Even though he knew he had no comfort to offer his captain and that his captain wouldn't have any comfort for him, he just wanted to be near someone else who felt the same loss. It was, after all, how he and Matsumoto Rangiku had gotten close. After his captain had been revealed as a traitor, Kira had spent as much of his free time with her as he could. They never talked much. Rather she didn't talk, but she let him talk about whatever he wanted. Including his captain if he felt so inclined. Mostly they just drank but just being there with her, sitting with her, knowing that she missed his captain as much as he did had made the pain bearable. This time, however, there would be no such comfort. He was alone. Alone to deal with his grief as best he could. Fortunately he had, had practice. It had been the same after his parents had died and left him totally and utterly alone in the world.

Kira sighed and looked down at the paperwork he had just completed. They were papers formally seeking the guardianship of his captain's children. Children he had not even been allowed to see since that brief moment shortly after their birth. He looked them over to make sure they were all correct, "Please," he whispered to himself, "Please let this be successful. I don't want to be alone anymore. I'll take good care of them and love them with all my heart. Please just let me have them. I don't have anyone else."

* * *

"Nanao-chan," said Kyoraku, as she entered his rarely used office, "They are ready," he said handing Nanao some papers, "Would you like to take a look and make sure everything is in order. After all, you are the desk work specialist."

Nanao took the paper wouldn't comment, but as soon as she saw them she gasped, "Captain! Why is your name on the adoption papers?" she demanded.

"I thought that would be obvious, Nanao-chan," said Kyoraku, "I am adopting them,"

"But why!" cried Nanao, "Is it because you think I can't win against Kira Izuru?"

"Well you can't win against Kira Izuru," replied Kyoraku, "He is a Seireitei noble, he has property and if the rumors about Ichimaru's will is correct, he has the wealth to completely trump you on that score. More importantly, Yama-jii knows that the thing that binded Ichimaru, Rangiku-chan and Izuru-kun together was their lonely childhoods. Ichimaru and Rangiku were utterly alone till they found each other. As for Izuru-kun, you probably don't know this but his father used to be a seated officer with in Squad 1. He was loyal and utterly devoted to Yama-jii. Kira Sr died during a mission. Shortly after his wife followed him, leaving Izuru-kun totally and utterly alone. He was still a child when they died but just old enough to be considered self-sufficient. So he was pretty much left to fend for himself. The boy had a tough. Yama-jii kept and eye on him and because he did, he knows how bitterly lonely Izuru-kun was till he joined the Academy. But," Kyoraku sighed, "the reason Izuru-kun was and is to utterly devoted to Ichimaru is because Ichimaru elevated his loneliness in a way neither Abarai-kun or Hinamori-kun could. Izuru-kun is alone again. You are both of good character, but given what Yama-jii knows of Izuru and given how devoted Izuru-kun's father was to squad 1 and Yama-jii, even if you were on equal footing, and you are not because Izuru-kun as more means then you, he would pick Izuru-kun over you and no one would find a fault with his judgment."

"But that shouldn't be the only reason for you to adopt, Captain!" cried Nanao, "Adoption is a big commitment. Are you really willing to take the children into your clan? Give them your name? Be a father to them?"

"Yes, yes and definitely yes," replied Kyoraku, "I always wanted children, Nanao-chan. But I have never liked the idea of settling down with just one woman, unless that woman is my Nanao-chan that is," he said with a suggestive smirk.

"Captain!" cried Nanao.

"I mean what I said, Nanao-chan," replied Kyoraku, becoming serious again, "My heart is already given to those children. I want them as my own. Besides," he added with a smile, "Matsumoto Rangiku was my longest and best relationship!"

"She was your drinking buddy!" cried Nanao.

"Exactly why we had such a long, happy relationship," commented Kyoraku, "She was the personification of my ideal woman. Between her large breasts and her capacity to hold liquor, there was nothing more I could have wanted," he said with a sly smile.

"Captain please!" cried Nanao, "Please be serious."

Kyoraku sighed, "I am serious, at least about adopting the babies. I was her first captain. The only one among her former and current captains who can take care of her children. I cared about her deeply. I want to do this. I want to do this for Rangiku. I want to do this because I do want to be a father to those children. I want this responsibility and I have never wanted responsibility ever in my life before."

Nanao held his gaze, studying him, trying to ascertain his lever of commitment. Finally she smiled and said, "I think you'll make a good father."

"Thanks," replied Kyoraku with a smile.

"But Captain," she started hesitantly, "About the character test..."

Kyoraku laughed, "Don't worry, I have full confidence that Yama-jii's affection for me will make him overlook my tendency to drink to excess and take to bed any woman willing to be bedded. But just to be sure," he said, his eyes shining with resolve, "We need to get as many captains to counter sign the application as we can. I have already got Ukitake's signature."

"Understood," said Nanao, resolving surfacing in her eyes as well, "Captain Soi Fon is here, I'll get her to sign right away. Yachiru should be able to secure Captain Zaraki's signature, as well as that of Captain Kuchiki. If Nemu can manipulate Captain Kurotsuchi when she wants to, I am sure she can get his signature. I'll approach Captain Hitsugaya myself, but that shouldn't be a problem. He does not want the children ending up with Kira Izuru. Which only leaves Captain Unohana and Kumamora and acting captain Hisagi."

"Hmm...I think we should leave Unohana-sempai, Kumamora-kun and Shuhei-kun out of this," came Kyoraku's thoughtful reply, "Shuhei-kun and Izuru-kun are suppose to be friends. It's not good to put friends in awkward positions. As for Unohana-sempai and Kumamora-kun, I suspect both of them would want to remain neutral in this matter."

"You think they will refused to counter sign?" asked Nanao, looking slightly scandalized.

"Well Kumamora-kun might, if only because he has been involved with helping Yama-jii handle Seireitei business since the demise of Central 46. He might feel that it would be a conflict of interest for him to sign on to something like this. As for Unohana-sempai, Izuru-kun was in her squad once. If we ask, she'll sign but she will do so with a heavy heart. Knowing full well the loneliness she'll be condemning Izuru-kun to at least for the forseeable future. I would rather not do that to her."

* * *

**Author's note: **Firstly sorry to anyone who cried over the last chapter, but I must confess that it did make me happy to get those reviews because I got all teary writing the chapter and hoped at least some people would get teary too! I got the stuff I mentioned about Kira in this chapter from this interview with Kubo Tite http:// www . narutobase . net / forums / soul-society-discussion / 21844-kubo-tite-interviews-comments-bleach . html

Of particular note is what he said about Kira Izuru,

_Kira Izuru: All of Seireitei's shinigami are all considered "nobles", but it also has a high, middle, and low class and Izuru is from a low class noble family. He's had a pretty tough time._

I took it to mean that either one or both his parents were shinigami and after their deaths he had a tough time living alone, fending for himself etc. I made up the stuff about his father being in Squad 1 and stuff.

Incidentally, this is what he said about Gin. :-)

_Ichimaru Gin: In my opinion, I was trying to draw him all creepy since his first appearance, but for some reason he is a man who is very popular amongst women. I envy him._


	21. Chapter 21

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_3 days before the execution_

They made a low key arrival, being met at the gate by Ukitake and Rukia only. As they walked back to squad thirteen, where they were suppose to stay for the duration of their visit to Soul Society, Rukia filled them in on all that had happened and all that was going to happen. They listen intently, their hearts growing heavy and sad with every new details. It was no surprise then when Inoue Orihime, vaguely recognizing the area they were in, suddenly said, "I think I'll go see Hitsugaya-kun, Squad ten is near here isn't it?"

"Yes," said Ukitake, "The barracks at the end of this path," pointing to a path to their left.

"Want me to come with you?" offered Ichigo.

"No that's ok," said Orihime, waving her hands in front of her, "I'll meet you all later," with that she took off towards squad ten.

When she arrived she found Hitsugaya sitting on the sofa Matsumoto often slept in. He was alone, Hinamori having been forced to return to her squad to take care of a few things. He was just sitting their staring at the opposite wall. He didn't react when she entered the room or acknowledge her presence when she sat down next to him. He was completely and totally locked inside his own thought and mind. It was not till Orihime silently pulled him towards her and pressed his face to her bosoms that Hitsugaya abruptly became aware of his surroundings. At first Hitsugaya suffered from a moment of delirious happy confusion where he thought that his Vice-captain was alive and back with him, but the next moment the truth of the matter hit him. No, these were not the ample bosoms of his loyal lieutenant, which were the first things he encounter that day, the day he first met her. They day he came rushing to his defense when that shop keeper was rude to him. These were not the breasts of Matsumoto Rangiku, but they were soft, they were warm and they unfroze the tears in his eyes. If only because remembered how she would always offer her chests as a source of comfort, "Just cry all you want on my chest," Matsumoto would say and at that moment Hitsugaya swore he heard Matsumoto's voice say just that.

Slowly he began to sob, "Just cry all you want on my chest," said Orihime, "That's what she said to me once. The first night she and you stayed with me. I cried and cried into her chest till I had no more tears left. I felt better after that. So cry, Hitsugaya-kun, cry and hopefully when all the tears come out, you'll feel a little better," she whispered.

Hinamori watched from the doorway, she had just returned and the sight before her filled her with jealousy, not to mention feeling of deep inadequacy. It wasn't that she thought Hitsugaya and Inoue Orihime had a thing happening. No, it was more that Inoue Orihime, a human girl who had known Hitsugaya barely two years could accomplish what Hinamori had failed to do. She had gotten him to start expression his grief within moments of coming to soul society. _What's wrong with me?_ wondered Hinamori, _Why can't I do anything? What was it that Captain Aizen used to see in me? He saw something in me. I am sure he did._

* * *

About mid-afternoon Zaraki Kenpachi made his way to Sougou Kyuugo Tsumesho and unsurprisingly found Captain Unohana sitting in the garden sipping tea, as she usually did. She on the other hand found his appearance more than a little surprising, "Isn't it about time for your afternoon nap, Kenpachi?" she asked him as he came to sit besides her.

"Can't sleep," he grunted out.

"What's keeping you awake?" wondered Unohana.

"Guilt," replied Kenpachi simply.

"Guilt?" repeated Unohaha in some surprise.

"Yeah," said Kenpachi with a sigh, "Yachiru got me to counter sign the adoption paper's for Ichimaru's babies. Kyoraku's adopting them. Didn't really think about it when I signed it. But as I was trying to sleep I thought to myself, Kira's going to be even more gloom and doom after this. It's making me feel kind of guilty and I feel stupid for feeling guilty. It's not like I don't think Kyoraku won't be good for them."

"I didn't know Captain Kyoraku was going to be the one adopting," said Unohana, "But you are right, he will be good for the babies and the babies will be good for him. It is," she sighed, "Unfortunate the Kira will get hurt over this. But that can't be helped and I wish there was someway Kira could be in their lives. I think he would like that. But..." reluctant to speak ill of anyone, Unohaha didn't complete the sentence.

"Ise Nanao eh?" said Kenpachi, "Yachiru was babbling on about how 'Nana' doesn't like 'Foxy' and is being unfair to 'Foxy' and 'Izurun'. But that isn't exactly stopping her from helping 'Nana'," Unohaha just nodded. After a moment Kenpachi sighed again, "I wish these things were as easy as cutting."

"And I wish it was as easy to heal emotional cuts as it is to heal physical ones," replied Unohaha. She fell into silence but the next moment both she and Kenpachi were distracted as they heard the faint sounds of shunpo not that far from them.

Kenpachi stained his rather limited reitsu sensing skills before saying, "Iba and Abarai, remind me to teach them a lesson about what happens to nosy vice-captains who eavesdrop on captains," he said, his face lighting-up at the prospective of fighting those two. Especially Abarai, who now had bankai. Unohaha smiled and returned to sipping her tea, mentally resigning herself to do some major healing on both Abarai Renji and Iba Tetsuzaemon.

* * *

"Kira!" cried Renji as he threw open to the door to his office, "Grab whatever you have prepared for the adoption of the Matsumoto's kids and come quickly!"

Kira blinked, "What? What happened?"

"We'll explain on the way but we need to go see Captain-commander Yamamoto right away!" said Renji, as Iba nodded frantically behind him.

* * *

By the time Ise Nanao came to squad ten, Hitsugaya tears had stopped and even though his eyes were red he had progressed to the point where he found himself talking about Rangiku with Hinamori and Orihime, "Every time she woke up she would ask what I was doing in her room," he said, "She never seemed to remember that this was the office and the sofa wasn't her bed. I often wonder how she could do that. She didn't have a sofa in her room and her bed is huge."

"Perhaps she dreamt she was in her room," offered Orihime, "I mean, sometimes I dream that I am a robot just before I wake-up and when I do, I wonder where my booster rockets are!"

Hitsugaya smiled at that, Hinamori just looked confused. Nanao cleared her throat, "Forgive me Captain Hitsugaya but I was wondering if I may have a few moments of your time."

"Is it about the adoption?" asked Hitsugaya, suddenly full of eagerness "What do I have to do?"

"You just have to counter sign his form," said Nanao as she presented the application to Hitsugaya, "But you should know Captain, I am not the one adopting the children. Captain Kyoraku is."

Hitsugaya was startled but it was Hinamori who spoke, "Captain Kyoraku? What does he want with that snakes..."

"Hinamori!" chided Hitsugaya, "They are Matsumoto's children and I am glad Kyoraku had decided to adopt them. He'll be a great father to them and you'll make sure they have the mother that they need won't you?" he asked of Nanao.'

Nanao smiled, "Of course and I'll make sure they get to know the mother they should have had too," she assured him, "Besides, they will have you as well and everyone else who was Rangiku's friends," she said as she looked first at Hinamori and then Orihime.

Hinamori found that she didn't much like the idea of spending time with the kids. Orihime on the other hand, said with a bright smile, "I'll cook for them! I mean," she added hesitantly, "Most people don't like what I cook but Rangiku-san used to love it! I am sure her children would too!"

Nanao smiled, "As long as they don't take a liking to powdered green tea we'll be fine."

Hitsugaya signed the papers. "Done," said Hitsugaya, "When are you going to go see the Captain-commander?" he wondered.

"Captain Kyoraku is already there. I'll head over with the paper now," explained Nanao.

"I'll come with you," said Hitsugaya getting up.

Orihime also got up, "Where are the babies? I wanted to see them."

"They are at squad eight," said Nanao, "Captain Soi Fon is watching them. Urahara Kisuke and Shihoin Yoruichi were also there when I left. If you want, you can go now and see the babies with them."

Orihime smiled, "I'll do just that," turning to Hinamori, "Do you want to come to, Hinamori-san?"

"No thank you," said Hinamori, her tone more then a little cold, "I have work to do." Orihime smiled and turned away. Hitsugaya and Nanao where too pre-occupied to take notice of her cold manner, which only served to make Hinamori even more upset.

* * *

"Hisagi-san drank so much that he passed out," explained Renji as they shunpoed to squad one, "But given he had been drinking non-stop since last night, Iba-san and I thought that he must have gone past his bodies limit to handle alcohol and took him to squad four as a precaution. Turns out we were right. If we had delayed even ten minutes Hisagi-san would have died."

"Which earned us an earful from Captain Unohaha," Iba interjected, "She demanded what kind of friends would let a friend do that to themselves."

"Anyway, we stayed with Hisagi-san," said Renji, "About half an hour ago now, we got something to eat and decided to eat in the garden. That's when we over-heard Captain Zaraki and Captain Unohana talking. Captain Zaraki said that Yachiru had gotten him to counter-sign adoption papers for Rangiku-san's babies."

"But we already knew that was going to happen," Kira pointed out, "Why the sudden rush?"

"We thought you were up against Ise Nanao," replied Iba, "You ain't. Captain Kyoraku is the one doing the adopting. Your only hope now is to plead with the Captain-commander and hope like hell he puts more weight on the fact that Captain Kyoraku is a womanizing drunkard and not on the fact that not only is Captain Kyoraku a noble from a wealthy and influential clan ranked just blew the four Great noble houses but also that Captain Kyoraku is like a son to the Captain-commander."

"I got to say, Kira," said Renji, "I can't think of anything you can say or do to convince Captain-commander Yamamoto. But I knew you would hate yourself if you didn't try."

"I have to succeed," stated Kira, sounding desperate, "I just have to!"

However, when they got there, they were met by a pleased looking Hitsugaya outside of Captain-commander Yamamoto's office, "It's to late," he informed Kira, "It's all been decided. Captain-commander had no objects, especially after he saw that the adoption request was counter signed by almost all the captains."

Kira stood there reeling, "Why?" he whispered, "Why not me, Captain Hitsugaya? Why did you support his bid and not mine."

"Because you would have let them... no you would have insisted that they keep his name. Little Rangiku would have been Ichimaru Rangiku. You probably would have named the boy Gin! Ichimaru Gin... that boy is having that disgusting name over my dead body," declared Hitsugaya.

"Matsumoto-san wanted to name him Gin!" cried Kira, "Captain wouldn't let her. I would have... I would have named him what captain wanted."

"And what name did Ichimaru want to give his son?" wondered Hitsugaya, Kira mumbled something, "I didn't catch that."

"Souske," whispered Kira a little loudly then before.

Iba shook his head and Renji shot his dear friend a sad and sorry look. Hitsugaya looked at Kira with utter disgust, "I am not letting that traitor's taint touch those kids," he informed Kira, "He would have killed Hinamori if Matsumoto hadn't arrived in time. That's not something I can ever forgive. More importantly, I owe Matsumoto a lot but especially I owe her the life of one most dear to me. I won't let her children suffer because of him. Don't get in the way Kira," Hitsugaya warned, "Get in the way and I'll kill you myself!"

"Captain Hitsugaya!" cried Renji in protest but Iba stopped him from going further with a hand on his shoulder. Hitsugaya shot them all a reproachful look and turned away to leave.

"Don't escalate this Abarai," said Iba, "Go in and see the captain-commander anyway, Kira. You said you wanted to try even though the decks were stacked against you. So try," he added after Hitsugaya was out of earshot.

* * *

**Author's note:** I was going to add a few more things to this chapter but I think it's long enough as it is. So the next chapter will still be "3 days before the execution". *sigh* which means this story is going to get even longer. *sigh* I am so never writing another GinxRangiku fanfic (which basically mean no more Bleach fanfic) after this. Well at least I won't write another one for a very, very, very long time. But that's for later. First need to finish this! Thanks for reading and for all the reviews.


	22. Chapter 22

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_3 days before the execution_

Kira didn't knock or rather Renji didn't knock but threw open the door and all but pushed Kira in. Stumbling in, Kira barely registering the presence of Captains Kyoraku and Komamura, as well as Ise Nanao, before kowtowed before Captain-commander Yamamoto, "My deepest apology for entering without permission, Captain-commander, but..."

"I know what you are going to say, Kira Izuru," interrupted Yamamoto, "Sajin informed me of your intentions, however, I am sorry to say that against those of Captain Kyoraku Shunsui, your own petition has no grounds."

"But they are my captain's children," cried Kira, "Matsumoto-san was just Captain Kyoraku's drinking buddy. Surely that counts for something!"

Nanao took a deep breath to swallow back the retort, this was not an assembly in which she could speak unless she was addressed first. Yamamoto addressed Kira's point, "You are mistaken," he explained, "Captain Kyoraku used to be Matsumoto Rangiku's captain. Indeed he was her first captain and the captain she spent the longest time serving. She left his service to take up the Vice-captaincy of squad ten. However, as you rightly pointed out, she and Captain Kyoraku remained friends. In addition, her captain at the time of her death, Hitsugaya Toshiro, supports the bid of Captain Kyoraku. Moreover, given that Ichimaru Gin is a captain who not only betrayed the Gotei 13 but cast you aside after using you to do what harm he could to the Gotei 13, I cannot place any weight on your relationship with him."

"But..." insisted Kira.

"But nothing," interrupted Yamamoto, "Your persistence in matter borders on the selfish, Kira Izuru."

"Selfish," whispered Kira, was that how the Captain-commander saw him? Was that how he was behaving? After all, he knew no harm of Captain Kyoraku save that he drank a lot and chased anything in a skirt. What objection did he have to Captain Kyoraku's adoption? Just one, "I don't want those children growing up not knowing about the Captain," he whispered, "Captain isn't... just a traitor. There is more to him and he really loved Matsumoto-san. Their children should know about him. They should..."

Nanao opened her mouth to protest but Kyoraku silenced her with a look as Yamamoto interrupted Kira again, "I understand your feeling but they will not avail you Kira Izuru and have no bearing in terms of the children's adoption. Kyoraku Shunsui, from this day forth will be the children's father. What he chooses to tell or not tell his children is a matter between him and his children. Now if there is nothing else, this business is concluded. My congratulations to you, once again, Shunsui."

"Thank you, Yama-jii," said Kyoraku with a smile, getting up he approached Kira as the later got to his feet, "I am sorry it had come down to this. I truly am. I will not bar you from seeing them," he told Kira, but Nanao made a small noise of protest from behind him, "But I must insist that you never volunteer the information that their birth father is Ichimaru Gin."

Kira closed his eyes and bowed his head in resignation, "As you wish Captain Kyoraku and Captain-commander is right, your are their father now. It is up to you what they know or don't know," with that he bowed to the captains and to captain-commander and left the room.

"I am sorry," whispered Renji, "But at least you will get to see the kids! Maybe they'll let you babysit!" suggested Renji.

"You are too naive Abarai-kun," whispered Kira, his face the perfect model of despair, "Ise Nanao will never let me near them. O she might let me look at them from time to time, provided I keep my distance and the children are well supervised. But..." Kira trailed off, before smiling a melancholy smile, "I'll keep my distance. I'll keep my mouth shut. I'll do everything she wants me to do and perhaps in-time, when they are a little older, she will relent and let me be a small part of their life."

Neither Iba nor Renji liked the raw despair that lined Kira's voice but neither knew what to say. After a moment Kira turned to them and bowed slightly, "Thank you both for trying to help me. It means a lot to me, knowing that there were some people on my side. Please excuse me, I think I might just head back to squad three and... I think I'll head back to squad three," with that he left.

"Kira..." Renji whispered after him, unsure what to do. That look on Kira's face scared him.

"Let him be, Abarai," said Iba, "Sometimes a man just has to deal with things alone."

* * *

After Kyoraku and Nanao left, Yamamoto got up and made his way to the balcony overlooking Seireitei, "You do not approve of my decision, Sajin," he addressed Komamura, who was still there to help the Captain-commander with a few other issues. Most of them relating to the upcoming executions.

"Genryusai-dono," cried Komamura as he presented a bow to the captain commander's back, "I am certain your wisdom dictated your decision and I wouldn't presume..."

"Sajin."

Komamura sighed, "He is a drunken whore monger," Komamura pointed out.

"Exactly," said Yamamoto in his calm measured tone.

"I don't understand," confessed Komamura.

"I accused Kira Izuru of selfishness but in truth it is I who was being selfish. I am tired Sajin, old and tired. Recent event have proved beyond the shadow of a doubt that I am no longer able to lead the Gotei 13 effectively," declared Yamamoto.

"Genryusai-dono, you cannot blame yourself for what Aizen managed to do," cried Sajin, "His abilities were unique. He pulled the wool over all our eyes."

"Not all our eyes," whispered Yamamoto, "Ever since I met Kyoraku Shunsui I felt that he should be the one to replace me. Beyond a doubt he has the power and he is yet to reach is full potential. But more importantly, what has always impressed me is his ability to see the true nature of things. Alas! Kyoraku Shunsui is also a man who is not living up to his potential. He was forcibly entered into the Shinigami Academy by his family because he was living an aimless life. Once there he strived to do his best because he did not wish to dishonor his family or myself as his sensei. Once he joined the Gotei 13 he strived to become a captain as soon as he could, not because he wanted the responsibility, but because being a captain would allow him to do all the drinking and womanizing he could not do as a subordinate," the captain-commander hung is head slightly as he continued, "I began to despair of Kyoraku ever being ready to replace me. I despaired to the point that when it became clear that Captain Aizen Souske of the fifth squad had reached his prime, I contemplated retiring in favor of him."

"Genryusai-dono!" exclaimed Komamura in shock.

"Yes, I considered that man as my replacement," replied Yamamoto, his voice full of self-reproach, "Two things gave me pause. Firstly, Aizen was a little too likable. A little too nice and warm and friendly. Secondly, even before the true abilities of the his zanpakuto were known, it was known that its powers were those of illusion. These two facts combined often made me wonder if we really knew the true Aizen. Do not get me wrong, never in my wildest dreams did I think he was what he was. I just thought that no one could be that nice, warm and friendly. But still I was prepared to relinquish my position and hand the reigns of the Gotei 13 to him," said Yamamoto, "If only because my old bones creaked and someday's this Haori feels so very heavy on my shoulders..."

"Genryusai-dono..." whispered Komamura, the one word conveying all the concern he felt towards the man to whom he owed a debt of honor he could never truly repay.

"Kyoraku stopped me," said Yamamoto, "Just before I was going to approach Aizen regarding the decision I discussed it with Kyoraku. As I said, I was not entirely comfortable with Aizen and I wanted to see how Kyoraku would react to the news. Whether he would give me a sign that he, Kyoraku Shunsui, would one day soon be ready to assume my position. Kyoraku gave me no such hope but he did confess that Aizen Souske made him uneasy. Had made him uneasy since before Aizen became a captain. He convinced me that I should hold on. I opted to do just that if only because my unease regarding my choice of Aizen increased after my conversation with Kyoraku. Yet... I could not hold my despair at bay. Was I to bear this responsibility to my grave?" Yamamoto wondered, "Then came Hitsugaya Toshiro, wielding the strongest Ice-type zanpakuto in the history of soul society and I instinctively knew that, that boy was destined to be Captain-commander. But Hitsugaya is centuries away from his prime. Could I possibly hold on till he is ready? But," Yamamoto turned around to face Kamomura and a happy smile dance on his lips, "Today I got the first sign from Kyoraku that he is finally ready to step-up and take the reigns from my hand and soon too. Today was the first time that Kyoraku Shunsui willingly shouldered responsibility. I have no doubt that within the next decade Kyoraku will replace me and I can go on to be just Genryusai-sensei. Do you think me selfish, Sajin?"

Komamura bowed, "Not at all, Genryusai-dono, like always you have taken the path that leads to the most good. It is just unfortunate that, that path holds such pain for Kira Izuru."

"Yes," agreed Yamamoto, "That is unfortunate indeed."

* * *

When Orihime got to the twins room she found Yoruichi cuddling and cooing the little boy as Soi Fon stood by gazing at her in worshipful adoration, "You are so good with children Yoruichi-sama," said Soi Fon.

"Not as good as you," countered Yoruichi, "How many nieces and nephews do you have again?"

"One niece each by my brothers who lived long enough for their second mission," replied Soi Fon, "A pair of twin boys from the bother who survived till his sixth mission."

"That's impressive," commented Urahara Kisuke, who gently rocking little Rangiku in her rocking style cot, "Don't you think Inoue-san?"

Orihime who had seated herself next to Rangiku's cot nodded, "I always wanted lots of nieces and nephews. But sadly my brother didn't live long enough to marry or anything."

"I am surprised your brothers found the time to get married and have babies," commented Yoruichi.

Soi Fon blushed, "Well... well... you see I have only ever had one sister-in-law," explained.

Yoruichi blinked, "What's this? There is a good story here, isn't there? How come you never told me this before?"

"Well," said Soi Fon blushing furiously, "It's kind of melodramatic. You see after my eldest brother got into the Onmitsukido my parents arranged for him to be married to this orphan of the Kira clan."

"Kira clan?" wondered Urahara, "As in Kira Izuru's clan?"

Soi Fon nodded, "My sister-in-law was Kira Izuru's cousin, their father's were brothers. She was very beautiful and had a very sweet personality. Even though it was an arranged marriage my eldest brother loved her from the start, my other brother's fell for her to. So when my eldest brother died, my second brother married her so she could stay with our clan. My third brother had similar reasoning. But by the time my fourth brother married her, she had already given birth to a child so there was no longer any question of her being returned to her father's clan, he just wanted to marry her. Same with my fifth brother," she explained.

"So what happened to her?" asked Orihime.

"When she was told of my fifth brother's death she went into a fit of hysteria and in that fit she killed herself," whispered Soi Fon, "From the very start she had been prone to bouts of depression and despair. I believe Kira Izuru is the same way. She had a harder time coping with each passing death and in the end she died screaming about how it was her. That she was a curse and that's why all my brothers died. It was stupid," said Soi Fon angrily, "She wasn't cursed or anything. My brothers died because they weren't strong enough. By killing herself all she did was deprive her children of their mother and me of another sibling. I ended taking care of the children till it was time for me to enter the Onmitsukido."

They sat in silence for a few minutes before Orihime asked, "What happened to your nieces and nephews? Are they still alive?"

Soi Fon nodded, "They are fine. All of them are part of the Onmitsukido and the eldest of them has returned from her third mission! I have high hopes that they will all out live their fathers."

"I am glad to hear it," said Yoruichi, "The Onmitsukido is famous for making orphans and widows, which is why Kisuke here joined the Gotei 13 first and only joined the Onmitsukido as the captain of the detention unit after I became captain of squad two and only because he knew I would let him goof off."

"Yoruichi-sama!" exclaimed Soi Fon in shock.

Urahara blushed and Yoruichi laughed, "You can be such a stick in the mud Soi Fon," said Yoruichi. Her attention was returned to the boy in her arms when he made a small noise, "O are we keeping you awake little one? There, there, don't fret. You are such a cute boy. Hey Kisuke, let's have a baby!"

"Yoruichi-sama! What are you saying?" demanded Soi Fon as Urahara's face became redder then a tomato.

Orihime gasped, "I always wondered if there was something going on between the two of you!"

"Don't be stupid!" cried Soi Fon, "Of course there is nothing going on between Yoruichi-sama and that... that man! Yoruichi-sama was just demonstrating her famous wit!"

"O was I now?" wondered Yoruichi.

"Yoruichi-sama!" exclaimed Soi Fon again.

Yoruichi laughed, "What?" she demanded, "Don't you think Kisuke would contribute towards some very beautiful babies?"

"But the children might also get his perchance for rule breaking and laziness," said Soi Fon.

"Aha! So you don't deny that Kisuke would help make beautiful babies! I always knew you had the hots for Kisuke," declared Yoruichi.

"Yoruichi-sama!"

Orihime giggled as Urahara pulled down his hat to hide his face. The boy in Yoruichi's arm made more noises of discontentment, bringing the conversation to a halt as Soi Fon took the child from Yoruichi to settle him back to sleep, as well as check to see if he needed a diaper change. As she tucked the boy into his own cot Soi Fon sighed and said, "Just out of respect for the memory of my sister-in-law I wish I didn't have to do what I have done. Kira Izuru was born about the same time as my eldest niece. My sister-in-law often brought him to our house to play with my niece. He was always afraid of me and wouldn't come close. But he loved my sister-in-law to bits. If only for her sake, I would have liked to have not hurt him."

Yoruichi blinked, "What have you done, Soi Fon?"

"Just a favor for Ise Nanao," replied Soi Fon, "Don't worry Yoruichi-sama, I am sure Kira Izuru isn't going to go into a fit of hysteria and kill himself over this. It's just a pity," she added as she gazed down on the contently sleeping boy in the cot, "he looks so much like Ichimaru Gin."

* * *

When Kira reached his office he found the Onmitsukido tearing his office apart, "What is the meaning of this?" he demanded.

"Some of your behavior has got people talking and questioning your loyalties," said Omaeda, who was overseeing the Onmitsukido, "Captain Soi Fon has ordered that we search your office and seize any suspicious documents."

"What!" cried Kira, "What are you talking about? What behavior?"

"It has been reported that you have started calling Ichimaru Gin, Captain and before he was moved to the Shrine you were a frequent visitor," Omaeda informed him.

"This is ridiculous! Hisagi-sand and Captain Komamura was visiting Tosen Kaname, are their offices being searched, too?" he demanded.

"They didn't visit him half as much as you visited Ichimaru and Hisagi Shuhie isn't going around calling Tosen, Captain," Omaeda pointed out.

Kira opened his mouth to protest further but then noticed what Omaeda was holding in his hands, "This is all a ruse," Kira whispered, "You are not searching my office for suspicious documents, you are here confiscating any pictures I have of Captain Ichimaru. What is she going to do?" he demanded, "More importantly what does she think I will do with them?"

Omaeda sighed, "Captain Soi Fon's orders were to locate and destroy all images of Ichimaru Gin. If I had to guess I would say Ise Nanao want's to make sure that, Matsumoto's boy doesn't accidentally stumble on to one of his pictures. I haven't had a chance to see him, but I hear he looks a lot like him."

"Please," Kira begged, "Please just leave me one picture! Just one! I swear I'll make sure that he doesn't find it. I'll hide it with kido and not just lock and key. Please, Marechiyo-sama, just one."

"I am sorry Kira," said Omaeda as he shook his head, "I really am."

Kira turned away and swiftly sought the sanctuary of his room. His room had been turned inside out as well, but they were done with it and for that he was grateful. He cleared a space on his futon and sat down. Tears were begging to trickle down his face. He let them. He had failed totally and utterly. Not only was he to lose his captain in less then three days, after he was gone, he wouldn't even be left with a single picture of Captain Ichimaru Gin.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Kyoraku being suspicious of Aizen comes from the past arc. In the chapter were we see Little Nanao Kyoraku seems to have gone to check on Vice-captain Aizen and comments (to himself) that he is over thinking things. I am thinking Kyoraku could sense that something was off with "Aizen" because that Aizen was a decoy and so I just stretched that to say that Kyoraku never got comfortable around Aizen. Mountain out of molehill I know. Anyway, just to keep everything clear I made up the stuff about Soi Fon having nieces and nephews and a sister-in-law related to Kira. But of course the stuff about her five order brothers and how they died is from the manga. Hmm... I do like torturing Kira don't I? Anyway, thanks for reading and all the reviews.


	23. Chapter 23

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_2 days before the execution_

Ichimaru hadn't said anything in almost two days, which suited Tosen just fine. He did not want to spend his last days being taken potshots at by Ichimaru. Indeed, much to his surprise, Tosen found that he actually drew comfort from Ichimaru's deep depression and anguish. He never thought he was that kind of man, amazing what impending death taught you about yourself.

"Izuru," Tosen heard Ichimaru whisper to himself.

"Worried about your lieutenant again," commented Tosen, "You two are so..." he paused, "close."

"What ya imply'n, Tosen-san?" asked Ichimaru.

"Nothing," said Tosen, but his tone implied the complete opposite, "But there were always rumors. One of my men, who spent sometime in your squad, came back with tales of your 'cute little Izuru' spending the night in your room."

For a moment Ichimaru was utterly confused and had to rake his brain to recall some instance of Kira spending the night in his room. When he did finally remember, he couldn't help but smile a little, "I remember now," he said, "Poor Izuru, those girls really did a number on 'im that time." he sighed, "Wonder what happened this time ta make 'im so upset. Wonder if those girls are responsible this time as well."

"Like I said," sneered Tosen, "You are awfully close to your lieutenant."

For a moment it looked like as if Ichimaru wouldn't reply, but then, "I am close ta Izuru," said Gin, "Not in the way you're imply'n but I am close. But I have ta wonder about ya, Tosen-san," he said, "What were ya up ta with Hisagi-kun in the wee hours of the night?"

"Don't be disgusting," replied Tosen, his voice shaking with anger.

"Ya started it," Ichimaru pointed out, "But ain't it a good question? I mean, I had Rangiku. Cap'n Aizen wasn' all that interested in stuff like that but when he wanted some he always had plenty of girls will'n ta give it ta 'im. Don' think he was in ta guys but he had a choice of 'em too if he wanted. Ya on the other hand, had no one and folks weren' exactly making a line fer ya either. So I got ta know, Tosen-san, what ya make Hisagi-kun do fer ya? Or 'ere ya in ta large humanoid foxes?"

"You bastard!" screamed Tosen, "How dare you drag me down to your level?"

"My level, Tosen-san," Tosen could hear the smirk in Ichimaru's voice, "I am sure ya would do a lot ta be at my level. Tell me, Tosen-san, did it cut ya ta know I had warm arms ta slip in ta? Ta know I had such a loyal subordinate while yer's held a blade ta yer throat as soon as he found out ya are a traitor? Ta know that no matter what ya did, know matter how loyal ya were, Cap'n Aizen still preferred me watch'n 'is back?"

Tosen sneered at Ichimaru, trying to think of a cutting retort. Finally he said, "You certainly hold in high regard what you thought you had, but it must make the loss of everything bite that much more. How does it feel to know those 'warm arms' are dead and cold? How does it feel to know your loyal subordinate is at the point of breaking? How does it feel to know that because you watched Aizen-sama's back, you will die just as your children were born?"

"It ain't too bad," answered Ichimaru readily, much to Tosen's frustration and discomfort, "At least, it' mak'n me look forward ta my meet'n with the Sokyoku."

Tosen could think of nothing in reply. Frustrated he punched the nearest wall, "Damn it," he said to himself, "It wasn't enough was it, to believe in justice. To even be justice. In the end I could not vanquish the clouds that are the source of the world's evil."

"Ya still don' get it do ya, Tosen-san," whispered Ichimaru, "They path ya walked, wasn' justice. It was revenge. Ya wanted revenge against the world that took 'er from ya. Against fate that made 'er love a man who would be 'er death. There is a fine line between justice and revenge, but ya were never on the justice side of it. How could ya be? This whole justice thing, it was never yer thing. I was 'ers. She wanted ta chase away the clouds so the light of the stars would not vanish. Ya liked the clouds, ya were just too gutless ta tell 'er ya liked 'em and 'er."

Tosen was surprised, "How... how do you know these things? I never spoke to anyone about her in that amount of detail except..."

"Ya would be surprised at what Cap'n Aizen shared with me," replied Ichimaru, "Ya really would."

* * *

Kira felt utterly detached from reality as he slowly put right the third squad office after the Onmitsukido were done with it. His eyes were red and swore from crying. He honestly believed he had no more tears left to shed. Two days, two days and he would see his captain for the last time. After that there was only despair. Why had he not died during the winter war? Things would have been so much simpler if he had.

There was a faint knock on the door. Kira sighed, he really didn't want company but his in-grained politeness dictated that he respond, "Come in."

The door was opened and Orihime walked in, she was holding a large black book pressed against her chest, "Good morning, Izuru-san."

"Inoue Orihime," he said, managing a smile, "When did you arrive?"

"We arrived yesterday," said Orihime.

"I guess you are here for Matsumoto-san's funeral," he guessed, not really caring and wishing that she would just leave.

Orihime face took on a sad cast, "We were always going to come because of the executions. Not that any of us really want to attend but we were told it would be very rude and disrespectful if we did not. Then we heard about Rangiku-san's pregnancy and we were excited because from the start the babies were suppose to be born around now. Rangiku-san's funeral..." she sighed, "Last night I sneaked into the shrine where they were keeping her body and tried to, tried to reject her death," tears pooled in her eyes as she added, "I couldn't. So much for a power that trespasses into the realm of the God!" Kira said nothing, because there was nothing to say.

After a moment Orihime took a look around the room, "I gather Nanao-san had Soi Fon-san gather all pictures of Ichimaru Gin. I ended up spending the night at Squad eight barracks with the babies. When I woke up this morning I saw a big bonfire in the courtyard. I guess Nanao-san burnt them all." Kira nodded, he felt so numb he wondered if he would ever feel anything ever again.

Orihime sighed, "Rangiku-san foresaw this. She knew if something happened to her during childbirth, Nanao-san would lose it. That's why she had Kurumadani Zennosuke-san, bring this to me when he was redeployed into Karakura town about two months ago," she handed the large black book she brought with her to Kira Izuru.

Somewhat confused Kira took it and then stared. On the cover of the book was a picture of his captain. He was dressed as a Shinigami and wearing the Captain's haori, one arm casually resting across his knees, his head resting on the palm of his other hand. The caption to the picture, written in the unmistakable hand of Matsumoto Rangiku, read: _Gin on the first day of his captaincy_.

"It's a scrap book," Orihime proceeded to explain, "In the note that accompanied it, Rangiku-san said that even though Unohana-san hadn't said anything Rangiku-san could tell that she wasn't doing too well. She said she knew that if something happened to her Nanao-san would look after her babies, but she also said that Nanao-san only ever saw the pain Ichimaru Gin caused her and so would do everything to keep the fact that Ichimaru Gin was their father from the babies. She said that, that couldn't be helped but if ever her children found out the truth and wanted to know how she saw Ichimaru, she wanted them to have that opportunity. She asked me to keep the book safe and bring it back with me to Soul Society if she died and give it to you."

"Th..thank you," said Kira, he clasped the book tightly. It was more precious then his life and he would defend it with his very soul. That he swore to himself.

"She also left a note for you," said Orihime and handed him a sealed envelope.

"Thank you," he said, managing a faint smile he added, "I am glad Matsumoto-san put a picture of the captain on the cover because this way I get to see my captain. I won't open this book because it is not mine to open. I'll keep it safe for them. I'll keep it safe for the captain's children."

Orihime nodded and turned to leave, but as she reached the door she paused, "My mother and father were monsters worse then hollows. They treated me and my brother very badly. My brother ran away with me when I was three. I sometimes wish that I didn't know who and what my parents were. Because knowing isn't always better then not knowing."

Catching her meaning Kira whispered, "You don't have to worry. I know it is not my place to tell the children the truth. If they ever find out the truth, I'll be here to tell them about their father and give them the book their mother made for them," Orihime nodded and left, leaving Kira free to read the note Rangiku left him.

* * *

_Dear Kira, _

_If you are reading this then I am dead and if I am dead then my children have probably been adopted by Nanao. Nanao is a great person. Sweet, logical and grounded, well most of the time. But she has never liked Gin. However, Gin always liked her a lot. He always thought she was a good friend for me to have and would have done almost anything she asked of him. In fact, I think he liked her more because she had such a marked dislike of him. He knew, as I did, that she didn't like him because she saw clearly all the pain he caused me. Even though he brought me great joy and happiness as well, she didn't think it was enough to make-up for the pain. This was something Gin could appreciate. _

_I always hoped Nanao would get to at least tolerate Gin, but after she found out the part Gin played in hollowfying Yadomaru Lisa there was no hope of her ever forgiving him. I wish she would though. But I know she won't and I know what she will do if I die. I don't want this book to fall prey to her vindictiveness. So I am sending it away to Orihime and asking her to keep it safe till she can pass it to you. Please keep this safe, Kira, please! If not for my sake then for Gin's. _

_If our children ever want to know about their father, I want them to have the opportunity. I want them to know what our life together was like. I am sure it's going to come across a bit idealized but that'll be balanced from what they will learn of him from other sources. At least that's what I believe. Take care, Kira, and achieve bankai as soon as you can. You'll make a great captain of the third squad. _

_-Matsumoto Rangiku_

* * *

They came for him exactly at noon, Captains Soi Fon and Komamura and a four members of the Onmitsukido Correction Force. Tosen started taking slow deep breaths, panic filled his body, he didn't want to die. He didn't! As fear pumped adranaline through is body his flight or fight response started to kick in. Soi Fon narrowed her eyes and shot him a contemptuous look, as Komamuro gazed at his old friend in sympathy and sadness. _I was right_, he told himself, _I was right. I walked the path of justice. I was justice._

"Collar him," ordered Soi Fon.

"Captain two," came the whisper from Ichimaru, his back was turned to them, his gazed fixed on the Sokyoku hill, "If it' all the same with ya, can ya take me first."

Tosen blinked, Ichimaru had been serious about wanting to die. For a moment hope reared it's ugly head within his heart. There was a chance, a chance that he might get a few more days to live. Alas! Soi Fon angry retort dashed his hope to pieces, "You bastard," she said, the barely controlled rage apparent in her voice, "You selfish, self-centered bastard. Do you know how I spent my night? I spent it helping Nanao with your babies! And you know who else was there? Helping the two of us with the babies? Inoue Orihime! You remember her don't you? The girl Aizen had his Espada lackey put through psychological hell! And you? Even now you can only think of yourself! If you want to die because you have fallen into despair, then good! You deserve it! I might ask Captain-commander Yamamoto for a delay of your execution but I am certainly not helping bring it forward!"

"I don' see how me liv'n longer is gonna help my kids," replied Ichimaru.

"You know what I mean, so stop pretending," screamed Soi Fon, "There is only one thing you should be asking me for and you haven't asked for it. Now shut it," turning back to Tosen, she ordered again, "Collar him and let's get going. I want this over with."

Tosen offered no protest as the detention corp shinigamis attached the red ropes to his red execution collar, "Tosen," whispered Komamura, "I am truly sorry it had to end like this," Tosen did not reply. There was nothing to say.

* * *

The execution was well attended. The captains formed a line at the front in ascending order, leaving a gap for three, five and nine. The Vice-captains stood behind, with Hisagi Shuhie, the acting captain of squad nine, standing in between the captains and vice-captains. His body shook with repressed emotions, in front of him was a gap where is captain would have stood if he wasn't the one being executed. Behind him and to his right was another gap, where Matsumoto Rangiku would have stood if she hadn't died. Hitsugaya did not care about the gap to his left, but he frequently glanced behind him, the gap where Matsumoto Rangiku would have stood felt like a hollow hole. Yachiru who was forced to be on one side of Matsumoto's gap had her head bowed, shedding silent tears.

"Damn it all," cried Zaraki, unable to take Yachiru's crying any longer, "Do all of us really have to be here for that loser?" Ikkaku and Yumichka who should behind Yachiru nodded in agreement with their captain.

"That's what I want to know!" cried Ichigo, he, Urahara, Chad, Ishida and Yoruichi stood abreast with the captains with Ichigo being next to Ukitake, "Why can't I help Inoue babysit the twins? I know more about babies, not to mention twins, then Rukia! I helped out heaps after my sisters were born."

"Because Kurosaki-kun," replied Ukitake, "You played an instrumental part in the demise of Aizen and his arrancar army. You have to be here. Besides are you not also representing your father on this occasion?"

Ichigo huffed, "That old geezer really pisses me off sometimes. First he doesn't tell me he's a shinigami and then he has me stand-in for him at executions! At any rate, I don't see why Yachiru, Nanao-san or Toshiro, for that matter, is being made to attend this. Haven't they been through enough?"

Ukitake sighed, "That can't be helped. Sensei insisted that everything be done according to protocol. Tosen Kaname was a captain."

"Feh," said Zaraki, "That back-stabbing coward hardly deserved to be one. They should have just let me..."

"Silence!" cried Yama-jii, bringing all conversation to a halt, "they are coming."

They all turned to see Tosen being lead up the hill and to the remade Sokyoku stand. As he was led into position, Soi Fon and Komamura assumed theirs amongst their fellow captains. Komamura looking sad and dejected. "I failed," he whispered to himself, "to knock the cobwebs from his eyes. To awaken him."

When preparations were complete Yamamoto stepped forward, "Any last words, Tosen Kaname?" he asked.

Tosen stained his available senses to gauge everyone present. He smiled an ironic smile as he said, "You all seem very distracted and rather overflowing with grief. No doubt it's all over that girl. I wonder how many of you would be here if you didn't have to be. Perhaps even you wouldn't be here, Hisagi Shuhie," he commented.

"I would be here," replied Hisagi, his voice weak, "You were my captain and I learnt a lot from you. You did not follow what you taught but that doesn't mean your teachings were worthless."

Tosen sighed, "This morning Ichimaru said that I followed the path of revenge, not that of justice. Perhaps he is right. But revenge or justice I wanted to help Aizen-sama make a new world. A better world, a fairer world. A world that was not as broken as this one. And I know for certain this world is terribly broken, for I received certain proof many years ago," he explained, "Only in a horribly broken world could Ichimaru Gin be more loved and adored then me."

Kira was stunned, "What.." he started but Soi Fon interrupted him.

"Don't bother," she said, "Someone that blind is not worth wasting your breath on."

* * *

**Author's note: ***bangs head against nearest wall* How did this chapter get so long? I hope people can keep their attention through this. Anyway, the whole Kira sleeping in Ichimaru's room came from my story September. For those of you who haven't read it (and can't be bothered reading it) basically what happened was that Nemu, with the help of (not to mention under orders from) Nanao, injected Kira with a medicine that made him vomit and lose control of his bowels. Nemu did it because Kira over heard a conversation between her and Nanao that Nanao told him not to repeat to Gin. But Kira did and... things got ugly and Gin had to get Kira out of Kira's filthy room and so Kira was pretty much forced to spend the night in Gin's room since his was not inhabitable. Anyway, the moral of the story is: don't mess with the Shinigami women's association.

The last line with Soi Fon was originally suppose to be said by Zaraki, but then I came up with the formal formation for the execution and Zaraki was no where near Kira. So it was either Unohana or Soi Fon, possibly Yama-jii but it seemed like more of a Soi Fon line then anyone else.


	24. Chapter 24

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_1 day before the execution_

Yamamoto started at the bowed head of Kira Izuru, contemplating his decision. Under any other circumstances he would never grant such a request, but having said no to Kira on the matter of the twins, Yamamoto could not bring himself to say no again, "Very well, you may go see Ichimaru Gin and stay as long as you like."

"Thank you, Captain-commander," whispered Kira.

Which was how he ended up here, in the Shrine of Penitence with his captain, waiting for them to come for his captain. Waiting for the red dawn. His body feeling as if it had been hit by Wabisuke countless times. His heart was even heavier. As he sat there thinking over all that had happened over the past year, he couldn't but lament over what was to happen tomorrow. He pulled up his knees to his chest and rested his head on them. Wishing that the sun would never rise to herald the coming of the day, the day his captain was to die.

"It was me," Ichimaru suddenly said.

"Captain?"

"The night those huge hollows attacked yer class," he said, "That was my doing. Cap'n Aizen just wanted ta test 'em. I suggested he send 'em against the first years and the sixth years. I wanted ta off Hisagi ya see. Ever since he saw Rangiku he had a thing fer 'er. Everybody had a thing fer Rangiku but Rangiku actually kind of liked 'im. Me be'n me, I got really jealous and wanted Hisagi out of the way. But those damn hollows killed 'is friends but didn' managed ta kill 'im. Then ya, Abarai and Hinamori went and saved 'is ass. Ya three intrigued Cap'n Aizen. So he stepped-in."

"Stepped-in," repeated Kira, "the two of you were watching the whole time!"

"Yep," replied Ichimaru matter-of-factly, "hid ourselves with Kido. We watched the whole show, just stood there and watched those kids get slaughtered."

"Why are you telling me this, Captain?" wondered Kira.

"Maybe cause I want ya ta stop call'n me Cap'n," replied Ichimaru, "Why ya still like me so much, Izuru? Ya know what I am."

"Why did Matsumoto-san love you so much, Captain?" countered Kira, "Our emotions aren't rational. You can't always give a reason for them. But Captain I can say this for certain that you have never been an illusion to me. From the very start, from that very night, I admired you and you alone. You smile was creepy and I could tell you were as cold as your colouring. But there was something real about you. Real and raw and I thought to myself that you were a man who had experienced the same thing I had. You had felt the despair of loneliness. I don't know if it's true, but that's what I felt back then and that's what laid the foundation of my devotion," he closed his eyes and bowed his head, "I said I admired you and you alone and I mean it. Captain Aizen was too warm for me. Too reassuring, too nice, too kind, it all felt a bit much," Kira smiled mockingly to himself, "Maybe I am a masochist and so I gave my love and devotion to a sadist."

"That' wha' Rangiku used ta say," whispered Gin, smiling to himself, "She used ta say she must love pain ta be with me. But she didn' seem ta enjoy the pain. I made 'er shed so many tears. No wonder Nanao hates me so much. When they were younger, Nanao was the one who would have ta pick-up the pieces when Rangiku fell apart, unable ta keep up with my games. Back then I was try'n ta walk away, ya see. I have been try'n since the day I met Cap'n Aizen ta walk away from 'er. My hands have always been bloody, but they kept gett'n so much bloodier around Cap'n Aizen. Didn't think it was right ta keep touch'n her with 'em. But I couldn' walk away. How could I? Yeah were right, Izuru, I know what' it like ta be so alone that yer filled with despair."

"There were not many folks with spirit powers where we lived. The few who had 'em didn' come close ta me. They were all afraid of me. They found me creepy. My hunger made 'em uncomfortable. They thought me as a snake, dangerous and poisonous. So I stayed away from 'em. Lived alone far, far away from 'em all. Thought I would always be like that. Always be alone. Then I found 'er. First person I ever met who could collapse from hunger, jus' like me. I led 'er home and that was that. Ya can never truly be not alone, Izuru, cause no two people can ever think the same things, feel the same things, share everything. But just know'n she was wait'n, know'n I had a place in 'er arms, I didn' despair no more," explained Ichimaru, "I told ya, Izuru, that night I was try'n ta have those hollows off Hisagi. I didn't try again cause Rangiku figured out I was be'n jealous of 'im. She laughed at my foolishness, wrapped 'er arms around me and kissed and cuddled me till all the hate and jealousy just flowed out of me. I thought ta myself, how silly I am be'n, she ain't ever gonna love anyone but me. I am not a good man, Izuru, and the person who was most like me was Cap'n Aizen. Be'n around him really made me think I was with my own kind. But I was happiest in Rangiku's arms. She was so warm, so soft..." tears started flowing down his cheek, "I had forgotten what it was like ta be this alone. I don' care for it. I am glad it'll all be over soon."

Kira turned away, he didn't want to see his Captain's tears. He didn't want to witness his Captain's vulnerability, his despair. "I don't want you to die, Captain," the words were torn from him, against his will they escaped, "I would give anything to have you back, Captain. Anything to see you again in your haori, back leading the squad. Anything! My very soul if that's what it would take."

"The haori and the squad is yers fer the take'n now, Izuru," replied Gin, "Ya achieve bankai as soon as ya can, Izuru. Squad three won' ever get a better cap'n then ya."

Kira sobbed, taking the praise and storing it deep in his heart. He never understood why Hinamori always got so excited over the praises Aizen gave out. After all, Aizen handed out so many praises. Ichimaru's praises on the other hand were rare, rare and precious. He remembered each one and kept them close to his heart. "The sun's 'ere," said Gin, smiling brightly, "It's not a bad day to die. Not a bad day at all."

* * *

_Execution day_

They were early, several hours early. When the door opened to reveal Soi Fon at the head of a party of four members of the Onmitsukido: Kira found himself griping his body tightly, exerting every ounce of self control to not attack Soi Fon and the members of the Onmitsukido Correction Force. He was fighting against his instinct, his instinct that screamed that he had to stop these people, he had to defend his captain. But his captain did not want to be defended.

"Yer early," commented Ichimaru, sounding happy.

Soi Fon glared at him, "Captain-commander Yamamoto Genryusai Shigekuni, in an act of kindness you do not deserved, as agreed to allow you to attend the funeral of Matsumoto Rangiku. I am here to escort you there, you will be executed after the funeral."

In shock Gin opened his eyes, then they slowly slid closed and a faint grateful smile, "Remind me ta thank Ise-san for this."

"How did you know Ise Nanao was the one who asked?" asked Soi Fon, somewhat surprised.

"It wouldn' occur to anyone else," replied Gin.

"Captain..." whispered Kira, feeling useless once again. He should have been the one to make the request.

"Shackle him," ordered Soi Fon, "Make sure all his reitsu is sealed. Then collar him and let's get going."

"Captain two," called Ichimaru, "I know I don' deserve it, but I have a request..."

* * *

They picked the shrine closest to the Sokyoku hill and by the time they brought Ichimaru in, the little shrine was already filled with all the captains, vice-captians as well as the team from Karakura Town. Ikkaku and Yumichka were also there, as were all the seated officers from squad ten and any other shinigami who considered themselves close to Matsumoto Rangiku. When they got there, Soi Fon ordered, "Remove the collar and let him be. Not like he can do anything with the entire Gotei 13 here," before she turned and disappeared in a burst of Shunpo.

Free, save for the reitsu depriving shackles, Ichimaru made his way to the front of the shrine. They had laid Rangiku in a coffin full of Chrysanthemum, Haineku rested against her stomach. Stooping down he laid a soft kiss on her forehead, "I hope yer next life is happier then this one was," he whispered, "I would wish ta be with ya again but I know there won' be another life fer me. Besides I think I caused ya enough pain ta last all eternity," planting another kiss, he turned away. Briefly his eyes feel on the folks sitting on the front row.

Hitsugaya, Kyoraku, Nanao, Orihime and Ichigo. Nanao and Orihime were holding the twins. He tore his eyes a way before he could see them. He didn't want to see, there was no point. Slowly he made his way to the back of the Shrine, where Kira stood with the Onmitsukido Shinigamis. Half way there Yachiru jumped up to hug him, "Stupid Foxy!" she cried, "Why did you have to go betray us!"

He smiled as he hugged her, "Cause I am a fox and foxes love trick'n people," he said, Yachiru sobbed, "I am gonna miss our tea parties," he told her.

"Me too!" she wailed.

"Ya can always keep hav'n tea parties with Izuru," suggested Ichimaru.

"And the twins!" said Yachiru, "I'll have tea parties with Izurun and the twins and I'll dress the twins up as stuffed toys and cuddle them so much!"

Gin smiled, "Ya do that," with that he kissed her softly on the head before he set her down and continued on his way.

Just as he took his place next to Kira, Soi Fon returned carrying Shinsou. Entering the shrine from a door near the front, she approached Rangiku's coffin and gently laid Shinsou next to Heinaku. "Shinsou and I," said Ichimaru to Kira, "Never saw eye ta eye on half the things I did. He used ta say that he didn' care if I lived or died. He jus' wanted ta be in cuddle distance of Heinaku and Rangiku. Well, he's been good ta me. Least I can do is make sure he get's ta stay close ta 'em from now on."

Kira said nothing, just kept his eyes fixed on the coffin and for a moment, just for a moment he swore he say a silver fox curl up next to an ash cat. He closed his eyes to clear his head. He should go forward and pay his last respect to Matsumoto but... he couldn't. He just couldn't bring himself to leave his captain's side. When he opened them again he noticed Orihime looking at them. Her eyes were sad but then they took on a determined cast.

She stood-up, "Oi! Inoue," called Ichigo, but she ignored him.

Marching determinedly up to Ichimaru she said, "You should look," she stated flatly, "All Rangiku-san could talk about in her letters is how much she hoped that the twins would get here before... you should look," she repeated firmly.

Slowly Ichimaru turned his gaze to the sleeping infant against her bosom, "She looks like Rangiku," he whispered as he reached for his daughter, gently Orihime turned the baby over. Careful so that the shackles didn't hurt her, "Sorry," he whispered to the infant, "Sorry I have ta hold ya wear'n shackles," the baby made a small noise before briefly opening her eyes, "Ya have my eyes," Gin told her in wonder, the baby seemed to focus on him before closing her eyes and going back to sleep. Gin smiled a real smile and kissed her gently on the forehead.

Watching from his seat, Ichigo came to a decision. Getting up he approached Nanao and held out his arms. For a moment all Nanao did was hold the baby boy closer to her, "Nanao-san..." Ichigo whispered, reluctantly she handed the boy over then turned and buried her face in Kyoraku's chest and wept uncontrolably.

As Ichigo approached them, Orihime took the girl back. When Ichimaru saw the boy, deep sadness filled him, "Ya look like me," he whispered to the boy, "I wish ya didn'. I didn' want that."

"What!" cried Ichigo a little angrily, "You don't like how he looks?"

"It ain't that," replied Ichimaru, "I don' want him grow'n up pay'n for my sins."

"That's not going to happen," Orihime assured him, "Nanao-san, Kyoraku-san and everybody else will make sure it doesn't happen."

Ichimaru nodded and reached for his son, "What ya name 'im?" he asked as he cradled the boy, "I mean, I am assum'n ya named my li'l angel Rangiku."

"Yes," replied Orhime, "Rangiku-san made it clear that girl was to be named after her. But," she tilted her chin towards the boy, "He doesn't have a name yet," she explained, "Rangiku-san died before she picked a name and with everything that's been happening, Kyoraku-san hasn't picked one yet either."

"I see," whispered Gin, after a moment's thought he moved forward. The Onmitsukido Shinigamis tensed, but Soi Fon had told them to let Ichimaru be. He approached Captain Kyoraku and Nanao, causing the latter to pull away from the former, "Name 'im Shunsui," he said to Kyoraku, "Rangiku wanted ta name 'im after 'is father. Ya're his father now, so ya should name him after yerself."

Kyoraku blinked in suprised but nodded, "I will," he assured Gin as he took the boy, took little Shunsui from him.

Gin smiled, a true smile, "Thanks, Captain eight, fer tak'n care of 'em."

"Don't mention it," replied Kyoraku, "I always wanted kids and creepy bastard though you are Ichimaru-kun, you sure helped make some cute kids."

"Thanks," whispered Gin before turning to Nanao, "Ya don' look so good, Nanao."

"What happened to Ise-san?" she demanded, refusing to look at him, keeping her eyes fixed on her friend's coffin.

"Ya want me ta call ya Ise-san?" wondered Gin.

"Not really," replied Nanao, "I always knew that you used the -san, -kun and even -chan honorifics to mock people. That's why you never used any of them with Rangiku and Kira."

Gin smiled, leaning down he planted a soft kiss on Nanao's cheek, "Thanks Nanao," he whispered into her ears, "fer everyth'n."

* * *

They opted to walk from the shrine to the execution grounds. Feeling every step, the procession of captains, vice-captains and the team from Karakura Town marched onwards. Ironically, the only one who was eager to get to the execution stand was Ichimaru himself. There was nothing left for him in this world anymore, Rangiku was gone, Aizen was gone, Kira would recover in time and his children were better off without him. Nothing remained for him. Nothing at all. It was time to make the acquaintance of the Sokyoku.

Isane sobbed, "Is it wrong, captain," she wondered, "that I think it's a good think Rangiku-san isn't here for this?"

Unohana shook her head, "No it is not wrong," whispered Unohana.

Suddenly two twin lungs rent the air with pityful wails. "Take them away," ordered Yamamoto, "An execution is no place for infants. I am surprised you girls contemplated bringing them along in the first place. Vice-captain Ise you are excused, as are you Inoue Orihime."

"But..." began Orihime.

"No," whispered Nanao, "Captain-commander is right. We'll stay here," the procession moved on.

When they were all in position and Ichimaru had been led onto the Sokyoku stand, Yamamoto asked, "Any last words, Ichimaru?"

Gin opened his eyes, revealing to all the vibrant blue orbs he had been hiding, "Farewell," he whispered, "Sorry."

* * *

**Author's Note: **http : // www . mangatoshokan . com / read / bleach / 1 / 178 / 9


	25. Chapter 25

**The truth behind the smile**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!!

* * *

_50 years after the execution_

Tenth of September, the day his captain was born. Kira lay in bed honestly wondering if anyone would miss him if he just didn't turn-up to work today. After all, Captain Ichimaru used to disappear all the time. Kira had always managed to keep thing going, had never panicked. Well he did the first few times and his Vice-captain would be banging on his door demanding to know what was wrong if Kira just stayed in bed. His Vice-captain knew him to be a captain who never missed work, even when he was sick. Kira sighed, there was no helping it. He was simply too dutiful a captain to indulge himself. But... getting up he opened his closet and from deep within it's hidden recesses he brought out the book. The scrap book that Matsumoto Rangiku had put together for her children. He sat down on the bed and stared at the picture of his captain that was on the cover. His captain, dressed in his haori, sitting and posing obediently for the woman he loved. Smiling his smirk, hiding his vivid blue eyes. As he had said to Inoue Orihime all those years ago, he would not open the book because it was not his to open. But he often brought it out to gaze at the picture on the cover. "Why can't I forget you, Captain?" he asked out loud, "Why do I still miss you?"

Alas! The picture was just a picture and it could not answer his question. Sighing he set aside the book and started to get ready for work. Perhaps he would indulge himself a little and work from the office that adjoined his private quarters and not the main office that he shared with his Vice-captain.

* * *

Hours later Kira found himself sitting at this desk quietly working through his mountain of paperwork when the window behind him was thrown open, "Hide me!" cried little Shunsui, as he climbed in, trembling from head to toe, "Rukia-chan and Yachiru-chan are after me. They want to dress me up like a bunny rabbit and take pictures!"

Blinking Kira got up and opened the door to his adjoining private quarters, "You can hide in my room," he said.

"Thanks!" said the boy before rushing in and shutting the door firmly behind him.

No sooner was he inside that Yachiru throw open the door to his office and walked-in, "Izurun!" she called cheerfully, "Have you seen Shunsui? I thought I saw him heading towards squad three."

Before Kira could answer Rukia walked in carrying little Rangiku dressed in a frilly dress with an equally frilly hat, "I am Mary!" Rangiku informed Kira, smiling happily.

"We found a book of nursery rhymes from the living world and Rangiku really like the one about Mary and her little lamb," Rukia explained, "So we thought we would dress Rangiku up as Mary and Shunsui up as the rabbit and take pictures!"

"Ah, don't you mean lamb?" asked Kira.

"No because rabbits are so much cuter then lambs," said Rukia smiling brightly, as Yachiru nodded in agreement.

"Well he's not here," said Kira, "As you can see."

"Well send him to us if you see him," said Yachiru as they left, "That boy really is getting good as masking his reitsu," she commented as they started walking away.

"It's all the games of hide and seek he plays with Shiro-chan," Rangiku told them, "He's always playing hide and seek or shunpo tag with, Shiro-chan. It's so unfair! He hogs all the attention from Shiro-chan."

"Well you hog all the attention from Captain Hisagi," Rukia pointed out, "So it balances out."

"But Shuhei-chan is my one true love!" protested Rangiku, "It's hardly the same thing."

"Don't say that in front of Shun-shun or Hisagi-chan will be in loads of trouble," Kira heard Yachiru saying before the three of them went out of his ear shot.

Smiling to himself, Kira opened the door to the adjoining room and said to Shunsui, "You can come out now, they are..." the words died in his throat as he spied the boy standing in the middle of the room holding the scrap book, the scrap book that had a picture of Ichimaru Gin on the cover. How could he have forgotten to put it away!

"So I do look like him," said Shunsui.

Kira started as comprehension hit him, "You know!" he cried, "How?"

"Figured it out," said Shunsui cheerfully, "I mean look at me," he said tugging his silver, silver hair, "I don't look like dad and I don't look like mom. So I must have been adopted. But if I was, who is my father? Why doesn't anyone talk about how me and Rangiku are adopted? Not like it would change anything. My dad would still be by dad, you know," he stated.

"Which must mean they don't want us to know about our father. If so, why? Figured he wasn't someone people liked talking about or maybe that mommy had never told them who he was before she died. But from time to time Yachiru-chan compares me to someone she calls Foxy. She doesn't do it on purpose and hates herself for it once she realizes. So I figured this Foxy was my father. Then we found Gin the Fox and Ichimaru the Snake and you told me Ichimaru Gin and mom were friends. Nanao-san looked like she had seen a ghost when she saw those dolls. The dolls were silver, and one of them was a fox. Plus you said that some people thought Ichimaru Gin was a very clever Kitsune. So I figured that Ichimaru Gin was called Gin cause he had silver hair just like me and Yachiru-chan used to call him Foxy. After that it was pretty obvious," declared the boy.

"Explained why you can't look at me without getting all sad, why Hinamori looks like she wants to hit me with Tabiume every time she sees me. Then there are all the puzzles he left for us, why there are no pictures of him anywhere and him being our father explained better the one time those shinigami from squad five tried to hurt Rangiku," he said, "So you know, it all fit into place," he said with a bright proud smile. Happy that he was able to figure out the puzzle by himself.

"You are clever," whispered Kira, "Just like your father."

Shunsui smiled a warm gentle smile, the kind his mother used to give to her friends, "So what's this?" he asked holding up the book.

"It's a scrap book your mother made for you and Rangiku," explained Kira, "I never opened it but in the note she left me with it, she said that it had little bits of things from the life they shared."

"Oh!" exclaimed Shunsui, "Cool," he said as he jumped onto Kira's bed. Sitting down he patted the spot next to him, "Let's open it together!"

Kira sat down beside him, "Today was his birthday, you know," he whispered.

"Really?" cried Shunsui, "So mommy and him were born on the same month!"

"Not quite," said Kira, "Matsumoto-san couldn't remember the date of her birth. So the captain, the captain made the date they met into her birthday."

Shunsui gasped, "I didn't know that!" He opened the book, on the first page was a picture of Gin holding Rangiku tightly around the waist, as he rested his chin on her shoulder. Kira blinked and ran a slow finger along the length of the caption that went with the picture, in was written in the neat hand of his captain and read simply: _I did love her_.

Kira felt a soft hand on his cheek, he turned his head slightly to catch a glimpse Shunsui's concerned face, "He must have been something," said Shunsui, "To still make you cry," it was then that Kira realized his cheeks were wet with tears, "Tell me about him," urged the little boy.

"I will," said Kira, "But I warn you, it's a very sad story. Just the kind, the captain hated."

* * *

**Author's note:** Finished! Done! Complete! I know this is probably not the ending most people envisioned but I hope you like it still. Now does little Shunsui tell little Rangiku what he found out? Does he take the scrap book with him or leave it with Kira and come look at it in squad three? Does Nanao end up getting in trouble with the kids for her actions fifty years ago? I wanted to leave those things ambiguous. I thought about writing to make these questions clear but there is such a thing as too much detail.

I hope you guys like this, which at the moment is my second longest fanfiction ever both in word count and chapter count. This turned out longer then I expected it to. I honestly didn't think I had this much to say on Gin and Rangiku. But now I think I have made mountains of the every molehill out there. Nothing left to do but hope KT gives us more.


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